Taxing Faxing About Taxing

| NY, USA | Extra Stupid

(Most companies, including the one I work for, are required to obtain W-9 forms from certain vendors they receive goods/services from. The form simply asks for basic info such as the business’ or independent contractor’s name, address, and tax id/social security number. I need the forms to report certain payments to the IRS at the of the tax year. I’m calling a new vendor that’s in the medical insurance field.)

Me: “Hello, I’m with [Company]. Could you please send me a W-9 form?”

Vendor: “A W-9 form?”

Me: “Yes, please.”

Vendor: “Okay, well, where do I send it to?”

Me: “Can you email it to me?”

Vendor: “Um, can I fax it?”

Me: “Sure, please fax it to [number].”

Vendor: “Okay I will.”

(After somewhat of a long while I see a fax come through. Apparently the person I spoke to thought I randomly called her company to get a blank W-9… as if I couldn’t Google it myself if I wanted a blank one. Didn’t know I had to specify that it should be completed with her company’s details…)


Beginning To Understand Why You Have A Criminal Record

| WI, USA | Criminal & Illegal, Time

(This conversation happens on the telephone at my office.)

Me: “Good afternoon, [Name] Law Offices. Can I help you?”

Client: “Hi, I have a case and need an attorney. I’ve been victimized by the courts. I agreed to a misdemeanor charge, but on my records, it’s recorded as a felony! This is outrageous!”

Me: “Okay, ma’am, the attorney is out right now, but I can make you a consultation appointment. Can I have your name and phone number?”

Client: “Oh… I don’t know. I’m very busy. Maybe if I can call you and see if he is in?”

Me: “Ma’am, the attorney tends to be out quite a bit. It would be best if we could make an appointment.”

Client: “But I’m a victim of an injustice! We can’t let anyone get away with it! How do I know the attorney is worth it?”

Me: “Ma’am, the attorney that specializes in criminal defense is very good. We have people calling from all over our state, and from neighboring states as well. Please, can I have a name and a phone number? We can at least call you back!”

Client: “I don’t know… I’m going to be driving, so I won’t be able to answer my phone. I’ll just call later.”

Me: “Ma’am, can I at least have a name so the attorney can know to anticipate your call?”

Client: “Well… I don’t think so; I don’t want him trying to call me when I’m not available!”

Me: *tearing my hair out* “Ma’am, really, any information would be helpful.”

Client: “No… I’ll just call later… You have a good day.” *click*

Me: *to myself* “Well that was just the biggest waste of time EVER.”

(The kicker? I spent half an hour with this woman, which is worth a great deal of money in billable hours, and I ended up horribly behind on my work. And she NEVER called back!)


Early Bird Gets To Worm Out Of It

| IL, USA | Crazy Requests, Time

(I work in an office that opens every day at eight am. Every day, we have appointments for various functions. Today, we have appointments for people to come in and complete paperwork, which requires that they bring certain documentation, like a photo ID or social security card. The earliest of these appointments if scheduled at 11:45 so that the morning can be spent on regular office duties. As a result, most of the staff, including myself, do not start until 11 am. This happens just as I am coming into work.)

Me: *to my coworker* “Hey, I’m going to start getting set up for our appointments today.”

Coworker: *indicating the only person sitting in our waiting area* “Great. He’s been here since nine am for his appointment.”

(I’m a bit surprised that someone would show up over two hours early for an appointment, but start setting up by myself, since no one else has arrived yet. By the time the rest of the staff arrives to help, I am exhausted from rushing and pause to take a breather and check on the front desk. When I get there, the man approaches the desk.)

Man: “Excuse me, how much longer am I going to have to wait? I was hoping to be done by now.”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, but we’re still getting set up. We’ll be beginning as soon as we can.”

Man: “Can’t someone just help me now? I’ve been waiting for a very long time.”

Me: “Sir, I’m sorry, but we’re not even scheduled to begin taking paperwork until 11:45. That is why we didn’t schedule any appointments until then. Our staff has actually only just gotten here, but we’re working as fast as we can to take you.”

Man: *grumbling as he sits down* “I shouldn’t have to wait. Someone should just be able to help me.”

(Having caught my breath, I leave the desk to check on the rest of the staff, and see that we are just about ready to begin, so I call the front desk to check in the man for his paperwork appointment, about ten minutes early. After waiting five minutes and seeing no sign of him, I go to the front desk to see that he is gone.)

Me: “Hey, where did that guy go?”

Coworker: “Oh, when I told him I could check him in and asked for the documentation, he said that he didn’t have it all. So, I told him he would have to reschedule, or go home to get it. So, he left.”

Me: “He showed up two hours early and didn’t even have everything we asked him to bring?”

Coworker: “That’s not even the worst of it. When he got here at nine, he asked to borrow a pen so he could start filling out the paperwork we gave him three days ago!”

(Let this be a lesson. If you have time to show up early, you have time to make sure you’re prepared!)


Doesn’t Understand The Custom Part Of Customer, Part 9

| Extra Stupid

(I work in customer service in an office. Most of my client interactions are over e-mail.)

Client: “Can you find the instructions for [item]?”

Me: “Certainly, sir.”

Client: *before I e-mail him the instructions* “I think the [item] is broken now. I didn’t buy it from you, but can’t you replace it anyway?”

Me: “No. That’s not the way this works.”

Doesn’t Understand The ‘Custom’ Part Of Customer, Part 8
Doesn’t Understand The ‘Custom’ Part Of Customer, Part 7
Doesn’t Understand The ‘Custom’ Part Of Customer, Part 6


Pest Control And Out Of Control

| FL, USA | Bizarre

(I’m work in the office for a pest control company. Part of my job is to answer phones to schedule or reschedule services for customers. Around four pm every day, our automated system calls customer to remind them of upcoming services dates, so we are inevitably flooded with return calls from people who don’t listen to their messages. Most of the calls are pretty routine, but this one broke the mold in a big way.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company]. This is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “You just called me!”

Me: “That was likely our automated system confirming your next service. Could I have your address to look up your account?”

Customer: “What?! You’re going to have to speak up! It’s loud in the ambulance!”

Me: “Pardon…?”

Customer: “My husband’s on the way to [Local Hospital]! You need to speak up!”

Me: *speaking loudly and quickly, as this is the last response I was expecting* “We were calling to confirm your next service! It’s exterior-only, so you don’t have to be home! Have a nice day, ma’am!”

(I hung up quickly and just stared at my phone in stunned silence as to why someone would prioritize calling back their pest control company over making sure their husband was okay!)

Page 1/1812345...Last