A Pen-chant For Being Lazy

, , , | Right | October 13, 2018

Customer: “I need a pen refill.”

(I’m working cash, so I can’t leave the register to help him.)

Me: “Okay, they’re in aisle five, and I’ll page someone to meet you over there.”

(The customer stares at me, looking confused.)

Me: “Is that okay?”

Customer: “I want a pen refill!”

Me: “Yes, okay. They’re in aisle five, and I can get someone to meet you there and give you a hand.”

(The customer continues to stare at me, all confused.)

Me: “Do you want me to get someone to help you?”

Customer: “I just want a refill for my pen!”

Me: “Okay… Right. So… They’re located in aisle five. If you walk down to aisle five, I’ll make sure someone meets you there… to help you.”

Customer: “Oh, I have to get it myself, do I?”

Literally Showing Them The Door

, , , , , | Right | October 11, 2018

(I work in a popular office supply store, which also has a copy center. It is not unheard of for a customer to pay for copies at regular checkout. This takes place right after open. The store has one very obvious door for enter and exit.)

Customer: “How do I get out?”

(I think she means, “check out,” since we are about five feet from the door.)

Me: “Do you need to be checked out?”

Customer: “No! I already paid. How do I leave?”

Me: *gesturing at door* “You can just walk out.”

(I told my manager; she didn’t believe me.)

Unfiltered Story #122765

, , | Unfiltered | October 8, 2018

A customer requested a dry erase board which we keep in the warehouse. I send an employee to bring out a 3′ by 4′ dry erase board, which I knew we had in stock.

After several long minutes I try to find the employee I sent. I find him by the boards looking at them funny. I ask him if he found the 3 by 4 boards to which he responded, “No, all I can find are these 36″ by 48″.” All I could do was Facepalm.

Stupidity Is Its Own Reward, Part 5

, , , , | Right | October 1, 2018

(I am working at a national chain office supply store. There is a rewards card that gives points for each purchase, which earns special coupons, gift cards, etc. that are sent to the customer’s account. In order to use the rewards, customers have to either print the email or show it on their phone. Customers can look up their accounts on the website and they get email notifications when rewards are sent. It is against company policy for employees to access rewards accounts for customers. A customer is at the checkout, about to pay for furniture she is buying.)

Me: “…and your total is [amount].”

Customer: “Oh, no, I have my rewards card.”

(She hands me her card, and I scan it to apply the points to her account, then hand it back to her. She just stands there for a bit, so I repeat:)

Me: “Your total is [same amount].”

Customer: “What? I gave you my rewards card. Why didn’t the discount apply?”

Me: “Oh, sorry for the confusion. It’s not a discount card. When I scan it, the points from this purchase go to your account.”

Customer: “I know, but I think I have rewards to use.”

Me: “Do you have them with you?”

Customer: *getting annoyed* “NO! You SCANNED the CARD!”

Me: “Right, but the computer doesn’t read what rewards you have available. It just gives you the points from this transaction. If you got an email saying you have rewards to use, you can print it off, or show it on your phone if you have a smartphone.”

Customer: “No, thanks. You can just look it up for me.”

Me: “I’m not authorized to access your account.”

Customer: *smiling like it has suddenly become clear* “OHHH, okay! I authorize you.”

Me: “I mean I’m not allowed to because corporate says so; I could lose my job. And even if I was allowed, this computer isn’t able to do that.”

(It’s a computer that is only connected to the store’s internal network, not the Internet, and it is basically a cash register.)

Customer: “Fine! I’ll just go to [Competitor]!”

(A coworker and I had taken the furniture, which was very heavy, off of a high shelf from the back room and carried it up to the register at this customer’s request, so after she stormed out without buying it, we had to put it back.)

Comes In All Colors Except Colored

, , , , , | Right | September 27, 2018

(I’m a black man walking up to a customer in the ink area. She seems to need help finding the cartridge for her printer.)

Me: “Ma’am, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Yeah, I need black ink.” *takes one look at me and points to the skin on my arm* “I need this color!”

Me: *trying my best to hide my irritation* “Sorry, ma’am, we don’t sell brown ink.”

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