Check Bouncers Take (Musical) Note

, , , , , , , | Working | May 25, 2021

Many years ago, I was shopping in a music store. I found two albums I liked and went to the counter to pay. He gave me my total and I finished writing my check. He took it and put it in the cash register.

Me: “Do you need to see my driver’s license?”

Cashier: “No, people who buy classical music don’t bounce checks.”

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Being Considerate Is Twice The Music To His Ears

, , , , , | Right | March 24, 2021

When my son was little, we used to shop at a used record store. The albums were $1 per disc. A double album was $2, and so on.

One night, I notice it is almost 8:00 pm. My son and I are the only customers in the store. I really don’t know the clerk at all; I have just seen him in there.

Me: “What time do you close?”

Clerk: “Eight o’clock, but we have to stay open if we have any customers.”

Me: “I heard the other guys saying you just got married. I’m sure you want to get home to your wife. We’ll leave now.”

Clerk: *Ringing up my purchases* “I’ll count this double-album as one.”

This story is part of our Feel Good roundup for March 2021!

Read the next Feel Good roundup for March 2021 story!

Read the Feel Good roundup for March 2021!

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Not Very Closed Minded: The Finale

, , , | Right | March 8, 2021

Our branch is closing down for good. The staff were notified of this a good two months or so before the closing date, and we were quick to start advertising this to the public. Our front glass windows and doors were plastered in “CLOSING DOWN” signs, we held several sales to get rid of as much stock as possible, and we made sure we mentioned this in person to as many customers as we could. In the run up to the store closing, we had so many conversations like this it made my head spin.

Customer: “Where are you moving to?”

Manager: “We’re closing, not moving.”

Customer: “Oh. So when are you reopening?”

Manager: “We’re not.”

Customer: “I know, but you’ll be open again somewhere, right?”

Manager: *Sighs*

Some variation of this happened several times a day, to the point where I actually had to step into the stock cupboard for a moment and stifle a scream into my shirt. A day or two before we closed, a young customer was pushing through the sea of customers grabbing things from our heavily advertised “CLOSING DOWN” sale.

Young Customer: “Hi, I was wondering…”

He pulled out a resume and slid it across the counter to me.

Young Customer: “Do you guys have any jobs going at all?”

Me: “I… we’re… We don’t have any jobs left here ourselves.”

He blinked and looked around the store in surprise.

Young Customer: “Oh! You’re closing down?”

I thought the worst of it was over when the fated day finally arrived and our store officially closed for business. I showed up that morning out of uniform, just like the rest of the team. By the time I got there, it was about nine am and whatever was left of the sale stock had already been boxed away, leaving masses of empty shelving units. Cardboard boxes were scattered everywhere. Posters and signs were in the middle of being taken down. Workmen were in the process of taking apart the counter — literally dissembling the entire counter — which meant the tills and computers had been disconnected and removed. A large white van was parked outside the front doors, which were propped open so that the workmen could carry things in and out.

Naively, I had faith that anybody passing by would see the white van, the workmen, the signs plastered in the windows, and the bone-bare interior of the once-bustling store, and come to the sensible conclusion that maybe — JUST MAYBE — we weren’t open for business. Oh, no.

A customer wandered in through the open doors before pausing and looking up in surprise.

Customer #1: “Oh. You’re not open?”

Me: *Sitting on the floor taping up a cardboard box* “No?”

Customer #1: “Oh. I only wanted [Movie]. You haven’t still got it, have you?”

Me: “You’re kidding.”

He left, still looking bewildered. Customers #2 through #4 arrived in the same manner, wandering cluelessly in through the doors before acknowledging that we maybe weren’t able to serve them.

I was growing increasingly frustrated with the sheer stupidity of each and every person who did this, and as I no longer had my job to worry about, I was rapidly running out of patience. One of the services the store used to offer was a trade-in service for pre-owned DVDs, CDs, and games; the standard exchange was for cash or store credit. Yet another customer wandered a few feet into the store before stopping.

Customer #5: “Oh, you guys actually did close.”

Coworker: “What, you didn’t think we would?”

Customer #5: “Well… I mean… I wanted to trade in these DVDs.”

She held up a stack of movies.

Customer #5: “I know you’re closed, but can I still trade these in?”

Coworker: “Lady, we literally don’t have a till to put them through. We can’t give you anything for them and we’ve got enough overstock as it is!”

Customer #5: “Can I just give them to you, then?”

Coworker: “No!”

We were all so tense by that point, because we couldn’t just shut the doors to keep the idiots out; the workmen needed a clear route to carry heavy objects in and out. My manager got so fed up, though, that he grabbed a rope divider we used to use to rope off our upper floor and stuck that in front of the doors, figuring he’d remove it if the builders needed to get through.

Barely twenty seconds after he’d roped off the door, a family of about five people suddenly clustered into the doorway, trying to push past to see into the store.

Woman: “What’s happened here?!”

Me: “We’ve closed.”

Woman: “You’ve closed?! But we came all the way from [Area barely ten minutes away] just to shop here!”

Younger Woman: “When are you reopening?”

Me: “Oh, my God.”

The woman started grabbing at the divider as if she was going to tear it open.

Woman: “We came all this way and you’re closing? We wouldn’t have wasted a trip if we’d known!”

Me: “We’ve had signs up for months.”

Manager: “It doesn’t have to be a wasted trip; you can come in and help us pack up.”

Woman: *Spluttering angrily* “I don’t want to pack up! I want DVDs!”

My manager just started laughing and turned away from them. I went upstairs at that point because I just couldn’t bear to witness any more stupidity that blatant for the rest of the day. Apparently, several more people tried to come in while I was up there, and by the time the doors were shut and I came down to help with the cleaning, I’d lost count of the people who tried to tug the doors open. Even now, years later, just thinking about this gives me heartburn.

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Being Helpful Has A Musicality To It

, , , , | Right | February 28, 2021

As an avid musician, I like to go to music stores and shop around, looking at different instruments. I’m in a music shop near where I live, browsing the orchestral section. I’ve ordered a new trumpet and bass trombone and am just waiting for it to be brought out from the warehouse. I’m dressed in a navy blue jacket with a white shirt on, similar to the uniform of the shop.

An elderly couple walks up to me and asks a question.

Elderly Woman: “Excuse me, sir, would you be able to tell me where I could find [percussion instrument]?”

Me: “I’m sorry, I didn’t catch that.”

Elderly Woman: “Would you be able to help me find this instrument?”

She then shows me a picture of said instrument.

Me: “I’ll have a look around for you. I’m not a drummer or percussionist by trade, rather a brass musician, but I’ll try and help.”

We look, and I am unable to find it.

Elderly Man: “Would you be able to look at your store guide to help us find this?”

Me: “I don’t actually have a store guide, as I’m not an employee, but I figured that I’d try and help. It’ll be best to see an employee about it.”

Couple: “Okay.”

They go and ask about it and order their instruments. An employee announces that my instruments are ready for collection. I see that there are two large boxes and an additional small box that I did not order.

Me: “Why is there that additional box? I only ordered two items.”

Employee: “The couple over there told us of your generosity and how you tried to help them, and we figured you deserved a reward for it.”

Me: *To the couple and the employee* “Thank you so much.”

It was a Harmon mute, which I’d been looking for for a while.

This story is part of our Feel-Good roundup for February 2021! This is the last story of this roundup, but we have plenty more feel-good stories for you! Just check out the January Feel-Good roundup here!

Read the next Feel Good roundup for February 2021 story!

Read the Feel Good roundup for February 2021!

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Can’t Find “A” Piece Of Music

, , , , | Right | February 6, 2021

I work in the music and video department of a big box retailer, when CD singles are still a thing. I know my department inside out, can tell you exactly where a particular CD is and how many we have left, and keep up to date with the latest music to ensure I can help my customers.

Customer: “I’m looking for a song, but I don’t know who sings it.”

Me: “That’s okay! I’ll help you figure it out. Do you remember if it was a man or woman singing?”

Customer: “I’m not sure.”

Me: “What type of music was it? Was it dancey or a ballad? Rock or pop? Fast or slow?”

Customer: “I don’t remember.”

Me: “Do you know when it came out?”

Customer: “Not really, no.”

Me: “Was it a solo act or a band?”

Customer: “I don’t know.”

Me: “Do you remember anything about the song at all?”

Customer: “I think it had ‘A’ in the title.”

I spread my hands to indicate the hundreds of CD singles in front of us.

Me: “That could be pretty much any song we have here. Why don’t you come back when you have a bit more information?”

Customer: “Oh, okay.”

Guess I should’ve been working on my mind-reading skills, instead.

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