Wish You Could Dell-ete

, , , , | Right | October 12, 2017

(I work on a busy sales floor. An urgent page goes out for a salesperson. My phone rings.)

Me: “Hello, this is [Big Defunct Computer Retailer]. I am [My Name]. How can I help you?”

Caller: “I need your price on a [Brand] computer, model [number].”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir; we don’t sell [Brand].”

Caller: “Can you tell me more about [Brand]?”

Me: “As I said, we don’t sell [Brand], but let me tell you about our computer line. They are great, and I think you will find that they are as good as or better than [Brand].”

Caller: “I just really want to know about [Brand]. My company’s contract only allows me to buy [Brand].”

Me: “I’m sorry, sir; I can’t help you with that. Is there anything else you would like today?”

Caller: “I’m very disappointed; you should be able to help me with my [Brand] questions. This is very poor customer service!

Me: “Since you can’t buy from us, are you really a customer?”

(The “customer” grumbled and hung up.)

That Order Is Totally Phoned In

, , , , | Working | October 12, 2017

(It is the holiday season and we have a lot of special orders. I am calling customers to let them know their order is ready and what time we are closing. This particular order is for someone with the same last name as one of my coworkers, a fact which I happen to blank out on.)

Me: *on the phone* “This is [My Name] at [Meat Market] calling for [Customer]. I wanted to remind you that your order is ready to be picked up, and we’ll be closing at [time] tonight.”

Customer: “Okay, thanks! We’ll be down to get it in about an hour.”

(The customer calls back a few minutes later.)

Me: “[Meat Market], this is [My Name]. How may I help you?”

Customer: “Hi, we just spoke about my order. I was wondering if you could tell me the price on that?”

Me: “Of course; it’s [price]. Anything else I can do for you?”

Customer: “No, thank you. We’ll be down to get it soon.”

(An hour later, my coworker arrives for her shift. Her dad browses our selection for a minute before coming to the counter.)

Coworker’s Dad: “I’m here to pick up the order for [Last Name].”

(The realization hits. I get his order together and give it to him. After he has been rung out and left, I turn to my coworker.)

Me: “So… I called your house to remind your family to come get your order before we close.”

Coworker: “I know. I was the one that answered the phone.”

(At least she got to start a hectic shift with a laugh!)

The Bulb Isn’t The Only Dull Thing Around Here

, , , , , | Working | October 12, 2017

(I’m at a home improvement store looking for a replacement light bulb. I’ve checked online, where it lists the area the item will be in, but it lists it as an aisle higher than the highest aisle number that actually exists in the store. I’ve just managed to find an employee in the department to help me.)

Me: “Hi, I have this fluorescent bulb that I’m looking for a replacement for, but in a different color temperature. I can’t seem to find—”

([Worker #1] holds his hand out to stop me from talking, signing that he is deaf. I nod and bring out the previous bulb, which I’ve brought with me to recycle, and show it to him. The worker nods back at me, and begins to show me the way.)

Worker #2: *suddenly popping out of nowhere* “Oh, let me help you!”

Me: “But—” *being physically blocked by her while [Worker#1] rounds the corner*

Worker #2: “You need to write things down and show them to him, he’s deaf.”

Me: “Yes, I know, but he already knew what I needed.”

Worker #2: “Yes, but he’s deaf.”

Me: “I know…” *sighing* “Look, do you know where these fluorescent bulbs are?”

(I show her the bulb. She begins to take me to an area where I have already been searching for about 15 minutes.)

Me: “I’ve already been here, and to the next three aisles. It wasn’t here.”

Worker#2: *awkwardly* “This actually isn’t my department. It was his.”

([Worker#1], who had clearly been searching for me, spotted me and motioned for me to follow him again. I found the bulb in less than a minute, and in the new color temperature I wanted. I’m not sure why [Worker #2] intervened in the first place. This store doesn’t work on commission, and it was [Worker #1]’s department, and we didn’t have any apparent communication issues, even though he was deaf!)

Unfiltered Story #97694

, , , | Unfiltered | October 11, 2017

(Certain Allergy medicines have to be purchased back in the pharmacy due to New York State law. You can get a script for them, but most people just buy it over the counter. At this time, Allegra-D 24 hr is completely unavailable.)

Customer: “I need to get Allegra-D 24-hour for my daughter.”

Cashier: “I’m sorry, but it’s currently unavailable right now. All we have is the 12 hour.”

Customer: “Really? You don’t have any?”

Cashier: “Yes. I’m sorry.”

Customer: “What is my daughter going to do? She needs it!”

(The Cashier shrugs sympathetically. The customer starts to walk away, but turns around.)

Customer: “If I call her doctor and get a script for it, will you have the Allegra-D ready for her then?”

Cashier: “No. It’s unavailable.”

Toxic Parenting

, , , , | Right | October 9, 2017

(I’m the manager, and since our aquatics specialist isn’t working today, I’m putting away a shipment of fish when a customer comes over.)

Me: “Good afternoon. Can I help you find anything?”

Customer: “I need food for my goldfish.”

Me: “I’d be happy to help you. Were you looking for a particular brand?”

(We walk over to the food aisle.)

Customer: “Which one of these is non-toxic?”

(I stare, stunned.)

Customer: “In case my kids eat it, you know?”

Me: “I… well, I’d advise keeping it out of their reach, but all of the foods are non-toxic, ma’am, or we wouldn’t be able to feed them to the fish.”

Customer: “Oh, thank you!” *grabs a container of food and happily heads out of the department*

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