Entitlement Can Be Found On Every Aisle

| MI, USA | Awesome Workers, Crazy Requests

(Working as a cashier for four years has taught me a great deal of patience, but one particular woman always tries to cause a huff when she comes into the store. Today, however, we are short staffed. I am at my register and can not leave the front end, my manager is unloading the truck by himself in the back of the store, and we have one person working in the print department, who also can not leave her station, leaving no one working on the floor. It’s beginning to pick up and I notice the offending woman entering the store. From my register I see her quickly pace up and down the front of the store a couple times looking increasingly irate. She turns around to look at me.)

Customer: *suddenly yelling* “Isn’t there anyone working on the FLOOR?”

Me: *having to speak much louder than normal due to the distance between us* “My apologies, ma’am. We are a bit short staffed at the moment, but I will see if someone is available.”

(At this point the customer forcefully sighs and throws her arms in the air but stays where she is. I radio to my manager that the customer needed assistance ASAP. Before I can even finish speaking over the radio she starts up again.)

Customer: *yelling to no one in particular* “I can’t believe there’s no one working on the FLOOR!”

(I radio again to my manager, sounding a bit more desperate to have this lady out of my hair, and try to explain the situation. Eventually my manager comes out from the back and walks right up to the customer.)

Manager: *very calmly and with a smile* “My apologies for the wait, ma’am. I have lots of other customers who think they are the most important thing in the world, too.”

(The customer and I kind of looked at him in shock. She mumbled to him the item she wanted and I rang up the transaction trying very hard not to laugh. She left without another word.)

Not The Sharpest Pair Of Scissors

| OH, USA | Extra Stupid, Language & Words

Customer: “Where’s your skidders at?

Me: “I’m sorry, the what?”

Customer: “Skidders. Skid. Ers. Where they at? I can’t find ’em anywhere.”

Me: “I’m sorry, I can tell you where just about anything in this store is, but I’m not sure I’m familiar with skidders. What are they used for? What do they look like?”

Customer: “Ugh. SKIDDERS! God, you’re dumb.”

Me: “No, I’m not. We just don’t carry skidders here. Sorry.”

Customer: *making a scissoring motion with his fingers* “Skidders! Where. Are. Your. Skidders. You cut paper with ’em. Jesus!”

Me: “Oh, you mean SCISSORS? They’re actually right here. Right in front of you. This whole eight-foot section is nothing but scissors.”

Customer: “Well, I call ’em skidders. God, you’re dumb.”

(How am I supposed to know what you want when you make up your own words for things and can’t see what’s right in front of you?)

Expiration Explanation

| USA | Crazy Requests

(I have a customer who wants to return a task chair she’d purchased for $39.99 because it is broken. She proudly tells me she still has her receipt. It is dated FOUR YEARS earlier.)

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but our return policy is 30 DAYS, and unfortunately the manufacturer’s warranty wouldn’t have been more than a year.”

Customer: *very upset* “Well, I insist you should give me a refund or a new chair. I kept my receipt! I should be able to get a refund or a return since it’s broken!”

Me: “Yes, ma’am, but our return policy is only 30 days and your receipt says you purchased this four years ago.”

(Now, if I bought a chair for $40, sat in it for four years, and it broke, I’d feel like I got my money’s worth, but not this lady.)

Customer: “This is just so unfair! I drove two hours to bring this broken chair back to the store. It’s going to cost me $80 in gas round trip!”

(This was a FORTY DOLLAR chair. Even if we HAD been able to give her a refund, she would have been in the hole forty dollars…)

Can’t Break Free Of The ‘Get One Free’ Cycle

| ON, Canada | Extra Stupid, Money

Customer: “That’s wrong; the photo paper is buy one get one free.”

Me: “It is buy one get one free.”

Customer: “Then why is it coming up at $17?”

Me: “Because that’s how much the photo paper is. It’s $17 each but you got two for $17.”

Customer: “No, it’s $11.”

(I ask my coworker to check the sign for me.)

Customer: “And it’s supposed to be buy one get one free!”

Me: “It is buy one get one free.”

(My coworker calls me to say that the sign says FROM $11 so I explain that to the customer, but he doesn’t understand, so I take him to the aisle to show him.)

Me: “See, this sign advertising the buy one get one free, is saying that the prices START at $11. That doesn’t mean they are all $11. The paper you picked has its own sign here, see? It says it’s $17.”

Customer: “But it says $11 on this sign! They lie!”

Me: “No, it says FROM $11. That means that the photo paper on for Buy One Get One Free is $11 or more. The one you picked is $17.”

Customer: “And it isn’t buy one get one free?”

Me: Yes, it is. All the [Brand] photo paper packs are buy one get one free.”

Customer: “Well which one is $11?”

Me: “The 4×6. You have 8×10.”

Customer: “Fine. I’ll just get one, then.”

Me: “Why would you only get one? It’s buy one get one free.”

Customer: “Because you said it wasn’t!”

Me: “No, I didn’t. I just said that it wasn’t $11.”

Customer: “NO! You told me that the paper I wanted wasn’t buy one get one free!”

Me: “I never once said that. I told you repeatedly that the paper you wanted was still buy one get one free.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, why didn’t you tell me earlier?!”

Tax Is Never Rewarding

| Houston, TX, USA | At The Checkout, Crazy Requests, Money

(A customer is buying two reams of paper for $10.)

Me: “Do you have a rewards card with us, sir?”

Customer: “Yes, I do. My phone is [phone number].”

Me: “Okay, thank you. Your total is $10.83.”

Customer: “Why are you charging me 83 cents?”

Me: *I want to look at him like he’s dumb* “Taxes?”

Customer: “Then what is that rewards card for? Shouldn’t it take off the taxes?”

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