How To Avoid Your Manager

, , , , , | Working | March 12, 2018

(I am working next to my coworker in the mens’ department, restocking. Her phone begins to vibrate, so she ducks into the restroom to see who it is.)

Manager: “Hi, [Coworker], this is [Manager] calling. Did you know you were scheduled to be in at 10:00 am today? It’s 10:45.”

Coworker: “Um… I’m here. I’m in mens’.”

Manager: “Oh, wow. I didn’t see you come in!”

Can’t Even Handle Five Dollars, Let Alone A Million

, , , , , | Right | March 8, 2018

(A customer walks up to the counter.)

Me: “Hi, how are you?”

(The customer gives me a smile.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

(The customer puts a dollar bill on the counter, puts a bunch of coins on top of it, and slides it towards me.)

Me: “Can I help you?”

(The customer slides the money closer to me.)

Me: “What is it you want me to do with this?”

(The guy gives me a blank stare.)

Customer: “I want a five dollar bill for that.”

Me: “Oh, okay.”

(I open the drawer, count his change, and give him a five dollar bill. He slides the bill back to me and stares again.)

Me: “Yes?”

Customer: “Can I buy five dollars of lottery with this?”

Me: “Oh, sure. You have to say that, though.”

Customer: “You couldn’t tell?”

Me: “No.”

(The guy gives me a blank stare.)

Me: “You could have paid with the change, too.”

Customer: “But I needed five dollars for lottery.”

Me: “The coin came to five dollars, though.”

Customer: “I guess it did.”

(I slide him the lottery ticket.)

Me: “Can I help you with anything else?”

(The customer walks away.)

Charged With Anger

, , , , , | Working | March 6, 2018

(I always keep an extra phone charger plugged in at my desk in case I need it. My coworkers know this and tend to borrow it when they need to, if it’s not in use. I don’t mind, as we have a small office and I’ve never had an issue with anyone abusing it or not returning it. We had a new hire start about a month ago. He’s in the same office but a different department, so I don’t know him well. He comes and stands at my cubicle and puts his hand out.)

Me: “Hi, what can I do for you?”

Coworker: “My phone is dead.” *shows me his phone, which is a different brand*

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. I can’t help you. I only have [Brand] charger; it won’t work with your phone.”

Coworker: “Seriously!? I was told to come to your desk for a charger. How could you only have [Brand]?”

Me: “I think there may have been a miscommunication. I keep an extra charger at my desk for my phone, which is [Brand]. I am more than happy to let other [Brand] users borrow it when I’m not using it, but I’m not the ‘keeper of the chargers’ for [Company].”

(I laugh a bit to lighten the mood, thinking maybe he thought that our work supplied chargers and I just held onto them. But no.)

Coworker: “Wow, that is the most selfish thing I’ve ever heard. If you make something accessible to one group, you should make it accessible to all. Equality, you know? [Other Brand] chargers aren’t that expensive; you should have bought one to share with people who don’t use your stupid elite phone!” *storms off*

Other Coworker: *across the aisle* “Did… Did he just yell at you for not having an extra charger for a phone you don’t own?”

No Business Of Mein

, , , , , | Right | March 5, 2018

(On my first day of training at a major bookstore, this happens.)

Customer: *sets down “Mein Kampf”* “Don’t ask.”

Me: “…”

Unfiltered Story #106397

, | Unfiltered | March 4, 2018

(I am 26 at the time of this story, seeing a gynecologist for the first time. This is only important because the doctor is a specialist and has never seen me before.)

[appointment goes smoothly, at the very end:]
Doctor: alright, is there anything else I can do for you?
Me: Maybe? I know this is a bit of an odd request, but I have run out of my eczema cream for my face, and was hoping I could get you to re-write the script for me?
Doctor: um. What? Why don’t you have the original doctor re write it, who wrote it for you the last time?
Me: That’s the problem, it was my pediatrician.
Doctor: …You are 26, you don’t HAVE a pediatrician.
Me: That is the point, this is an old prescription—I only need it once in a while, it was last written when I was in high school. I’m normally very good at avoiding putting things I’m allergic to on my face.
Doctor: Uh. *skeptical* That’s really very unusual, I don’t know anything about what the script should be?
Me: Oh that’s no trouble, I have the old tube here in my bag!
Doctor: …alright, let’s see.
Me: *pulls out ancient tube, where the paint/label covering has peeled off in places revealing the metal underneath, very worn and battered*
Doctor: Good Lord, that IS old!
Me: *laughs* yeah, I did say it was from highschool! But if you can’t rewrite it, I can make an appointment to see a dermatologist, I just figured it was worth asking, since I will be out of town for a month and thus not be able to see anyone until after.
Doctor: Nah, don’t worry, this is a very straightforward prescription, I can write it—but you should probably know this stuff does actually expire, even if it doesn’t run out.
Me: what, really? I had noticed it didn’t seem to be as effective as I remembered, but thought that I was imagining things.

(So the doctor wrote my script and sent me about my business, with instructions to see an actual dermatologist at some point soon. Her expression when she saw the tube, though, that was hilarious!)

Page 2/4112345...Last
« Previous
Next »