Don’t Swear By His Parenting

, , , , , | Right | June 11, 2018

(A customer is next in line. He is very big, brutish man who is very nastily chewing out his young son.)

Customer: “I don’t give a f*** what you think, you little jacka**. I’m the f****** dad! You listen to what I say!”

Me: “Uh… Sir?”

Customer: *looking up* “What?”

Me: “This is a family establishment, and you need to stop the swearing.”

Customer: “Oh… Sorry.”

(I finish the transaction of the guest in front of him and ring him out.)

Customer: *to his son* “I still can’t believe you! You’re un-f******-believable!”

Me: “Sir! You need to stop the swearing. This is a family establishment.”

Customer: *looking up* “But I wasn’t swearing at you, dips***!”

Me: “I’m calling the manager if this continues.”

Customer: “Okay, sorry.”

(I finish the transaction. The customer is walking away.)

Customer: *to his son* “This place is un-f******-believable! I’ve had it with being told that I can’t swear! Who the f*** do people think they are?!”

(The kicker? Later, I talked to a coworker who heard them before they got in my line. The reason the dad was so mad at his son? Because his son swore. Go figure.)

Taking A Knee To The Wallet

, , , , | Healthy | June 11, 2018

(I work for a Spanish company in Madrid. The company’s CFO and I fly to New York for ten days for several business meetings. After arriving in New York, I trip and injure my knee. As we have the first business meeting that afternoon, I just bite through the pain, and go to the meeting. After the meeting, in conversation with my CFO:)

CFO: “[My Name], is your knee still hurting? You were awfully quiet the entire meeting.”

Me: “Yep, still hurts. I’ll put some ice on it when we get to the hotel after dinner to see if it helps.”

(The next morning my knee still hurts, and now it’s swollen. My CFO insists that I go to the hospital, and takes me to the emergency room. I am seen in less than half an hour by a doctor.)

Doctor: “So, what’s wrong?”

Me: “I tripped yesterday and hurt my knee. I had ice on it the entire evening, but it didn’t get better. It’s slightly swollen.”

Doctor: “All right, and does it hurt?”

Me: “Yes, it does.”

Doctor: “Okay. Let’s take an x-ray, and I’ll give you some medicine for the pain.”

(The x-ray is taken. I receive my medicine and wait for the doctor to come see me again.)

Doctor: “All right, it seems you did fall pretty bad. You did some serious damage to your knee, and will definitely need surgery, sooner rather than later. We can do it here if you’d like.”

(As my CFO is there with me, I quickly speak to him.)

Me: “[CFO], I have no idea how much this is going to cost. I can pay this x-ray; however, I’m not sure about the surgery and hospital stay.”

CFO: “[My Name], don’t worry. It happened on a business trip; the company will pay for everything.”

Me: “Thank you! [Doctor], I’d like to do the surgery, then.”

Doctor: “Okay, perfect. I cannot do it today, but wait in the waiting room and I’ll send someone to tell you when we will be available within the next few days.”

(We both go and sit in the waiting room and wait for almost one hour, before someone in a suit shows up.)

Billing Guy: “Hello, my name is [Billing Guy], and I am from the billing department. Since you are a foreign citizen and have no insurance, we need to go over the costs first. First of all, I expedited the billing of your ER visit, and the x-ray and medicine you had costs [amount slightly under $1,300], which you have to pay before we can even think about scheduling the surgery. The surgery itself will require you to stay in the hospital for a while, and will be significantly more expensive. We cannot tell you how much it will be, as it varies; however, if you want to play it on the safe side you can expect something between $25,000 and $30,000.”

CFO: *suddenly awake* “Okay, the $1,300 I can pay right now. The surgery should not be a problem, as well; however, I need to call HQ to let them know.”

Billing Guy:Should? All right, I will have to speak to my boss. Leave me your contact details, go back to your hotel, and I will call you the latest tomorrow morning so we can work out the details.”

(Two days pass, with no word whatsoever. Suddenly, in the middle of our next meeting my CFO gets a call and excuses himself from the meeting. He’s gone for almost half an hour. When he comes back:)

CFO: “[My Name], they refused to do the surgery, as they couldn’t be sure we would pay. I told them we already paid the ER visit with no problems whatsoever, but it wasn’t enough for them. They said our company’s finance department could afterwards simply refuse to pay. I told him I was the CFO and would guarantee payment, but that wasn’t enough for them.”

Me: “Okay, I can work this way for another week, and I’ll just go to the hospital back in Madrid.”

CFO: “No, you can’t. I already called the airline; they changed both our flights. We fly back this evening, and [CEO] is on the phone with a doctor friend of his who works at [Public Hospital] to make sure they’re ready for you as soon as you arrive.”

Me: “And the meetings?”

CFO: “We’ll reschedule; don’t worry.”

(The next day we flew back home, and my wife met me at the airport and drove me to the hospital where they were waiting for me. They immediately took an x-ray, confirmed I indeed needed immediate surgery, and simply did it. Including fuel money, surgery, medicine, and hospital stay, it didn’t cost more than a lunch for two. I now appreciate our Public Health Care system; even though it sometimes is slow, it is either free or inexpensive. Kudos to you Americans for being able to live with that health care system of yours without insurance. I am not sure I would be able to do it.)

Not What’s Meant By Secondhand Smoke

, , , , , | | Right | June 5, 2018

(I work at a location of a national chain of gas stations. This particular chain is very strict when it comes to cigarette and beer sales. No matter how old a customer appears, everybody in the party must show ID every time they purchase one of these products.)

Customer #1: “Hey, can I get a pack of [Cigarette Brand]?”

Me: “Sure. Can I see your ID?”

Customer #1: “Dude, I’m 30 years old, and I’m here almost every day. I didn’t bring my wallet.”

(The customer appears to be no older than 17. Currently, both corporate and the local police are running undercover checks to make sure we are verifying proof of age.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir; it’s store policy. We need to ID everybody buying tobacco or alcohol.”

Customer #1: “[Coworker] sells me cigarettes all the time and never asks for my d*** license.”

Me: “[Coworker] doesn’t work here anymore. Do you know why?”

Customer #1: “…”

Me: “He sold without seeing an ID, and it turned out the customer was 15 and was sent here undercover by the cops. Both Binghamton Police as well [Gas Station] corporate are keeping an eye on us regularly, and I’m not risking my job over a pack of cigarettes.”

Customer #1: “So, you’re not going to sell to me?”

Me: “Not without your ID, no.”

(The customer starts rattling off expletives and walks out the door. A minute later, a car drives up to buy gas, and the original customer outside approaches the man before he comes inside. This happens in plain view of the front windows and is also caught on the security cameras.)

Customer #2: “Hi, can I get $20 of regular on pump one, and also a pack of [Same Cigarette Brand]?”

Me: “Sure, can I see your ID, please?”

(The customer shows their ID.)

Me: “Thanks for that. I do apologize, but I’m also going to need to ask your friend to come in and show his ID.”

Customer #2: “What are you talking about?”

Me: “He was in here not even two minutes ago trying to buy the same brand of cigarettes, but didn’t have ID.”

Customer #2: “He’s not with me.”

Me: “Then why did he hand you money before he came in?”

Customer #2: “…”

Me: “Sir, I could see it right from where I was standing behind the register. I also saw it clearly on the CCTV monitor.”

Customer #2: “They’re for me. Can you just sell me the d*** cigarettes?”

Me: “I have to assume you’re buying for him, and I am refusing the sale. I am now asking you to leave the store. If you insist on arguing with me, I’d be more than happy to call the police and let them handle this.”

Customer #2: “F*** you.”

(My boss and I had a good laugh about the story the next day.)

Understanding Is Its Own Reward

, , , | Right | June 5, 2018

(I’m working the customer service desk at a movie theater. This theater offers loyalty cards; every time you spend $100, you receive $10. After every purchase, we print a receipt with how much you’ve spent towards your reward and how many rewards points you have.)

Customer: “I need the info for your corporate office!”

Me: “I’d be happy to get that for you. I just need to know why you need to get that information.”

Customer: “Why do you need to know?”

Me: “Our corporate headquarters require us to ask this every time a customer asks for their information so that we can send reports out that prepare them for your coming phone call. It is to make your experience better.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, the reason I need to contact your corporate headquarters is because your idiot employees charged me when they shouldn’t have. I have one of your rewards cards, and I was charged $2.59 extra, even though this receipt says I have $3.19 on it.”

(I take a look at all the receipts and her loyalty card and log into the loyalty balance system. She has a spend balance of $3.19; she used her $10 reward towards the cost of her ticket but still had a balance left over.)

Me: “You don’t actually have any rewards on your card. It looks like you had $10 and spent it, and you spent $2.59 today.”

Customer: “No! It says right here that I have $3.19 on my card. I demand to speak to your corporate headquarters about this!”

Me: “I will call my manager over and he can get you that information, but ma’am, you don’t have a reward; you have a spend balance towards a reward.”

(This goes on back and forth for some time, and when my manager gets over to the desk, he goes back and forth trying to explain the same thing to no avail.)

Manager: “Look: you earned those $3.19 after this purchase.”

Customer: “Oh, that makes sense. I don’t know why you didn’t say that in the first place.” *walks away*

Me: “You do know you’ll just send her confusion on to the next person, right? She still doesn’t have a reward.”

Manager: “I know, but it was easier than dealing with another twenty minutes of that.”

Me: “I’ve met six-year-olds who understood this better than her.”

“Can” You Not?

, , , , | Right | June 4, 2018

(I work in a pet store. We are extremely busy and understaffed. I am the only cashier working, though others who are not cashiers have stepped up to help get people out quicker. A customer comes up with a basket FULL of cheap cat food cans. She just dumps them onto the belt and stands there. Policy says that I have to scan each can individually, unless the customer knows how many of each kind they have. This customer does not.)

Customer: “Why is this taking so long?”

Me: “I’m sorry. I have to scan each can individually, as per policy.”

Customer: *huff* “Fine. Just hurry up.”

(Twenty-some cans later, I am finished.)

Me: “Okay, ma’am. Your total is [total].”

Customer: “What?! How much did the cans ring up for?!”

Me: “[Price] cents each.”

Customer: “That’s wrong; fix it.”

(Now I have to call up a manager to do a price check and manually change the price. Note, since we are so busy, the manager is acting as a cashier.)

Customer: “Where is your manager?!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am. It is very busy here, so she is cashing out other customers.”

Customer: “Well, I come first. I demand to see the manager!”

(The manager, who is in the lane next to me, hears this and comes over. The person she was serving is nice and understanding. The manager finds out the price difference and changes it. Each can must be changed individually. The customer pays and leaves. The next customer comes forward.)

Next Customer: “Did she seriously just hold up this line for one cent per can?”

Page 3/5912345...Last
« Previous
Next »