A Super-Smart-Aleck

| Toronto, ON, Canada | Related | May 7, 2013

(I am taking my five-year-old son to the optometrist for his yearly eye check-up.)

Doctor: *to my son* “So, are you have any trouble seeing things?”

Son: “ Well my regular vision’s fine, but I’m still working on my x-ray vision.”

Infinitely Loopy, Part 6

| AZ, USA | Working | January 17, 2013

(I’m at the optician. After spending several minutes adjusting my new glasses to sit properly on my face, the optician realizes that she has to adjust the ear pieces. This is because one of my ears is slightly lower than the other.)

Optician: “Here they are! They look great!” *hands me my glasses*

Me: “Great! They really are nice and level now!”

Optician: “And here’s a nice hard case that comes with them so they won’t be damaged.” *hands me the case*

Me: “Um, these won’t fit in this case. Can I have a soft one?”

(I show her how the adjusted ear piece prevents the case from closing all the way.)

Optician: “Oh, I can fix that!”

(The optician takes out the glasses and bends the ear piece that she just spent 10 minutes working on back into its original position.)

Optician: “See? Now it closes.”

Me: *sighs*

(I pull the glasses out and put them on my face. As expected, they are now completely askew.)

Optician: “Oh, um, let’s fix those.”

(10 minutes later, they look good again.)  

Optician: “All set!”

Me: “Can I have that soft case, please?”

Optician: “Don’t you want the protective hard one?”

Me: “No. Remember how they don’t fit in there?”

Optician: “Um, okay, if you’re sure…” *hands me a soft case* “Anything else I can help you with?”

Me: “No. Please don’t help me any more.”

Related:
Infinitely Loopy, Part 5
Infinitely Loopy, Part 4
Infinitely Loopy, Part 3
Infinitely Loopy, Part 2
Infinitely Loopy

Right In Front Of Your Nose

| London, UK | Working | December 4, 2012

(I have an eye test and am looking for new glasses to purchase. I had already seen a pair I liked on a previous visit; they’re just the pair I currently own, but in a different color combination.)

Me: “I was interested in a pair just like mine, but in purple and black instead of blue and brown.”

Optician: “Let me have a look if we still have it in the back…”

(She goes off, comes back, asks to see my glasses for their reference, goes again and returns to hand me back my glasses.)

Optician: “It looks like we are out of the purple and black ones. But we still have the blue and brown!”

Me: “Well, I already have the blue and brown.”

Optician: *silent*

Me: “…right now as we speak…”

Optician: *still silent*

Me: “…on my nose!”

Optician: *completely serious* “Oh, really?”

Your Service Is Crazy, So Call Me Maybe

| Newport, England, UK | Working | August 1, 2012

(Note: I’ve ordered some glasses on a 2-for-1 offer.)

Optician: “We’ll have them ready for you in a couple of weeks. We’ll give you a call to come in when they are ready.”

Me: “I can just pop by in a couple of weeks.”

Optician: “No, we’ll call you when they’re ready.”

(Two weeks pass without a call from the optician, so I decide to pop in anyway.)

Me: “Are my glasses ready yet?”

Optician: “No. We said we’d call you when they’re in.”

Me: “Oh, okay.”

Optician: *sighs* “Let me check…”

(They pop off to the back before returning.)

Optician: “Okay, one pair is in, but the other pair got damaged when they were making it. We don’t know when it will come in. We will call you when it comes in.”

Me: “I can just pop in in a few weeks.”

Optician: “No. We will call you when it’s in. Don’t come in till then!”

(Three weeks go by, and again there is no phone call. So, I decide to go in anyway.)

Me: “Hi, have my glasses come in?”

Optician: “We said we’d call you when they are in!”

Me: “Can you check anyway?”

Optician: *checks* “Oh… wait. Yes, here they are!”

Perceiving Percival

| Minneapolis, MN, USA | Right | July 3, 2012

Me: “Was there any particular style of glasses you where looking for today?”

Customer: “I’m looking for some horn rimmed, half-moon spectacles.”

(As an avid Harry Potter fan, I recognize this as the word-for-word description of a certain character’s glasses.)

Me: “I’m sorry, Professor Dumbledore, but I believe we sold our last pair this morning.”

Customer: *surprised* “Oh, wow! I really wasn’t expecting anyone to catch that!”

1 Thumbs
2,395
VOTES
Page 3/712345...Last