It’s All About The Hamiltons, Baby

, , , , | Right | March 24, 2021

In the late 1980s, a local bank is running a promotion: open an IRA (retirement) savings account, and they will open a new checking account, as well. The promotion is that they will gift you $10 into the checking account.

I want to open an IRA savings account because their interest rate is excellent, but I already have a checking account at another bank.  

Me: “Look, I really don’t want the checking account. If you open it, I’ll just close it as soon as allowed. The bank will have to pay for all the work in opening and then closing the account, having the checks printed, mailing statements, etc. So let’s all save some time and money and just give me the $10 and forget about the checking account.”

Bank Representative: “No, you have to open the checking account.”

Me: “Okay, if you want the bank to waste all that time, money, and effort, go ahead.”

The representative thinks and then leaves the room. A few minutes later, she returns, hands me a $10 bill, and mutters under her breath.

Bank Representative: “Some people!”

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Manipulating Votes Is All Smoking Mirrors

, , , , | Right | March 21, 2021

Customer: “One packet of cigarettes, please.”

Me: “Sir, I’m going to need to see an ID.”

Customer: “What for? I can’t show you ID. You’re gonna steal my identity!”

Me: “Sir, it’s the law.”

Customer: “No! F*** you and f*** this government! No one is getting my personal data! That’s how you manipulate votes!” *Storms out*

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A Storm Of Bad Behavior

, , , , | Right | March 17, 2021

It is March of 2017 and we have some horrible windstorms. Power is out all across the state from twenty-four hours to weeks at a time. It is day one of the storm. I arrive at work to discover there is no power, but due to company policy, we are forced to stay open.

We have one person at the front who can process transactions in cash only, one person to verify prices as needed, and one person to limit the number of people in the store at one time, plus management. Our store policy indicates that in order to sell tobacco/vape and alcoholic products, we must ID every customer and scan their ID. We do this with regulars, out of towners, and even employees. It’s a dumb policy, but it’s to cover our butts.

Our sweet older lady is working the register, and I’m the price checker. Everything is going quite smoothly despite working by flashlight. Eventually, I hear arguing coming from the front.

Customer: “Just look at my ID and do the math! I need my cigarettes!”

Coworker: “Ma’am, I’m terribly sorry, but due to company policy I am unable to sell you cigarettes with no way to scan your ID.”

Customer: “F*** your policy! Just sell me the d*** cigarettes! I’m [number] years old!”

Coworker: “I’m sorry but it’s against store policy to sell tobacco or alcohol without being able to scan an ID.”

The customer stormed out in a huff. Over the next hour or so, this same scene happened again and again, for alcohol and cigarettes. We even put signs near all the appropriate products and on the front doors.

Eventually, our store manager — who is super nice 99.9% of the time — snapped and closed the store. He told us that we could leave the second our shift management got the okay from corporate. Luckily, about three hours later, we got the okay to finally leave. In the upcoming days, some of the same customers came in and acted as if nothing had happened, never apologizing for their obnoxious behavior.

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Instead Of Opening At 9 We Have To Open At 911

, , , , | Right | March 16, 2021

I’ve arrived for my opening shift, but there’s no manager to let me in. I call our general manager, and after some confusion, we realize that our opening manager was hospitalized after an emergency. We manage to find another manager to come in and open, but we unfortunately will have to open late as a result. I’m mingling out front waiting. A few customers try to come in but are understanding after I explain the situation. Until one older woman tries to come in…

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, but due to an emergency, we’ll have to open a little late today.”

Customer: *Explodes* “This is unacceptable! How hard can it be to open on time?! I can’t believe this!”

She ranted for a solid minute and then went back to her car. A short time later, I saw police cars swarming around my store and the woman screaming at both the cops and my rather frazzled-looking manager. I ended up holding off on heading over until the scene finally cleared.

I found out later that the lady actually called 911 repeatedly to report our store not being open. I have no clue if she got in any trouble, but I hope she did. Not being able to buy stuff is no excuse to call the cops.

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Hopefully The OBGYN Forgives You

, , , , , | Right | March 11, 2021

I work in a small hospital as a switchboard operator. My office deals with all incoming, outgoing, and internal calls, we act as the answering service for all the doctors associated with the hospital, and we track and call all codes and alarms.

Me: “[Hospital], this is [Ny Name]; how may I help you?”

Caller: “I need to talk to my doctor.”

Me: “What is the name of your doctor?”

Caller: “I don’t know; you need to look it up!”

Me: “I’m sorry, but I don’t have that ability. There is no database listing the patients of each doctor associated with us.” 

I try to help him remember.

Me: “Where is the office located?”

Caller: “Upstairs.”

I literally look up, thinking, “That’s radiology.”

Me: “Upstairs of what building? There are multiple buildings on our campus.”

Caller: *Getting belligerent* “Of the hospital. What are you, stupid?”

Me: “Sir, there are no doctors’ offices in the main hospital building. Do you know which office building it is located in?”

Caller: “Why can’t you just look it up and tell me who my doctor is? Stop being a b**** and just tell me who my doctor is.”

It is standard policy at this hospital that if a caller becomes rude or swears at us on the phone, we are allowed to hang up on them.  

Instead of hanging up, I transferred him to an office I KNEW was not the one he wanted: the OBGYN.

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