(At our store we ask everyone for their phone number so we can pull up their rewards club information when ringing them up. We are encouraged to get everyone’s number or sign new customers up. By being signed up, customers get access to extra coupons and free store credit for just shopping with us.)

Me: “Find everything okay today, miss?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “All right, can I get your number for the rewards program?”

Customer: “No.”

Me: *checking to make sure she doesn’t already have one* “Are you sure? You get free money for having one, and it takes two seconds to sign you up.”

Customer: *annoyed* “No.”

(I just give up and go to ring her up.)

Me: “Your total is—”

Customer: “I have a coupon.”

(She hands me her phone, showing a coupon she could have only gotten by being a rewards member. Thanks for ruining my stats, lady.)

(I am at school at the beginning of the day. I hear this comical announcement over the PA:)

Announcement: “This is a test announcement because of problems with the speakers in some of the rooms. Please contact the main office if you did not hear this announcement.”

(A customer calls me on the phone in a panic.)

Customer: “Why am I still getting a bill for this line of credit? I thought you closed it! It’s ten pages long! I haven’t used it. “

Me: “I did close it, but I know you had some fraud, so let me call card services to see what’s going on.”

(I call card services.)

Me: “My customer is still showing a balance on her line. We paid it. What’s going on?”

Card Services: “We show no activity, but that card did receive a large payoff a month ago.”

Me: “Well, my customer is still getting a bill with a large balance…”

(I continue to argue with card services for 20 minutes before hanging up in frustration. I call my customer back and say they show no money owed so that statement must just not be printing correctly.)

Me: “Can you read exactly what it says at the top?”

Customer: “’Statement of Accounts’.”

Me: “That is your monthly statement.”

Customer: “Yeah, but it says I owe all this money!”

Me: “That’s your monthly account transactions and balance, not a bill! You don’t owe anything.”

Customer: “Well, why is it so long?!”

Me: “I don’t know, but it’s the same as you get every month; it’s nothing new.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks for checking for me!”

(I just spent thirty minutes arguing with people to find out my customer thought her monthly statement was a bill. I ask more questions now.)

Customer: *brings item up to the front counter* “Hi, I noticed this is broken. Can I get it for half off?”

Me: “Oh, bummer. Were there any others back there on the shelf like it?”

Customer: “No, not of this color. Can I just get this half off?”

Me: “Well, I know for a fact that I have more of those in that color in the back that aren’t broken. I’ll go get one for you.”

Customer: “No, I want this one. Just put it in the computer for half off. It’s broken.”

Me: “I can see that it is. But I can’t take 50% off just because that corner is chipped off, especially since I know I have plenty that aren’t broken. Would you like me to go get one?”

Customer: “If you can’t give me a discount, I don’t want it. Can’t you just type it in?”

Me: “Only managers can do that, and even if I was a manager, the computer only goes to 20% off. But unless it’s the only one left and severely damaged, I can’t do that for you.”

Customer: *tosses (somewhat fragile) item onto counter* “Whatever.”

(When I went back to where the items are displayed, there were three more on the shelf just like the one she had brought up, same color and all. She must have looked through to find the specific broken one, or maybe even broke it herself in hopes of getting a discount!)

(I work at the jewelry counter. A man approaches with an ad.)

Customer: *points at some opal jewelry in the ad* “Where are these?”

Me: *walks him over* “They are right here. It looks like we only have the ring and earrings. The necklace has been sold. We do have a similar, slightly cheaper opal with necklace and earrings though right here.”

Customer: *points to the ones in the ad again* “Where are these ones?”

Me: “Right here, sir.”

Customer: “And how much would they be for both pieces?”

Me: “It would be $210 plus tax for the both of them?”

Customer: “Okay, make me a deal.”

Me: “Um… it’s $210 plus tax.”

Customer: “No, I mean, what can you do for me? I want a deal.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. They’re already 60% off. They are $210 plus tax.”

Customer: “Call over a manager. I want you to make me a deal. You say $200 even and I’ll take both.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but the price is firm. There are no more discounts.”

Customer: “Make it $200 even and you got a deal. [Company] needs to empower its employees to make deals.”

Me: “I’m sorry. The price is firm. I don’t know any retail environment that we can negotiate. I’ve worked retail for six years now.”

Customer: “Well, I’ve been doing this for 50 years.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir. The price is $210 plus tax.”

Customer: “Ok, I’ll take the earrings. You just lost a sale.”

(I rang him up and he left. I’m really curious what stores he goes to that he can get away with that. If it was marked wrong or there was any good reason he should get a discount, I could have easily adjusted for him. It may have only been a small difference, but it’s the principal. You’re already getting a good deal. Take it and be happy. No need to be difficult and demand more than anyone else.)