But That’s How Calendars Work?

, , , , | Working | February 13, 2020

(Recently, I’ve been attending a series of presentations given by a coworker who happens to have a cube near mine. Today, I get an email from him that off-handedly mentions him giving a class this afternoon, which surprises me, so I stand up to talk to him over the cube wall.)

Me: “Hey, [Coworker #1], are you doing a training thing this afternoon? I don’t have an invite for it on my calendar.”

Coworker #1: “Huh, that’s weird; it should’ve sent one to you. I’ll send you a new one.”

(The coworker that sits on my other side, who was not involved in this brief exchange, speaks up in the most mocking, condescending voice possible:)

Coworker #2: “What, you can’t figure out where to go without a meeting invite? You need your calendar to tell you where to be?”

Me: “Well… yeah, I didn’t know we had a training session this afternoon. If I don’t have an invitation, I won’t know to be there.”

Coworker #2: “Yeah… well…” *grumbles under his breath*

(I have no idea why it was so offensive to him for me to want to have my schedule written down!)

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Look Hu’s Talking

, , , , , | Working | February 11, 2020

(I have just gotten a new officemate who is also new to the company. He knows people on our team well enough but is still learning names from other teams that we have to collaborate with. He is attempting to send an email to someone on a particular project.)

Officemate: “What’s Albert’s last name?”

Me: “Hu.”

Officemate: “Albert. He works on the [Project]…”

Me: *sensing the spirits of Abbott and Costello disturbed and rising from their graves to haunt us* “His name is Albert Hu. H-U.”

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This Report Is About To Pop  

, , , , | Working | February 10, 2020

(We have a report with the acronym “CHRY” which we often refer to as the “cherry.” It’s deadline day, so I am making my rounds for the departments who have yet to submit theirs. I walk into the commercial administrator’s office and notice she is with someone I don’t recognise.)

Me: “Oops, sorry to interrupt. Is your cherry ready?”

Commercial Admin: “It will be soon, just—”

Commercial Manager: “Excuse me?”

Commercial Admin: “Oh, this is [My Name], the site manager. And this is [Commercial Manager], the commercial manager for [Site in Central Scotland].”

Commercial Manager: “What did you just ask this woman?

Me: “It’s a report. The deadline is today.”

Commercial Manager: “No. I’m pretty sure you just asked her if she’s had her cherry popped!”

(The commercial admin and I share a glance.)

Commercial Admin: “I can assure you, he did not. Look, it’s probably easier…”

(She logs into her PC and the report comes up.)

Commercial Admin: “See—” *points at the header* “C H R Y…”

Commercial Manager: “I don’t see what that has to do with virginity!”

Commercial Admin: “No. CHRY, it spells cherry. We call this report the cherry. He was asking me if I’d finished my part of the report.”

(It finally clicks and the manager starts blushing.)

Commercial Manager: “Oh… I guess this happens a lot with new people?”

Commercial Admin: *before I can sympathetically agree* “No, you’re the first.”

(I later received the report with a note saying the commercial manager apologised for the accusation. Our admin later confirmed that the manager was adamant nothing she did was wrong, neither with the misunderstanding, nor the accusation, but after talking she agreed to let our admin apologise for her. Apparently, this is how she operates; anything wrong is swiftly denied and ignored. She must be murder to work with.)

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Putting On A Brave Font

, , , , , , , | Working | February 10, 2020

I’ve been at my current office for coming up two years now and I like the environment. I suffer from dyslexia but have purchased a dyslexic-friendly font, a font converter, and a specific reader so my disability is barely noticeable as I work.

The only annoyance I really suffer is one coworker who prints out everything she emails me and puts it on my desk. I have hit close to twenty times telling her that I have great difficulty reading normal font on normal paper. I have shown her her email in my reader, too, so that she can see I have it. I have sent her the font so that she could print what she wants me to have in a text I can read, but nothing. 

Today, I picked up the sheet as she put it on my desk and dropped it straight into the recycle bin behind me, barely breaking eye contact as I did. She was shocked and annoyed, but I told her that that’s what would happen to every sheet of paper she put on my desk from now on.

I can’t wait to see what happens when I get my next email from her.

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Unfiltered Story #185644

, , , | Unfiltered | February 9, 2020

I am a taxi driver. I had a passenger who seems to be in hurry. He is running towards my cab.

Passenger : Please take me to Balboa Ave.
**I did not move. We are in Balboa Ave.
Passenger : Didn’t you f****** hear me?! Take me to Balboa Ave!
Me : We are in Balboa Ave. sir.
Passenger : Oh, please take me to [Corporate Office]
**Again, I did not move. We are in front of the Corporate Office that he wants to go to.
Passenger : F*** you! I am in a hurry! Take me to [Corporate Office] right now!
Me : Sir please look at your right side

**he sees the office and with a red face he left my cab without thanks.