We have had a new counselor start with our agency who is one of the most socially awkward people I have ever met. She asks inappropriate questions, talks about weird topics, and is just generally odd.

Our agency has two separate locations that meet weekly for meetings. My husband works on one team and I work on the other. We are very conscious about not showing that we are together and at the max, we occasionally sit next to each other. While we don’t just come out and tell new hires we are married, most people figure it out due to us having the same last name.

The new hire is in our boss’s office when I walk by and she asks me a question.

New Hire: “Hey, [My Name], are you and [My Husband] having an affair?”

I stop and for a moment I’m unsure what to say. My boss is momentarily stunned, as well. I finally manage a response.

Me: “Uh, no. We’re actually married. To each other.”

[New Hire] thinks for a moment.

New Hire: “Oh, okay. That makes a lot more sense. I saw you sitting next to each other at the meeting.”

My boss was trying really hard not to laugh and waved me out of her office. I heard her telling [New Hire] that that was a “completely inappropriate” thing to ask.

My husband found it hysterical, as did our coworkers. I’ve been asked many times if my husband and I are together, but never like that!

I work at a movie production office in Canada.

US Movie Producer: “Can you please get me a case of La Croy?”

Me: “Of… what?”

US Movie Producer: “La Croy.”

Me: “I don’t know what that is.”

He pulls out a drink can of LaCroix and holds it up.

Me: “That’s La Croix.”

US Movie Producer: “No. It’s pronounced La Croy.”

We go back and forth for a bit until he pulls up the drink’s website which says, “La-CROY. It rhymes with ‘enjoy’.”

Me: “Well, it’s in our national anthem, so I’m going to stick with La Croix.”

My company has been going through some dramatic restructuring. I’m in a coworker’s office going over some work I’m helping him with and what projects we need to look at in the new year. Our boss pops her head in.

Me: “We’re pretty much done here if you need him.”

Boss: “No, that’s fine. I’m just having a panic attack.”

Coworker: “I also want to have a panic attack after talking about everything we need to do this year.”

Me: “Me, too. Should we sit in here and have a panic attack meeting, then?”

We all laughed the hysterical laughter of the damned.

I worked for a humongously large corporation. However, [HLC] experienced a bad few years. There were several employee layoffs, and [HLC] was not the moneymaker it used to be.

My manager’s manager’s manager evidently decided to try to boost our morale, which was in the gutter. He gave each of us an end-of-year bonus: a book of ten 50-cent [Fast Food Place] coupons. Total value: five dollars.

To this day, I am not sure if I should have been grateful or insulted.

I work in a tax office as a receptionist. I can’t prepare taxes; I just answer phone calls and set appointments. I get this call one day.

Me: “Thank you for calling [Tax Office]. How can I help you today?”

Caller: “Yes, I need to speak to [Tax Preparer]. You just hung up on me.”

I’ve only had one phone call this morning, and it wasn’t from him.

Me: “Oh, okay. She’s actually with a client right now; can I take a message?”

Caller: “No, I need to know—” *mumbles incoherently*

Me: “I’m sorry, what was that?”

Caller: “I dropped off my taxes and I—” *mumbles*

Me: “So, you need to pick up?”

Caller: “No, I need to know—” *mumbles*

Me: “I’m sorry, but I can’t understand what you’re saying.”

Caller: “Hang up on me. Like you did last time. I’ll keep calling until I can talk to [Tax Preparer].”

Me: “I’m sorry, but she’s with a client now and won’t be free until around 11:30.”

It’s now 9:30.

Caller: “Well, I need to know—” *mumbles* “—What’s going on?”

Me: “Sir, I have no idea what your tax status is. I’m just a receptionist, and our only tax pro is with somebody right now.”

Caller: “Fine. Hang up on me. You already did that. I’ll file somewhere else.”

Me: “Okay, you have a wonderful day!”

Be kind to your office staff! Their hands are tied most of the time.