Impatience Is A Dish Best Served Raw

, , , , , , | Right | December 12, 2017

Many long years ago, I worked as a server in a nightclub. As was often the case, I was asked to work a reserved party. One customer ordered food and a drink – not too complicated, right?

Well, not two minutes after I submitted her food order to the kitchen and gave the customer her drink, she demanded, “Where my food?!” I assured her that her food was on the way, and left to take orders from the rest of the customers.

Every time I passed her, it was “Where my food?!” and patient explanations from me that the chef needed time to actually make it.

After the third or the fourth time, I’d had enough. I leaned in and said clearly, “If you want your food raw, I can bring it out now.”

The customer backed off, and I had no more problems from her until I delivered her order.

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Giving Handicapped People A Bad Name

, , , , , | Right | December 11, 2017

(I’m the fitting room attendant today. From my post, I can see a man shopping with his toddler. He keeps holding up outfits and making comments according to her reaction.)

Dad: “How about this?” *toddler shakes her head* “I know, stripes and spots; what was I thinking? How about this?”

(They joke around for a few more minutes before coming up to me.)

Dad: “Do you have a family fitting room?”

Me: “Of course. How many?”

(I set them up in the room and return to my post. A few minutes later, a woman on a handicapped scooter drives right past me and towards the family fitting room.)

Me: “Ma’am, excuse me.”

Lady: “Two, don’t bother with a card.”

Me: “Ma’am, that handicapped stall is occupied.”

Lady: *ignores me and beats on automatic door button, which won’t work when the door is locked* “What’s wrong with this piece of crap?”

Me: “Ma’am, the room is occupied. You’ll have to use the handicapped stall in the women’s fitting rooms.”

Lady: *shakes doorknob* “I need to use this one; it’s bigger. Open it!”

Me: “Ma’am, that is the only family stall we have, so families take priority. You’ll have to use the other stall.”

Lady: “I’m f****** handicapped; I take priority! Get them out!” *keeps shaking doorknob and hitting door*

Dad: *pops head out door* “Is there a problem?”

Me: “I’m sorry—”

Lady: “Get out of my stall! You can’t use that; you’re not handicapped! It’s for handicapped people only! This is discrimination.”

Me: “Ma’am, this is our family stall; he needs it because he has a daughter trying on clothing, and they can’t use the other fitting rooms. There is another handicapped stall in the women’s fitting room.” *gives man apologetic look*

Lady: “No, I get to use this stall! Get out!” *tries to push in*

Dad: “I need to put my daughter’s shoes on.” *closes door*

Lady: *pounding on door* “Get out of there, you b******! Why isn’t your wife taking your daughter shopping, huh? I bet you’re a f****** [homosexual slur]! Get out of my stall, you [slur]!”

Me: *frantically paging security with my silent alarm* “Ma’am, please. His child is very small; you must be upsetting her.”

(Security finally arrived to escort her away!)

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Thought It Was Going To Be A Hot Potato Subject

, , , , | Right | December 8, 2017

(A customer came in earlier and purchased some of our homemade potato salad. He now calls.)

Me: “[Deli], how may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, who am I speaking to?”

Me: “This is [My Name].”

Customer: “I was in there earlier, and I bought some of your potato salad.”

Me: *thinking: We JUST made that this morning; how is there a problem with it?* “Yes?”

Customer: “It is the best potato salad I have ever had! Whoever makes it there, make sure that they never change the recipe; it’s delicious!”

Me: *startled* “I… Thank you. [Coworker] makes the potato salad, so if you want I can transfer you to—”

Customer: “No, that’s okay. I just wanted to let you know that it’s really good! Have a nice day, now.”

Me: “You, too. Thank you for calling!”

(The customers that call to compliment and not complain are few and far between, but they really brighten my day!)

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Unfiltered Story #101519

, , , | Unfiltered | December 8, 2017

(I was working in a consignment shop when I overheard two young girls’s conversation when they were looking at some fancy dresses)

Girl #1: So who can you see this on?

Girl #2: I don’t know, (boy’s name, likely in their class).

Girl #1: *Giggles so loud they store might have collapsed*

Girl #2: Yeah, what about this one? *Points to another dress*

Girl #1: Hm, how about (another boy’s name)

Girl #2: *Falls on the floor laughing* Yes! I was thinking that too!

(They continue to do this for a while, and it was actually quite
entertaining to watch and hear.)

Girl #1: Wait, what if the boys are doing this to us?! Like with tuxedos or something?!

Girl #2: Oh no….whatever!

(At this point I’m laughing. They leave later, still talking about it.)

Don’t Rain On Their Entitlement Parade

, , , | Friendly | December 7, 2017

(I am waiting on a holiday parade to start. There are police officers on crowd-control duty and barriers set up to keep the parade route clear. Across the street, the sidewalk has been reserved for VIPs of the company sponsoring the parade. Despite the barricades on either side of the street, people keep coming up to ask the cops to let them cross. Some are understanding when told no, but the majority argue back and get mad and rude. Some of us strike up a conversation with the officer standing nearby, and she tells us she’s been doing this event for years.)

Man: “Do people get mad like that all the time?”

Officer: “Oh, yeah. One guy actually told me, ‘I hope your kids are dying across the street one day and you aren’t allowed to cross to them!'”

Man: “What? Was his kid dying?”

Officer: “No, he had just gotten here late and wanted a better spot that he saw in the ticket-holder area, and I told him it wasn’t general admission.”

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