They Have Everything You Want Except Everything You Want
Fast Food, Drive-Thru, Ohio, USA
Us: “Can we get a ten-piece chicken nugget value meal please?”
Employee On The Intercom: “I’m sorry, we’re out of chicken nuggets right now.”
Us: “Then we’ll take a [Burger] with cheese.”
Employee: “I’m sorry, we’re out of [Burger] patties, too.”
Us: “What DO you have?”
Employee: “Everything but nuggets and [Burger] patties!”
(I work on a roller coaster where the height requirement is 48″. If we think a guest is under the height requirement, they can’t ride. This particular day, I notice a little girl in high platform sandals is boarding. I approach her and her father.)
Me: “Sorry for the inconvenience, but do you mind if we check your daughter’s height?”
Guest: “Sure, but I paid for an adult ticket.”
(I take the little girl to the height scale and have her remove her shoes. I measure her barefoot, and she’s way too short.)
Me: “I’m sorry, but it doesn’t look like she’s tall enough to ride. If you want to stay on, she can wait in the kiddie corral—”
Guest: “She’s tall enough! You can’t make her take her shoes off!”
Me: “I’m sorry, sir. That’s the company policy.”
Guest: “Measure her again! She’s tall enough! I paid for an adult ticket!”
(At this point, my supervisor comes over.)
Supervisor: “Sir, the height scale showed that she isn’t tall enough to ride. For her safety, she has to be 48 inches.”
Guest: “Your f****** employee made her take her shoes off! That’s not fair! I paid for an ADULT TICKET!”
Supervisor: “Sir, the tickets are based on age and not height. If you continue to cause a scene, we’ll have to call security.”
Guest: “F*** THIS RIDE! C’mon, honey, let’s go ride the Banshee!”
(The Banshee has a height requirement of 54″. The guest stormed off screaming about an adult ticket.)
This story is part of our Roller-Coasters roundup!
One of the local pizza chains (which I’d been ordering from twice a month or so for years, and the only complaint I had was that they sometimes delivered too fast and I had to oven the pizza for a few minutes) was sending deals via (opt-in) text message, and one of these was insanely good. I don’t remember the details, but it worked out to something like 60% off. I online-ordered ten pizzas for a party.
The pizza arrived, and the driver demanded to know where I got the code, and when I refused to pull out my phone to show him the message (I was trying to juggle ten large pizzas, money, and assorted sides at the time, and the phone was in the other room), he responded with, “That’s what I thought. My manager told me to tell you never to pull that s*** again.”
The food was perfectly fine, but I was filling out the complaint form before the driver reached the main street. Never got a reply back — but when I ordered again a few weeks later, the driver (who I’d never seen before) was visibly terrified, and I found out that this was because, “last time we delivered to this house, three or four people got fired.”
(I am a cashier at [Fast Food Restaurant]. I’m not feeling so hot this day. I’ve been putting up with a lot of back pain for the last two weeks, so I’m not as upbeat as I normally am, but I’m still really polite with my customers. This woman and her four kids come in, and they place a huge order.)
Me: *after reading back the entire order* “Okay. For here, that’ll be $26.14.” *trying to remember to smile*
(The customer hands me $30, and as I’m counting out her change, she tells me she has a quarter.)
Me: “Oh, okay.”
(I adjust my posture, trying to negate my back pain, and hold my hand out to receive her quarter.)
Customer: “Oh, you got an attitude problem. You don’t like how I count my change.”
Me: “Ugh… I…”
Customer: “Okay. I want a refund. Kids, we’re going to [Other Restaurant].”
(I literally didn’t say anything else to her. I gave her a sideways look and got my manager. At first, my manager took the customer’s side and went to write me up. The manager left me in the office for ten minutes while she went to get the customer’s complaint. When my manager came back to the office, she apologized and told me to get back to work. Apparently, at least two customers and a coworker pleaded with my manager, and told her that I didn’t do anything wrong. I came back just in time to see the customer’s kids looking extremely confused as they walked out. This isn’t an uncommon scenario, either.)
(I’m at the library, minding my own business, when a man old enough to be my father approaches me. He’s not a total stranger; we have seen each other at the library before. We’ve even had the basic, “Hi, how’s the weather?” conversation the previous week, but nothing beyond that. Note that we haven’t said a single word to each other this day.)
Man: “Hey, here’s my number, [phone number]. And don’t forget it.”
Me: “Um… okay.”
Man: “So, what about dinner at [Local Restaurant]?”
Me: “I don’t date.”
Man: “What? Hate men or something?”
Me: “No. I’m asexual. I’m not into dating anyone.”
Man: “Oh. Coffee, then?”
(This is far from the only conversation I’ve had with men old enough to be my father. Without fail, even after telling them I don’t date, they ask me out for coffee. They don’t even seem to care enough about me to know I don’t drink coffee [I’m a tea drinker]. And this has happened over a half a dozen times.)
