No ID, No Idea, Part 4

, , , | Right | March 1, 2011

(A customer comes to the bar with his parents. He starts to order drinks, but I stop him to ask for his ID.)

Me: “Can I see some ID, please?”

Customer’s Mother: “He doesn’t need it. He’s nineteen.”

Me: “Well, I’m just asking him to prove that.”

Customer: “I don’t have any.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I won’t be able to serve you then.”

Customer’s Father: “Okay. Well, I’ll order then.”

(He orders the same three alcoholic drinks as his son had before.)

Me: “Unfortunately, he will have to have a soft drink.”

Customer’s Father: “What do you mean he can’t have a drink? He’s nineteen! He’s actually a barman, you know!”

Me: “Well, he should really know better then.”

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No ID, No Idea, Part 3

, , , , | Right | February 16, 2011

(A customer is trying to pay with an unsigned card.)

Me: “Ma’am, since your credit card is not signed I will need to see your ID.”

Customer: “Well, I don’t have it. I left it with someone at [Department Store] because they’re signing me up for one of their credit cards. Can’t you just put it through?”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, no. Do you have another form of payment?”

Customer: “Oh, for God’s sake! This is ridiculous! I’ll be right back!” *storms off*

(Because she has already put a gift card toward the purchase, I have to wait several minutes for my busy manager to come and cancel the transaction before I can ring any other customers. The customer’s signature is still on the pad when she returns.)

Customer: “Fine! Here’s my ID! And you left my signature up on the screen for anyone to see!”

Me: “I assure you, no one else approached the register while you were gone.”

Customer: “Someone could have stolen my identity!”

Me: “But you left your ID and social security number with a stranger in another store?”

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Floods Cause A Whole Raft Of Problems

, , , , , | Right | February 11, 2011

(Queensland is suffering major flooding throughout the state. I’m tracking a customer’s order that was placed last week and still hasn’t arrived.)

Me: “Okay, I’ve tracked your order with our courier. Unfortunately, due to flooding there are a lot of road closures which is why your order has not been delivered.”

Customer: “But it’s not even raining that much, and the water isn’t that high in the streets.”

Me: “I am sorry for any inconvenience but the courier can not risk driving through flood water.”

(Long pause.)

Customer: “So it won’t be here today?”

Me: “Not unless you have a boat.”

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No Civility, No Social Graces, No Service

, , , , , | Right | February 2, 2011

(I am required to ask to see a customer’s credit card and ID if they make a credit purchase over $25.)

Me: “Can I see your card and ID, please, sir?”

Customer: “If my father were here, he’d call you a b****.”

Me: “If your father were here, I’d ask him to leave.”

Customer: *blank stare*

Me: “I don’t tolerate that kind of language. Please leave.”

Customer: *glares at me awhile longer, but eventually leaves the store*

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Stealthy Healthy, Part 2

, , , , | Right | January 14, 2011

(Our fast food outlet just started selling oatmeal yesterday.)

Me: “Welcome to our store. Would you like to try our fruit oatmeal today?”

Customer: “Wait, that actually sounds healthy. I’m confused.”

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