(It is the early 80s, the days of 55 mph speed limits and 15 mpg cars. I live in Harlingen, TX, which is in the far south of Texas near the border with Mexico. I am on the phone to a company executive from New Jersey.)

Exec: “Some of us are flying to Dallas for a conference next week, and we thought we’d rent a car and pop down to your office to visit on our free day.”

Me: “Well, you’ll need at least two days, preferably three.”

Exec: “Why? It’s a pretty small office, isn’t it?”

Me: “Yes, but Dallas is well over 500 miles away. You’re looking at ten hours of driving each way, not counting stops for food or gas.”

Exec: “But… it’s in the same state.”

(I’m the assistant for the technical director of an international phone company. On this particular day she comes in with a bemused expression and a huge vase of flowers in her hands.)

Me: “Oh, that’s pretty; who are those from?”

Director: “One of the Vice Presidents, for Secretary Appreciation Day, apparently.”

Me: “What?!”

Director: “Yeah, darndest thing. I was on my way to a meeting on the executive floor and he came by with this cart of flowers. He saw me and handed me this, saying he wanted to make sure all secretaries from every floor got included.”

Me: “Wait… he thought you were a secretary?”

Director: “So it appears. Guess since he only comes by our branch every once in a while, and I’m female, didn’t do anything with my hair and wear glasses, I ticked enough of the stereotype boxes for him.”

Me: “So… did you correct him?”

Director: “Nah, I think I’ll wait till our weekly meeting when he’s due to sit with the other directors. Let everyone see the look on his face when the truth comes out.”

(Later that week she came in to find a new $500 dollar designer purse on her desk, with a huge card of apology sticking out of it.)

(I have this one coworker who’s always giving me a hard time over my love of movies. This conversation broke out as I’m getting ready for the premiere day of a blockbuster I’d been looking forward to.)

Coworker: “I can’t believe you’re going to the theatre to see it. In this day and age, you can download anything you want for free. Only an IDIOT still pays for entertainment.”

Me: “How are you spending your Christmas vacation again?”

Coworker: “I’m flying down to San Francisco to watch my 49ers play!”

Me: “And how much is that costing you?”

Coworker: “Around $8000.”

Me: “And how is that NOT paying for entertainment?”

Coworker: “Sports are different. With sports, there are fans there that you can hang out with! Each game is a one-time only event.”

Me: “This is the premiere. There’s going to be fans there I can hang out with. It is a one-time only event.”

Coworker: “Whatever. Movies are the lowest form of entertainment. All you do is look at pictures in the dark for two hours.”

Me: “With football, all you do is watch grown men chase a ball for four hours.”

Coworker: “SPORTS… ARE… DIFFERENT!”

(At work we discuss popular movies. One of my coworkers is a big Disney fan. At that time “Frozen” has come out.)

Coworker: “Disney is really improving on the gender roles in the movie, so the men are sometimes weak and needs to be saved by a woman, or women have different connections than they used to be. I think it is something special that a woman is not only the lead but the hero, too. Like in Frozen.”

Me: “What is so special about it, having a woman be a hero? That’s normal. And Disney had movies which had female heroes and leads. Besides, in the original story it is also a woman, Gerda in that case, who is looking for Kai and is rescuing him from the snow queen.”

Colleague: “[My Name], please be quiet and don’t reveal everything. I haven’t seen the movie yet.”

Me: “Neither have I. I am just retelling the fairy tale the movie is based on.”

Colleague: “What fairy tale?”

Me: “’The Snow Queen’ by Hans Christian Andersen.”

Colleague: “There is a fairy tale?”

(My boss calls me into a private meeting and accuses me of wasting time which, I assure him, I have not. Please note that I’m a pretty sensitive person and don’t handle confrontation well.)

Me: *starting to get upset*

Boss: “Well, do you have anything you’d like to say to me?”

Me: “Couldn’t we have had this meeting literally any other day?”

Boss: “I don’t have magic powers to know when a good day for you is.”

(I guess he’d forgotten that that morning I had asked him for the next day off because I had to get my dog put to sleep due to terminal cancer.)