Ah, Mothers, Part 6

, , , , , | Learning Right | September 24, 2010

(The child I’m working with is crying, so I go outside to talk to the mother.)

Me: “Your child seems to have some separation anxiety, ma’am. It’s against the rules, but I could let you stay and watch her work so she’ll feel better.”

Mother: “Oh, I think she’ll be fine after a while. See, she’s been upset since we moved here from Chicago.”

Me: “Yeah, that’s difficult for a child sometimes.”

Mother: “But don’t tell her we moved, okay? We told her we were only going on a vacation. She has no idea we’re not going back.”


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Wi-Fi Works Best With A Mouse

, , , | Right | August 29, 2010

Customer: “Hi, I’m interested in this ‘Wi-Fi’ you’ve got. I want it in my house.”

Me: “Do you have a cable or DSL connection?”

Customer: “What?”

Me: “Do you have a device hooked up to a phone line or cable line that gives you Internet?”

Customer: “Yes, I do. Can you bring me a Wi-Fi?”

Me: “Sure, miss, we’ve got our routers all over in this area.”

Customer: “Routers? Won’t that scare the Wi-Fi away?”

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No Appointment, No Point

, , , | Right | August 24, 2010

Customer: “I would like to cancel my appointment for a tutor at 1:30.”

Me: “You are not booked for 1:30.”

Customer: “Oh, okay. Can I make an appointment for 1:30, then?”

Me: “Didn’t you just say you want to cancel it?”

Customer: “Don’t I need to have an appointment first to cancel it?”

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Stuck In Retail H***

, , , | Right | August 17, 2010

Me: “Hello, how are you today?”

Customer: “I’m rich with the love of the Lord.”

(The customer places a pamphlet about religion on the register in front of me.)

Me: “Oh… I’m sorry, but I’m not interested. Thank you.”

Customer: “That is exactly why you need it. Sin is everywhere.”

(I finish bagging the items and place the pamphlet in her bag.)

Me: “Thank you. Enjoy the rest of your day!”

Customer: “Go to Hell!”

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Bumming Around On The Job

, , , | Right | August 10, 2010

(I work in a high-end grocery store that has a department of employees solely dedicated to pushing shopping carts.)

Customer: “Excuse me, what’s [Department]?”

Me: “It’s a department where we push shopping carts, assist customers, and maintain the parking lot.”

Customer: “Yes, but are you an employee at [Store]?”

Me: “Yes, I’m an employee.”

Customer: “As in, do they pay you?”

Me: “Yes, this is my job.”

Customer: “So, you’re not homeless?”

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