I am a female engineer, and part of my job involves going to the various construction sites for my projects to inspect work and attend meetings. Please note that in my area, white hardhats are worn only by supervisors, inspectors, and engineers — basically anyone with authority on the site. All other personnel wear other coloured hardhats.

One day, I am walking up to the site dressed in regular “civilian” clothing. When I get to the gate, I stop and start rummaging in my bag to get out my construction gear. As I do so, a construction worker in a yellow hat sees me and starts wolf-whistling, trying to catch my eye. I don’t say anything, but pull out my white hat and plop it on my head. His eyes go wide, and I hear a quiet “Oh, s***!” as he scrambles out of sight.

I spent four hours on site, but didn’t see him for the rest of my visit.

(I am trying to get into a bar and the bouncer has stopped me to check my ID.)

Bouncer: “Is this you? It doesn’t look like you”

Me: “It’s really me.”

Bouncer: “What is your name?”

(I tell him.)

Bouncer: “What is your address?”

(I tell him.)

Bouncer: “What is your birthdate?”

(I tell him.)

Bouncer: “What colour are your eyes?”

(I start to answer but he interrupts.)

Bouncer: “Wait, no cheating!” *he covers my eyes with his hand*

Me: “Wait, did you just cover my eyes so I can’t see what colour they are?”

Bouncer: “Yes.”

(I was just recently diagnosed with pretty severe asthma. This winter, I start feeling odd in my chest whenever I breathe, and it’s causing me great anxiety, so I go to my GP.)

Me: “Whenever I breathe my chest feels odd, and it’s difficult to get deep breaths.”

Doctor: “So, don’t breathe; problem solved.”

Me: *awkward laugh* “Yeah, I guess so, but I was hoping for a more permanent solution.”

Doctor: “Take your inhaler.”

Me: “Yes, I am, but it doesn’t help.”

Doctor: “So, don’t breathe.”

(I ended up walking out and going to the ER. It wasn’t life-threatening and they just told me to take something over-the-counter medicine for a month, and to avoid going outside in extremely cold weather.)

(While looking for an elective course, I am very excited to find one on fairy tales. While going to sign up for said course, I pass a girl explaining it to her friend:)

Girl: “I’m going to be doing Fairy Tales, so that’s, like, Santa Claus.”

(I chose a film course instead.)

(Our restaurant changes the prices in our menu yearly, and mails out a bunch of recent copies in early- to mid-January. It is now April. I have just taken an order over the phone and given the woman her total, when she insists I’ve done it wrong. I double-check, and my total is correct.)

Customer: “Are you sure? I added it up to [amount at least four dollars off].”

Me: “I don’t know what to tell you, ma’am; I’ve added it up twice and gotten [correct amount]. Are you sure you have this year’s menu? Prices have changed a little bit.”

Customer: “I ordered from this menu just the other week.”

(I start to ask the price of one of the items in her menu, to verify, but she just keeps talking.)

Customer: “Like, it shouldn’t be that much. The [item] is [price].” *this price is 30 cents less than the current price, indicating that her menu is at least three years old*

Me: “Okay, I think I’ve found the problem. That sounds like an old menu.”

Customer: “No, this is the one you mailed to me, and it’s telling me [item] should be [price].”

Me: “Okay, I don’t know how that happened, but the prices are different, and your total is [total].”

(I have spent more time correcting her on the price than actually taking the order, and the call finally ends. I tell my coworker why it took so long, and look up to see another customer at the counter.)

Customer #2: “And the menu even says, ‘Prices are subject to change without notice.’”

Me: “I really appreciate that you actually read that.”