Unfiltered Story #119086

, | Unfiltered | September 1, 2018

(My brother and I own a small bake shop. We give a discount to students, but people are always trying to scam us to get the discount when they don’t deserve it)
Me: Okay, so your total is [amount].
Customer: But what about the discount?
Me: Are you a student?
Customer: No…
Me: Then you don’t get one.
Customer: What about the family discount?
Me: …excuse me?
Customer: The owner’s my kid brother. Family gets a discount here. Didn’t they tell you when they hired your stupid a**?
Me: …one sec (I turn towards the kitchen) Yo! [brother]! Come out here for a sec
(My brother, who is 6’5″ and built like a train comes out and towers over my “brother” and I)
Brother: What?
Me: Apparently I’m not the eldest. Meet our older brother.
(the customer is starting to look pretty nervous now)
Me: Now, he’s our brother, and we should treat him with respect, but apparently I didn’t do a good enough job explaining the discount… Could you assist?
(my brother has a slight language disorder, so he doesn’t mince his words, and he does not suffer fools gladly. Now very grumpy, he turns towards our would-be brother)
Brother: Is he a student?
Me: Nope!
(Brother crouches down and looks the customer dead in the eye)
Brother: No. Discount.

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Putting You On The Burner Now

, , , , , | Related | August 31, 2018

I don’t cook very often; I only ever use the stove to make grilled cheese sandwiches. I have my own personal frying pans for this purpose. When I finish making the sandwich, I always leave the pan on the stove, but on the exact opposite burner, so that I can safely cool it down.

One day, my dad comes downstairs while I’m on the computer and starts pitching a fit at me. He scolds me for leaving a burner on. He’s burned his hand trying to get my pan away from it and turn it off. I’m confused; not only did I turn the burner off before I left — I’m not that stupid — but I always put the pan on the opposite end of the stove from the burner I used, just in case. I hate being blamed for things I didn’t do, so we end up getting into a pretty big shouting match over it.

Later on, he comes back down to apologize; the idiot who turned the burner on and left it unattended was my mom.

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Not Caught With Your Pants Down

, , , , , | Friendly | August 30, 2018

(I am a twenty-year-old woman and I recently went to a professional baseball game and bought a jersey there. I like jerseys that are loose and somewhat baggy, so the one I bought is a little long on me. During the middle of the game I go to get something to drink and I am waiting at the top of the stands to be let back down to my seat. A woman in her 60s or 70s has been glaring at me the entire time I’ve been standing there, but I don’t think anything of it. When a twelve-year-old boy walks up to wait, she storms off and returns with a security guard.)

Woman: *points at me* “There she is, Officer! I want her arrested right now!”

(Everyone is staring at me, and the security guard looks very confused.)

Security Guard: “Her? Um, for what, exactly?”

Woman: “For public indecency! Look at her! She isn’t wearing any pants! And with a child right next to her!”

Boy: “Child?! I’m almost 13!”

Me: “Um, excuse me, but I have pants on; I’m wearing shorts. My jersey is long, so it covers them up. See?” *lifts my jersey up to show her that I AM wearing shorts*

Woman: “Oh, um…”

Security Guard: *turns to the woman* “Ma’am, I think you’d better return to your seat.”

(I told my boyfriend what happened when I got back to my seat. He couldn’t stop laughing at the idea of someone thinking I would walk around a public stadium full of thousands of people with no pants on!)

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Sale Fail, Part 4

, , , | Right | August 30, 2018

(I am working alone in a chocolate store. I transferred from another store about three months ago. I get a call, and thankfully it isn’t busy.)

Customer: “Hello, I am wondering if you have a sale for your chocolates going on?”

Me: “Well, we always have a sale on something. What are you looking for today, sir?”

Customer: “Buy-three-get-three-free on the showcase.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, we just finished that sale.”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “We only had it for the summer; it’s October.”

Customer: “But you always have it during this time!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but the sale is done.”

Customer: “How long have you been here for?”

Me: “Over a year, sir.”

Customer: “See? You haven’t been here long enough!”

Me: “If you want, this Saturday, we’re having a similar sale for one night. Buy two, get one free.”

Customer: “When’s that?”

Me: “Well, it’s [event], and between seven to ten we’re having that sale.”

Customer: “Good. That’s the sale I want. Goodbye.” *hangs up*

(I remembered later that he would need tickets to get that sale, since it was a charity event, and I wasn’t working it.)

Related:
Sail Fail, Part 3
Sail Fail, Part 2
Sale Fail

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Not Even Offering Them A Deal(ership)

, , , , , , , | Legal | August 29, 2018

While driving my parents’ car on a long trip at night, the engine just stops and all the warning lights come on. I’m able to get the car off the road and open the hood. There is a massive amount of smoke and steam coming from the engine and after checking, I find that there is no coolant at all in the reservoir. I get to wait by the car while arrangements are made to pick both the car and me up.

The next day after examining the car, it is determined that a coolant hose came off while I was driving, and that caused the engine to overheat and seize. Over the next few days, my father acquires a new engine and swaps out the old engine with the new one. We then find out that my brother had taken the car in for some repairs a few days before my trip to dealership, and it was one of the hoses they worked on that came off.

My father is in contact with the dealership, but they say they are not at all at fault and refuse any kind of compensation. So, my father decides to take them to small claims court.

After a few months, we are all at the courthouse. The judge comes in and the case is read to her. As soon as the dealership’s name is mentioned, the judge asks for the lawyers — both ours and the dealership’s — to come forward and have a private discussion. This seems very odd, but all we can do is wait for our lawyer to come back and tell us what’s going on.

After a few minutes, our lawyer comes back with a smile on her face. Apparently, the judge is also having “issues” with the dealership, so she has to remove herself due to a conflict of interest. We can’t believe it.

Once the judge has officially removed herself from the case, the dealership settles for everything we wanted.

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