Dirty Tricks

, , , , | Right | May 21, 2019

(I have bought too much potting soil, and I’m waiting in line to return what I didn’t need. The people in front of me are trying to return an obviously used sump pump, claiming they just bought it. I wait in line for about five minutes while the cashier, soon joined by her manager, navigates the return. Finally, they just decide to give them their money back. After this transaction, the manager waves me to a second register and takes care of my return.)

Manager: “Man, some people are just terrible liars. There’s no way they just bought that. The lengths that some people go to to save a few bucks…”

Me: “Well, I promise that I didn’t empty this bag and fill it full of regular dirt.”

Manager: *laughs* “You’re just fine.”

Me: “And I almost got away with it, too!”

1 Thumbs

When You Can’t Give Them Something To Complain About…

, , , , | Right | May 7, 2019

(I get a call from a customer who clearly wants to find something to get angry about. One of my coworkers sits behind me, talking slowly and loudly to another customer on the phone. My customer gets very upset about this.)

Customer: “Who is being so loud?”

Me: “That is one of my coworkers. I apologize about that; we sit rather close and our headsets are very sensitive.”

Customer: “That is no way to talk to a customer. I want you to cut her phone cord and shove the headset down her throat. I demand to talk to a manager.”

(I ended up transferring her to a manager, all while apologizing profusely. It turns out that my coworker, who just so happens to be the nicest person in the whole call center, had a customer who was partially deaf and had difficulty understanding what was being said. Both she and my manager were shocked and thought it was hilarious. At least the customer couldn’t find anything I was doing to get mad about!)

1 Thumbs

Will Need To Have A Late-Night Conversation About Timing

, , , , | Right | December 5, 2017

(I normally work retail, but I’m the customer in this story. Some friends and I have gone out to eat at about 10 pm. We eat and talk for quite a while, and the waitress brings us our check around 11 pm. My friends continue talking for another forty-five minutes or so. It’s then that I realize how late it’s getting, and that there’s only us and one other table left.)

Me: “You know, we should probably get going soon. It’s getting pretty late.”

(My friends half-heartedly agree, but continue talking. A little while later, another waitress pointedly sweeps up around our table.)

Me: “I’m pretty sure these guys close at 11.”

Friend: “Oh, I bet they have to stay late all the time. This isn’t too bad.”

(A little more time goes by, and I notice that we are now the only table left, and all the workers are sitting at the other end of the restaurant either staring at us or talking quietly among themselves. It’s now after midnight.)

Me: “Okay, guys, we’re the only table left. They’re done cleaning up and want to close. We should probably get going.”

(We finally got up and left. Our waitress quietly thanked us for coming in as she locked the door behind us. The real kicker? The friends were my retail coworkers!)

1 Thumbs

Unfiltered Story #100010

, , | Unfiltered | November 15, 2017

I’m working the pre-close shift on a pretty slow Tuesday. Not a lot of people have come in, and my coworkers and I are all relaxed, when someone pulls up to the drive through.

Me: (through the headset) Welcome to (Fast Food Place), what can I get for you tonight?
Customer: Could I have your 4 for 4 deal, please?
Thinking I misheard her, I enter in our 2 for $4 deal, and try to confirm.
Me: Was that the 2 for $4 deal?
Customer: No, like the 4 for 4 deal? With the fries, and the burger?
I suddenly realize what she’s talking about, and have to stifle a laugh.
Me: Um, are you thinking of Wendy’s? Because we don’t have a 4 for 4 deal, or burgers for that matter.
Customer: Really? Then what were you trying to sell me?
Me: I can get you the 2 for $4 roast beef deal, which is two classic sandwiches for $4.
Customer: Alright, sounds good.
Me: Okay, and what else can I get for you?
Customer: Can I switch out for two frosties?
At this point, I don’t know what she’s talking about, so I just say nothing.
Customer: (realizing her mistake) Is that Wendy’s again? OH, MY H***, I HATE WENDY’S!
I am shaking with silent laughter, while my coworkers who have been hearing the conversation are laughing their heads off. After that, the order went smoothly, but for the rest of the night I had a smile on my face at the thought of the “I hate Wendy’s lady.”

Unfiltered Story #96349

, , , | Unfiltered | September 26, 2017

(I work at a clothing store that has the ability to order merchandise online as well, so we deal with a lot of online returns. A woman comes up returning just one item from her online order, and the interaction goes pretty smoothly until the end.)

Me: Okay, we’ll just send [total] back to your credit card then!

Customer: Wait, that’s not right, shouldn’t it be [total about four dollars higher]?

(I take a look at her invoice and spot the problem fairly quickly.)

Me: Oh, the amount you’re thinking of is including the $3.99 shipping. You paid [total] for this shirt, and that’s what we’re refunding you.

Customer: But shouldn’t I get shipping refunded as well?

Me: No, we don’t do shipping refunds here. The online customer service sometimes does when there’s a shipping problem, but not for just a return like this.

Customer: But I’m returning the item. So, I should get back everything that I paid.

Me: Well, [Company] doesn’t get the money you paid for shipping… that’s what they use to pay the company that delivers your package, I’m assuming.

Customer: Yes, but I’m returning the item! Stop trying to cheat me out of my money!

Me: Ma’am, this item was shipped and delivered to you without a problem. That’s where the shipping cost went. There’s honestly nothing I can do to refund that $3.99 to you, I can only refund the cost of the shirt you’re returning. If you have a problem with that, you can contact online customer service at the phone number listed on your invoice.

(The customer finally grudgingly accepted that she wasn’t getting her shipping costs back and left in a huff, vowing never to order from our online store again.)