Red (Folder) Alert!

, , , , | Right | September 18, 2020

I work for an office supply store. I’m packing our truck when something sounds a bit off. I see a customer, in his forties, opening boxes of plastic file folders, five of four different colors per box. He has a bunch of red file folders out of a box and is trying to close up the boxes.

Me: “Hi. Would you like help with anything?”

Customer: “No, thanks. I’m fine.”

After a brief pause:

Me: “Just out of curiosity, why do you have some folders out of the box, and why are you closing up the boxes?”

Customer: “Oh, I just want all red folders, so I’m swapping them out with the other boxes.”

Me: “I’m sorry, but you can’t do that.”

Customer: “I can’t?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but no. That’s technically stealing since other customers will want the different colors on the box, so I would have to damage them out. We do sell the plastic folders individually, though, in aisle nine. I’ll help you once I get this all sorted out.”

The customer wandered off as I fixed the three boxes he’d opened, making sure the count was right. By the time I got to the aisle to help out he was nowhere to be seen. Must have found the right items all on his own.

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And Get Her A Couple Of Quills While You’re At It

, , , , | Right | August 5, 2020

The phone rings and I answer. There’s an older woman on the other end.

Customer: “Hello? I wanna see if y’all carry, uh… ink.”

Me: “Sure! What brand of ink are you looking for?”

Customer: “It’s for my printer.”

Me: “Yes, but what brand?”

Customer: “Oh. It’s [Brand], and the box says [model number].”

Me: “All right, and you said that was ink and not toner, right?”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “You’re sure it’s ink and not toner, ma’am?”

Customer: “I said ink!

We don’t carry ink cartridges by that particular brand, but we do carry toner. I put the customer on hold and use our store’s stock search function to determine if we carry the type of toner she needs. Unfortunately, we do not.

Me: “Ma’am, unfortunately, we do not carry that particular cartridge.”

Customer: “Cartridge?! I said ink!

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Unfiltered Story #199813

, | Unfiltered | June 30, 2020

Customer: I need a pen refill!

Me: Ok, they’re in aisle 5 and I’ll send someone over to meet you down there.

Customer: oh! Which one’s aisle 5?

Me: Um, that one over there…. with the… 5 over it…

Unfiltered Story #195822

, , | Unfiltered | June 2, 2020

I have a small cut in the middle of my forearm. It isn’t too big, but still noticeable.
Me: (scans items and places them in the bag)
Customer: That cut (gesturing to my arm) is that from shooting up heroine?
Me: (super shocked, but don’t show the customer that) No, its from my dog.
I told my manager who laughed. I am the most innocent looking 19 year old girl who hasn’t even had alcohol, let alone heroine.

Unfiltered Story #193993

, | Unfiltered | May 14, 2020

(A MAJOR thunderstorm is moving through the area: torrential downpours and even some hail. Lightning has recently struck a transformer near our store, knocking out the power. Shortly after, our emergency generator kicks in to keep the lights running, but since the Internet is down our registers are offline and essentially useless. It is still storming when a customer starts banging on the closed doors.)

Customer: We have a heavy photocopier in our car we want to return. Can someone come help us bring it in?

Me: Unfortunately we’ve just lost power and all of our registers are down right now. We don’t know when they’ll come back on, so we can’t process a return right now.

Customer: But the lights are on, you must have power.

Me: We’re running off a generator to keep the lights on, but it doesn’t power the network our registers run on.

(At this point my manager comes up behind me.)

Customer: So I dragged this heavy box all the way here in the pouring rain and you won’t return it?

Manager: It’s not that I WON’T return it, it’s that I CAN’T. It’s out of my hands.

Customer: Well I am VERY unimpressed with your customer service. I can’t believe you made me drag it ALL the way here from (town about 30 minutes away). This is ridiculous!

(The customer continued to stand and argue with us for another half hour before we finally closed for good. They left with the photocopier, still telling us all about how “horrendous” our customer service was.)