Unfiltered Story #181191

, , | Unfiltered | January 1, 2020

A Public Service Announcement on behalf of Powerball retailers everywhere:
If you are the elected individual from your workplace or group of friends to go to the store to buy 100 tickets for the group,
#1 have your poop-in-a-group and know what you’re doing. If you don’t know what you’re doing, elect someone who does.
And #2, if the members of your group pay you singles or quarters, either pocket the cash and use your credit/debit card (many many places DO let you buy lotto with credit/debit cards) or at the very least, have the cash all neatly sorted and counted. Please do not just shove a pile of crumpled up bills at the cashier and say, “I want this many Powerballs!”

And to those who have never purchased a Powerball ticket ever and are only buying one now because it’s over a billion…do us all a favor and ask for a “QuickPick” or “X# of QuickPicks”. If you really have your heart set on picking your own numbers, go online and do your research before you go to the store. Ask the cashier for a slip to fill out, and follow the directions. If you do not wish to choose your own numbers, don’t waste time and paper filling out a slip…just ask for a QuickPick.

We’re Still Confused

, , , , , | Right | December 28, 2019

(I’m a cashier at the restaurant. A family of four guys has just come up to order. The youngest is maybe nine or ten. Note that all of our burgers usually come with ketchup, mustard, onion, and pickle.)

Boy: “Can I get a double cheeseburger meal with everything but onions?”

Me: “Did you want lettuce and tomato on that, too?”

Boy: “No.”

Me: “So…”

Boy: “And no condiments.”

Me: “So… plain? Nothing on it?”

Boy: “No. No onion, no condiments. Like, sauce.”

Me: “Oh, sorry. So, just pickle, then?”

Boy: “No. Just no onion and no condiments, but everything else.”

Me: “So… lettuce, tomato, and pickle?”

Boy: “Yes!” *walks away*

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For The Love Of All That Is Hole-y

, , , , , | Right | December 12, 2019

(My boyfriend and I are customers at a convenience store. The cashier, who is a family friend of my boyfriend’s and is on friendly terms with us, has just finished ringing us up when she gets a phone call.)

Cashier: “Thank you for calling [Store]!”

(She listens for a moment and, as she does so, her face becomes increasingly more confused.)

Cashier: “Your… donuts had no holes in them?”

(She listens for another moment, a skeptical look on her face, before hanging up.)

Cashier: “I hope I don’t get in trouble for hanging up on them! It was a prank call. They said their donuts’ holes weren’t big enough!”

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Unfiltered Story #177086

, , | Unfiltered | November 7, 2019

So I’m watching both my counter and my coworker’s counter while she is in the mall getting us smoothies. A customer walks up to my coworker’s counter and is clearly irritated no one is there, so I greet her.
Me: Did you need some help in Lancome?
Her: Yes, there’s no one over here.
Me: Yes, she just took a 15, did you know what you needed? I can help you.
Her: I need an eyeliner…
Her daughter is looking at eyeliners and asks if her mom just wants black.
Her: Yeah, black, ugh, do I have to *wait* for her to come *back*?!
Me: Nope, I can help you, like I said. You want the black retractable?
Her: yes.
I tell her to meet me around where the pin pad is. She hands me a coupon good for $10 off of $50, the eyeliner is only $20, so I offer their holiday box which is $60.
Her: So I can’t use my coupon?
Me: Not unless you spend at least $50, no.
Her: *swipes her coupon out of my hand* Ok.
She walks off and I voided the transaction.
My coworker comes back and I told her all about the crazy lady!

Discount? Discount. Discount!

, , , , | Right | November 6, 2019

(Our store is having a sale where if you buy one item, you get 20% off that item. If you buy two items, you get 25% off both items. If you buy three items, you get 30% off all three items. There are certain exclusions, items on which there is no discount because they are clearance.)

Customer: “Can you tell me if I can get any kind of discount on this item?”

Me: *scans item* “This is clearance; it does not qualify for a discount, but it does qualify as an item that will give you a discount on those items.” *pointing to the other items she is holding*

Customer: “So, I’ll get a discount on all of these?” *referring to the first clearance item, as well*

Me: “No, the discount only applies to regular-price and sale-price items, but all items qualify to give you a larger percent off items that are regular or sale-priced.”

Customer: “So, I get a discount on all of these things?”

Me: “No, only on this and this—” *indicating the regular-priced items* “The rest of these give you enough items to qualify for the discount on the full-priced items.”

Customer: “So, all of this will be discounted?”

Me: “…”

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