When Tetanus Is Better Than The Cure

, , , , | Healthy | January 21, 2018

(My mother has a really bad needle phobia. She’s tried therapy for it, but still has panic attacks and worse reactions when she needs shots or blood draws. The people at our old clinic knew about it, but when we move, she has to see a new doctor, and needs her tetanus booster shot.)

Mom: “I have a pretty bad needle phobia.”

Doctor: “That’s fine; lots of people do.”

Mom: “No, I mean really bad. When I see the needle, I’m going to pass out. I’m going to jerk around; one doctor said it looked like I had a seizure. I need you to listen to me. Give me the shot while I’m unconscious. If you need me to sign something giving permission, I’ll do that, but you need to give me that the first time I pass out, because I really don’t want to have to do it twice.”

Doctor: “I’m sure it will be fine. Just don’t look at the needle.”

Mom: “No, that doesn’t work. Just knowing that I’m going to get a shot is enough to trigger a reaction. My doctor said she left a note in my file. Can you look? I’m serious; this is going to be a severe reaction.”

Doctor: “Okay, okay, I hear you.”

Mom: “All right.”

(He pulls out the needle, my mom passes out, and she comes to a few minutes later, with the doctor and a nurse standing over her, trying to bring her around. She tries to sit up.)

Doctor: “Don’t move; you had a seizure!”

Mom: “No, no, I told you: that’s just part of my reaction. I didn’t actually have a seizure.”

Doctor: “You passed out! You were having a seizure!”

Mom: “No, I wasn’t! I told you: this is what happens when I get shots. I’ll be fine in a minute.”

(She starts to move, then notices that there’s no bandage on her arm.)

Mom: “Did you give me the shot?”

Doctor: “No! You were having a seizure! I can’t give you a shot while you’re unconscious!”

Mom: “But I told you to!”

Doctor: “Look, I think we should run some tests to make sure you’re okay. If you are, I’ll give you the shot then.”

Mom: “You know, I think I’ll take my chances with the tetanus.”

(She went to another doctor, who not only listened to her, but gave her a mild sedative, and has since provided her with one whenever she needs blood-work or shots.)

Unfiltered Story #103696

, , , | Unfiltered | January 16, 2018

(I am the furniture manager, at a retail establishment that sells close out items mostly. Our motto is surprising savings in every aisle everyday. On this particular day a customer comes in for the second time in two weeks to buy a couch. His wife is a different breed that is skinny, but has huge boobs. She is wearing extremely short shorts and a halter top.)

Me: “The total for the first order is 748.00 and for the second order is 60.69.”

Husband: “You hear that baby, the total has 69 in it. Looks like we’re breaking in the couch when we get home.”

(The wife grabs his junk and smiles and winks. I just smile mortified, wanting to go home.)

Dropped The Call On That One

, , , , | Right | January 15, 2018

(I do tech support for a small telephone company. At the start of every call, we ask for the customer’s name and phone number. The calls are usually routed to us through the business office, so the number that shows up on the caller ID doesn’t help identify the customer.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Company] Telecom. My name is [My Name]. Can I get your name and a good phone number to call you back on, in case we get disconnected?”

Caller: “Hi, yes, thanks. I — oh, hang on, I’ve got a call coming in on my cell.” *thirty seconds of rustling, distant voices, etc.* “Okay, never mind. Anyway, sorry. I’m having trouble with my phone service.”

Me: “I’m sorry to hear that, but I’d be happy to help! Can I—”

Caller: “It will drop out randomly. I’ll just be talking, and then it will disconnect out of the blue.”

Me: “I understand. Is there a—”

Caller: “It’s been happening for a couple of weeks now, but this is the first I called because I’ve been busy.”

Me: “No problem! Let me get a good—”

Caller: “Are you the right person to help with this? I really want to get it fixed.”

Me: “I can absolutely help, but first, can I ask—” *click*

Problem Customer Number One

, , , , | Right | January 12, 2018

(I’m the stupid customer in this story. I’ve just found a gorgeous dress on clearance; in a store where things are usually $20 or $30, this is only about $3.75. I’m really excited.)

Cashier: “All right, that’ll be [total just below $4].”

Me: “Awesome, here you go.”

(I hand him a ten without paying much attention and look through my wallet, noticing I have no change.)

Me: “Hey, could you give me all ones back?”

Cashier: “Oh, um… Yeah, sure.”

(The cashier starts counting out the change, and I get confused, wondering what’s taking so long. After what feels like forever, he hands me my change and receipt. I’m still confused for a moment.)

Me: “Hey, you gave me… Oh! Oh, my God! I gave you a 20, didn’t I? Oh, my God, I’m so stupid! I thought I gave you a ten!”

Cashier: “It’s all right, ma’am.”

Me: “No, really, it’s not! Oh, my God! And I’m a cashier, too! Oh, my God, I am so sorry!”

Cashier: “Really, ma’am, it’s fine.”

(I take my bag and go, red-faced and embarrassed. I just forced this cashier to count out $16 in ones, which I know I would hate having done to me. As I round the corner I hear the cashier say something to his coworker.)

Cashier: “Hey, um… I’m going to go get the manager. I need more ones.”

Wendy Wouldn’t Approve

, , , , , | Right | January 12, 2018

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Fast Food Place]! What can I get for you today?”

Customer: “No, thanks.”

Me: *pause* “What?”

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