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They Should Have Called Her Eve

, , , , , | Right | January 29, 2021

I receive a call from a dad who wants to add his daughter to his membership. 

Me: “I can certainly add her to your membership. I need her name, date of birth, and phone number.”

Dad: “Her name is [Daughter] and I can find her phone number on my cell right here, just a moment… It’s [number].”

Me: “Thanks, now I only need her date of birth and we’re all set.”

Dad: “Yeah… I don’t remember the exact date. I know her birthday is during winter… Uh, let me think… Yeah, it’s definitely in December. Hold on; I’ll ask my wife.”

I wait for a minute or so and he comes back. 

Dad: “It’s December 31st!”

Me: “Soo… New Year’s Eve?”

Dad: “Yeah, that’s it!”

It happens from time to time that people forget their children’s birthday, but how is it possible to forget when it’s on New Year’s Eve?

NoReply Email Fail

, , , | Right | January 15, 2021

This particular customer has been emailing back and forth with several of my coworkers. He is disputing a charge to his credit card.

Customer: “I’ve emailed you over a month ago to cancel my subscription!”

I take over the case, and he sends me a copy of the email he sent. I take one look and immediately see what the problem is.

Me: “I can see from the information you have sent me that you sent your cancellation to an unmanned email address. This is an address that our system uses to automatically send confirmations and such to customers. Emails sent to this address do not reach our customer service centre.”

Customer: “And that’s my fault?!”

Yes. Yes, it is.

Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 17

, , , | Right | December 28, 2020

I work in a pet store. A middle-aged couple comes in with a rottweiler they obviously don’t control very well.

Since my coworker had an incident with a customer’s rottweiler a few weeks back, I decide to keep my distance while asking if they need any help. They say no; they already know what to buy, as my coworker has already shown them the harness they want.

When it’s time to pay, they make a big fuss.

Female Customer: “We always get a 15% discount on everything in this store, plus we get a 20% discount on backpacks.”

Me: “Why is that?”

Female Customer: *Shrugs* “We just always do, and we’re loyal customers.”

I do not give them the discount, as I have no idea why they’d get one.

Female Customer: “We’re gonna report you to your manager!”

My manager doesn’t hear a thing from them and assures me that nobody in the store gives out any discounts I don’t know about. She doesn’t even know which customers I am talking about, which means they’re not really that regular in our store.

A few weeks later, the same couple walks in with the harness and wants to give it back.

Me: “Hello! How may I assist you today?”

They just wave me off as they are heading for the dog food. I reckon that they don’t want any help and stay put behind the counter. 

When they come up to me to return the harness and buy the dog food, I give them a credit note with their remaining balance, as is our store’s policy, and since they claim they are regulars, I reckon it’s not a big deal as they will spend this money in our store anyway. 

They both totally snap at me at the same time.

Female Customer: “You need to learn the rules! You’re breaking the law by giving us a credit note instead of our money back! And you! You’ve never once asked us if we needed assistance; you’re just always hanging around behind the counter doing nothing!

Then they both angrily walk out while saying stuff like, “She doesn’t fit in in this store!” All the other customers all of whom have been offered assistance, look shocked. 

Then, the husband comes back in, points his finger at me, and yells:

Male Customer: “When is your boss back at work?!”

Me: “My boss works from nine to three every weekday. She also answers messages on our Facebook page.”

Male Customer: “Then we’ll be back on Monday to talk to her and make this right! And we’ll be sure to tell her how you’re behaving!”

Me: “Okay?”

He stomped out again. 

Of course, I called my boss to prepare her for a very blue Monday. Monday came, Monday went, nothing. Not a word. When I talked to her later, she told me, “Yeah, sometimes customers try to do that to those working in the evening; they just try to scare them in order to get their money back or a discount. Sometimes people fall for it, and when they don’t, they get yelled at.”

We haven’t seen them since.

Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 16
Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 15
Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 14
Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 13
Don’t Discount The Customer’s Ability To Discount, Part 12

Hitting You Over And Over With The Same Request Is Battery

, , , | Right | December 7, 2020

I’m on my last few days in the store where I work — a very popular store that sells a lot of electronics. In walks a customer with a battery he bought yesterday and a receipt.

Customer: “I want to trade this battery for a new one; it’s 12v and 5ma, looks like these, and it’s hanging over there.”

The customer points to a wall directly behind him.

Customer: “Is that okay?”

Me: “Yes, of course. Since you know exactly which one you want, you can just find it and I can do the return.”

Customer: “It’s right there.”

He points behind himself again without even turning around.

The register is pretty long, like it’s a little walk for me to go around, and then I’d have to go to the wall behind the customer and find a battery that I’m not sure is right. The customer has every opportunity to just turn around and find the one he wants. I can usually follow the customer around and help them find what they want if they’re unsure, but if they know what they’re after, it’s a lot easier for them to just grab it themselves.

I look at him for a second.

Me: “Okay, you wanted ones that were almost identical to these?”

Customer: “That’s what I just said! And they have to be 12v and 5ma! They’re right there!*Gestures*

I walk around the register and look at the wall to try and find identical ones that are 12v.

Me: “Okay, I can see at least one pair here.”

Customer: *Talking loudly from the register* “They’re there! They need to be 12v and 5ma! You should be able to see them!”

I walk back and put the ones I found on the desk in front of him.

Me: “These are the ones I found that matched your description, but unfortunately, they don’t say how much ma they have.”

Customer: “That’s stupid. They should say; it always says on the batteries in the other stores!”

I think, “Why are you not at the other stores, then?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but that’s all we have at the moment.”

Customer: *After complaining for a while* “Fine, I’ll take the risk.”

Me: “Great, and because it’s a return and a new buy, the system would like your name and number, please?”

Customer: “What? Oh, you need my info? You need my social security, as well? My fingerprint?”

The rest of the transaction went fine, though the customer was still being rude and sarcastic. I am still happy, knowing I’ve only got two more days in this place.

There Is Non-Existent Room For Improvement

, , , , | Right | December 4, 2020

This happens when we are remodeling the third floor at our hotel. It is important to mention that, at this stage, all the rooms on this floor have no fabrics (e.g. linens, towels, curtains, etc.) and no locks on the doors. However, the beds and mattresses have already been installed.

A guest who is looking very tired and smelling quite a bit like last night’s alcohol comes down to check out.

Guest: “I want to check out, and I want to complain that I was woken up very early by a construction worker that suddenly walked into my room!”

I am a bit shocked.

Me: “I am terribly sorry to hear that! That certainly has never happened before! Please, what was your room number?”

Guest: “Number 310.”

Me: “Are you quite sure about that number, sir? The third floor is currently not in use; perhaps it was number 510?”

Guest: *Suddenly insulted*No! I was in 310! I would know my room number, don’t you think? I am not stupid!”

Me: “Of course, sir. Again, I apologize. I will have our hotel manager talk to the construction crew manager about their employee immediately since this is not supposed to happen. What was your last name, sir?”

Guest: “Mr. [Guest], and I am not after any compensation, but you really should speak to them.”

Me: “I will investigate the matter immediately, sir. Again, my apologies, and thank you for letting us know.”

I check our system and it shows that he was checked into room 512. But since his stay was already prepaid by his employer, I simply check him out and he leaves the lobby. A few minutes later, he comes back; he seems quite upset.

Guest: “I don’t have my wallet or my wedding ring!”

Me: “Oh, dear. I will have a housekeeper check your room immediately.”

Guest: “I bet that construction worker has stolen it!”

Me: “I am sure that is not the case. Do you want to wait here while we check?”

Guest: “No, I have some other things to do now but I will come back soon! You’d better find it! If you don’t find it, I will call the police!”

Me: “I am sure we will be able to locate your items, sir.”

The guest leaves again and a housekeeper immediately checks room 512 but finds nothing; in fact, the room seems unused. On a hunch, I ask her to check 310. What do we find there? Yes, his wallet and wedding ring are on the floor under the bed! This guy just slept a full night in a room with no curtains, no locks on the door, and no blankets or pillows on a bare mattress. He couldn’t even take a shower because there were no towels or soap dispensers installed yet. Presumably, he was too drunk to notice. And yes, we found out later that, indeed, a construction worker had entered the room to check some things. As you can imagine, he was terribly surprised to find a person there.

We managed to give the wallet and ring back to the guest and we explained what had happened. He left quite sheepishly, never to be seen again.