They Can Help With Harassment Insurance

, , , , , , | Working | August 10, 2017

(I’ve been getting calls almost daily from an insurance company — although I am sceptical that it is one — and I’ve politely turned them down every time. This has been going on for about two weeks, with phone calls and flyers, and I finally have enough over the last two days.)

Day #1:

Rep #1: *goes into sales pitch*

Me: “Hold on a moment, I can’t hear you over my TV.”

Rep #1: “Oh, what are you watching, darling, The Kardaaaashians?”

Me: “Why, no, a History of Cannibalism– Hey, he hung up!”

Day #2:

(I call their listed number after getting three calls in 15 minutes, and the rep starts into the sales pitch.)

Me: “Hold it! I want to speak to a supervisor.”

Rep #2: “Ma’am, I can help you with all your insurance needs.”

Me: “Oh, not with this one. Supervisor, now.”

Supervisor: “What seems to be the problem, ma’am?”

Me: “Is your company aware what ‘harassment’ is?”

Supervisor: “Ma’am?”

Me: “I have been getting calls daily for two weeks from you guys, sometimes up to three times a day. When I don’t answer at work, I get called five minutes apart! I was insulted by your rep yesterday, and one called me ‘Mrs’, when my information clearly says ‘Miss.’ Minor, but to me that says you do not have proper authorization to my information, and are a scam. So, are these phone calls and flyers stopping, or do I need to go to the police for harassment?”

Supervisor: “Ma’am, we just want you to have the proper insurance in the case of an accident!”

Me: “Great, but I am rather old fashioned and do not conduct such business over the telephone with a cold caller! I have turned down every single call, I have not returned one flyer, and I do not like getting three calls in 15 minutes while I am at work! So, will the calls and flyers stop, or do I need to go to the police?”

Supervisor: “We’ll remove you from our list, ma’am. Have a nice day!”

(Rude of me, maybe. I get that they’re just doing a job. But enough was enough!)

Time To Face The Music, And Leave

, , , , | Right | August 6, 2017

(When I am just starting out as a DJ, I work a charity event for free for a church that my friend works for. The event is supposed to end at 1:00 am. At about 1:05, when the last song is fading out, a guest approaches me.)

Guest: “Do you have [Obscure Song]?”

Me: “No.”

Guest: “What kind of DJ are you?”

Me: “One that travelled from [City five hours away] to do this event for free.”

Direction Deflection

, , , , | Right | June 21, 2017

(This takes place over the phone:)

Customer: “Hi, can you tell me which side of the street your store is on?”

Me: “Absolutely, we’re on the west side.”

Customer: “Is that on the left or the right?”

Me: “That depends on which direction you’re coming from. Are you coming from the North end or the South end?”

Customer: “I don’t know!”

Me: “Well, will you come through [major Southern intersection] or [major Northern intersection]?”

Customer: “How the h*** am I supposed to know? Look, is it on the left or the right? What is so hard about this?”

Me: “If it helps, we’re in the same plaza as [Chain Restaurant], and across the street from [Chain Store].”

Customer: “No, that does NOT help! I’m new to the area!”

Me: “Do you have a GPS? I could give you the address to plug in.”

Customer: “I don’t need a GPS! I have a great sense of direction!”

Unfiltered Story #90053

, , , | Unfiltered | June 20, 2017

*Phone rings*.

Me: “[store], [my name] speaking.”

Customer: “Sorry, I wanted [competitor].” *Hangs up*

About a minute later. *Phone rings*

Me: “[store], [my name] speaking.”

Customer: “Aargh, I wanted [competitor]!” *Hangs up*

Less than a minute later *Phone rings*

Me: Sigh “[store], [my name] speaking.”

Customer: “[expletive deleted], why can’t I get [competitor]?”

Me: “Well, if you keep calling the same number, you’re going to keep getting the same store.”

Customer: “But this is the number I was given!” *Hangs up*

Seconds later *Phone rings*

Me: “[store] -”

Customer: *Cuts me off* “[expletive deleted] if you say you’re [store] again, I’m going to come down there and kill you.”

Me: “…yeah, I still work for [store], and I should tell you that as soon as we are done here, I will be forwarding your phone number to the police. Have a nice day.”

*Hangs up*

I called the police immediately after. It turns out he has a long history of making threats, and was currently out on bail for a similar charge. I’m guessing it was revoked.

Punched Out And Ready For A Punch Up

, , , , , | Right | June 11, 2017

(I am working as a cashier supervisor at a large store. I’ve just clocked out since my coworker has taken over to do the closing shift. A cashier stops me as I’m about to leave the store, not in any uniform and clearly dressed in my winter outdoor clothing.)

Cashier: “Hey [My Name], [Coworker] is busy. Can you override this markdown on your way out?”

Me: “No problem.”

Customer: “I’d suggest you get here a little faster next time.”

Me: “I’d suggest you don’t take that tone with me. I barely get paid enough to give a f*** about you when I am on the clock. I certainly don’t care when I’m punched out.”

(The cashier high-fived me and I smirked and walked out the door.)

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