Unfiltered Story #148894

, | Unfiltered | May 4, 2019

(I’m the bar manager at a Members Only Club for returned servicemen and thier families. I’ve just opened in the afternoon when 2 ladies walk in. I’ve served the first lady her drink who then goes to sit down and I start to discuss an up coming event with the second, when I see a small white dog trotting past the tables. As we serve food and drinks, service animals are the only animals allowed on the premises. )

Me: [ to Customer 1] Could you take the dog outside please?

Customer 1: What?

Me : You’re going to need to take your dog outside.

Customer 1: Oh, but he’s always come in with me.

(I see this lady in nearly every week, I’ve never seen the dog before)

Me : I’ve worked here for over 5 years and we’ve never allowed dogs inside.

Customer 1: Oh that’s because it’s when you’re not here.
(She laughs, trying to weakly defend herself, but knowing she’s been caught she happily takes the dog outside and comes back in to her drink)

(I turn back to the second customer who has her eyebrow raised. She knows as well as I that dogs aren’t allowed and that the bar manager before me was far meaner than I am!)

Pay It Forward Is Coming

, , , , | Hopeless | April 1, 2019

In New Zealand, we have “pay it forward” initiatives where you can ask for help with pretty much anything except asking for straight money. The idea is that for every instance you accept a gift, you try to gift something or several somethings yourself, even if it’s just time cleaning a yard up or cleaning a house.

A friend of mine and her partner have had it really rough recently but refused to ask for help; for three weeks they were homeless, and she’s eight months pregnant. When they got a house, they found out that the only heating available was a fireplace — we’re heading into winter in New Zealand. So, when firewood was on offer on the pay-it-forward page, I asked to be considered on their behalf. My ask was accepted and we went to pick up the wood.

The lovely lady who was gifting the wood floored us all with her generosity, telling us to take as much as we wanted because it all had to go. We filled my van twice and still have to go back tomorrow to do more. But before we called it a night, this wonderful woman also gifted both my friend and me a package each of vegan, cruelty-free baby soap!

If you’re reading this, know that your generosity and genuine care for others has stunned us and that you have made the prospect of winter for two wonderful people who fell on hard times not only bearable but pleasant.

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Not Exactly The Helpful Type

, , , , | Working | March 31, 2019

(I create the ads for a small weekly magazine, and I have a pretty strict time frame to have them completed and signed off before the layout of the publication can commence. The advertising sales manager, however, will take new bookings with no regard to deadlines in an effort to make herself look good. From my point of view, this just means working through lunch or staying late, with no extra pay, to get them done in time.)

Sales Manager: “We have a new ad to make for [Customer].”

Me: *worried* “We’re getting really close to print deadline. I’m not sure I can get it done and signed off in time.”

Sales Manager: “It’s okay. I typed up all the ad copy for you.”

(It’s the layout, design, and sign-off of the ad that tends to take a lot more time than simple copy typing. Still, we’re really short of time, so I’ll take anything I can get that will shorten the process.)

Me: “Thanks. Where did you save the document?”

Sales Manager: *blank look*

Me: “Is it on the shared folder on the server or will you email it to me?”

Sales Manager: “Oh, I didn’t save it.” *hands me a typed piece of paper* “But I typed it up for you.”

Me: *baffled* “But… why would you type it up, and then not save it?”

Sales Manager: “So it’s easier for you to read than handwriting.” *looks very pleased with herself, as if she thinks she’s done me a huge favour*

Me: “…”

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The Golden Rule

, , , , | Friendly | March 14, 2019

(I have had platinum blonde hair for all of my childhood and right into my mid-late 20s. In this story, I am sixteen and my friend is fourteen. We are travelling to school on the bus one morning.)

Friend: *randomly* “You know, your hair isn’t blonde. It’s too pale.”

Me: “Okay, if you say so. What colour is it, then?”

Friend: “I don’t know, but it isn’t blonde.”

Me: “Well, if it isn’t blonde, what is it? Is it black?”

Friend: “No.”

Me: “Is it red?

Friend: “No.”

Me: “Is it brunette?”

Friend: “No.”

Me: “Are you saying you think my hair is white?”

Friend: “No, it’s not that pale.”

Me: “So, it must be blonde.”

Friend: “No! I told you! It’s too pale!”

Me: “Soooo, what colour is it, then?”

Friend: “I. Don’t. Know. It’s just too pale to be blonde.”

Me: *smirking* “Okay, whatever.”

(I didn’t bother arguing with her anymore since I was familiar with her intransigent nature. However, being only a mere teenager, I did have a giggle with mutual friends about her claim later on.)

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Unfiltered Story #143631

, | Unfiltered | March 12, 2019

Right, so I’ve written about the joys of having an uncommon name before, and I’ll no doubt do so again, but this particular experience this morning left me feeling especially…. strange, for lack of a better word.
* phone rings *
” Good morning, ******* Irrigation, Jethro speaking”
” Sorry, who am I speaking to? ”
” Jethro, in the irrigation department….”
” Heathrow”
” Aah, no, sorry, that’s Jethro. With a J….”
” Yes”
( From the ‘yes’ above, I’m picking this person’s finally got it…)
” No worries, what can I do for you today? ”
” Heathrow, it’s ****** at ****** here, I had a pump set up by you guys a year or two back, and I’m having trouble….”
( At this point I’m thinking what the hell, just go with it, I’m neither a London suburb, a hedge bordering a wasteland, or the worlds busiest airport, but hey, there are worse names out there..)
After what boiled down to: ” Have you tried turning it off then on again? Ok, hold down the reset button, count to ten, then you should be ok”, The troublesome pump is running beautifully, and all is well.. Just think of me as your I.T. desk for all things water – related.
* I mean no disrespect to my caller here, the system they were dealing with can be a right ‘mare for tripping out after power surges, and the fix, although simple, isn’t always obvious.*
” Ok, so as long as you’re happy with how things are running now, we’ll leave it there, but if the problem shows up again, let me know, if need be I’ll come round and take a look “.
” Absolutely, thank you so much! ”
” No problem, that’s what we’re here for ”
” Thanks again, Heathrow ”
* click *
Yep, that’s ‘Heathrow’…… with a J…….