They’re Not On The Same Page

, , , , | Right | May 14, 2018

(We’re a toy store with a sizable book section. A customer comes in with one of our bags and a book to return with her receipt. I take the receipt and the book and start doing her return when she picks up another bag from a competing book store.)

Customer: “So, I bought this from [Competing Book Store] and I don’t have a receipt, but it’s so far away… Can I return this here?”

Me: “Um… No, ma’am, I’m sorry. We don’t even sell this book.”

Customer: “Oh, well. Worth a try!”

(I finished her return and she went off with her things. I’m baffled she actually thought it would work.)

Customers Like This Are Why The Chicken Crossed The Road

, , , , , | Right | June 26, 2017

Customer: “I’ll have the chicken club.”

Me: “I’m sorry; we only have ham and turkey club sandwiches.”

Customer: “No chicken?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Just ham or turkey?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “What about a smoked meat club?”

Me: “No, sorry.”

Customer: “Chicken?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Ham or turkey?”

Me: “Yes.”

Customer: “No smoked meat?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “I can’t get a smoked meat club?”

Me: “Sorry. Only turkey or ham.”

Customer: “Chicken?”

Me: “No.”

Customer: “Smoked meat?”

Me: “No.”

(This continued for a solid three minutes while a coworker stood nearby laughing. The customer ended up ordering spaghetti and I died a little inside.)

Could Have Scooted Over To The Bank

, , , , , | Right | June 21, 2017

(It’s three minutes before close and my manager is next to me closing another register. An eight-year-old girl comes up to my till with her grandparents to buy a scooter. Note that in Canada, we have $1 and $2 coins.)

Grandmother: “I’m sorry about this.”

Me: *thinking it’s about how late it is* “Oh, it’s no problem—”

Grandmother: “No, you’ll see.”

(My and my manager’s eyes bulged. The woman took out her granddaughter’s allowance that the girl had saved up to spend — all of it in coins in six plastic baggies. My manager and I desperately began counting it, taking ten minutes between us to do it. The girl had saved up $165.65 in coins to spend that day. What’s worse was that there are two banks across the parking lot from our store they could have gone to change the coins.)