I go to a private Catholic high school; however, there aren’t really any non-religious private schools in the area so a decent amount of the students, myself included, are just there for the education and couldn’t care less about the religious aspects of the school.
Every year during Lent, my school sends out daily Lenten reflections through our email. During my senior year, these emails come up in conversation in one of my classes.
Teacher: “Oh! Did y’all read the Lenten reflection yesterday? I thought it was so good.”
Friend: *Laughing* “No, I just delete those as soon as I see them in my inbox.”
Almost all of my classmates nod their heads in agreement with my friend. The teacher genuinely looks bewildered.
Teacher: “Wha— What? Why not?! They’re always so sweet.”
Half The Class: “I’m not religious.”
(This happens the afternoon after my school’s annual career day. It’s important to note that I am very much NOT straight and my parents are fully aware of this.)
Me: *talking to my dad* “Oh, yeah, we had career day today.”
Dad: *only half paying attention* “Huh? Queer day?”
Me: “No, career day, Dad. You should know that every day is queer day for me.”
(I go to a Catholic all-girls private high school. As I’m FTM trans, I can’t be “publically” out without risking expulsion and being forcefully outed to my parents. Despite this, most everyone I’m friends with knows and is cool and respectful about it. In my sophomore year, this happens when I decide to tell one of my newer freshman friends about it.)
Me: “So, my name isn’t actually [Deadname] but [Chosen Name], and I mostly use masculine pronouns.”
(I guess at this point she realizes that she’s been unknowingly misgendering me for the past three or so months we’ve known each other and kind of freaks out.)
Friend: “Oh, OH! I’M SO SORRY, ‘HE.’ I WON’T DO IT AGAIN!”
Me: “Sweetheart, that’s not how pronouns work.”
(Thankfully, she’s learned how to use grammar far more effectively since then!)
(My parents and I are eating out at a restaurant with my mom’s best friend. Everyone here is from Louisiana.)
Friend: “I’ve always loved Creole gumbos.”
Dad: *a born and raised Cajun* “So, you’ve never actually had gumbo, then?”
(I’ve recently started a casual, semi-survival server for my friends and me on a popular block-based game. On this day, I’m alone on the server collecting supplies underground, a fairly decent ways away from our base, when one of my friends logs on. All of this takes place through the in-game chat function.)
Friend: “Hey! Don’t be alarmed, but I am going to do some house construction.”
Me: “That’s fine. What are you gonna do?”
Friend: “I’m going to replace walls and stuff to be more open and modern, and expand some things to make a living room and kitchen. :-)”
Me: “Ooh, I can’t wait to see it.”
(There’s radio silence in the chat for about 20 minutes when…)
Chat: “[Friend] tried to swim in lava.”
(About five minutes later…)
Chat: “[Friend] tried to swim in lava.”
(Five minutes later…)
Chat: “[Friend] burned to death.”
Me: “What on earth are you doing?!”
Friend: “You’ll see! :-)”
(She was digging out the area under our base and creating a natural-looking lava pool that was to then be covered in glass. She’s so lucky I decided to turn “keep inventory” on.)
