Reality Bites, And So Do Customers

, , , , , | Right | March 29, 2010

(I work at a historical site of the civil war, dressing and acting as if we were still in that time period)

Tourist: “Is that fire real?”

Me: “Yes.”

Tourist: “Is the water you’re drinking real?”

Me: “Yes.”

Tourist: “Are your clothes real?”

Me: “Yes.”

Tourist: “Are you real?”

Me: “Yes.”

Tourist: “This place isn’t very interesting.”


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Stupid Is Just The Tip Of The Iceberg

, , , , | Right | March 29, 2010

(I work as an artifacts specialist at an exhibit featuring artifacts from the Titanic wreck. We also have a large “iceberg” to show people how cold the water was the night the ship sank.)

Customer: “Is this the actual iceberg that sank the Titanic?”

Me: “No, it’s just a frosted piece of plastic to show how cold the water was.”

Customer: “So where in this place is the actual iceberg that sunk the Titanic?”

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Jurassic Lark

, , , , , , | Right | March 1, 2010

Customer: “Excuse me, but are all of these things real?”

Me: “Sorry, are you talking about the artifacts on my cart? Some of these are replicas, because the real things are too breakable to touch.”

Customer: “No, I mean the exhibit.” *points to the dinosaur exhibit*

Me: “Dinosaurs did exist millions of years ago beginning in the Triassic Period, but about 65 million years ago the dinosaurs went extinct.”

Customer: “Are you sure? I thought the museum was making it up to attract visitors.”

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Un-Beaver-able

, , | Right | January 18, 2010

Me: “Hello, may I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I was wondering if every creature you have a statue of is actually living?”

Me: “Yes, sir, everything you see in here you can find somewhere in the wilderness.”

Customer: “Then why do you have a beaver?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “You heard me. If everything in here is actually a living creature then why do you have beavers?”

Me: “Well, sir, beavers are living creatures. Haven’t you ever seen one in the pond down the road?”

Customer: “What? Beavers are real? My whole life I thought they were mythical creatures.”

(The customer walked away, looking lost and confused.)


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There’s No Such Thing As Two Stupid Questions

| Right | September 14, 2009

Customer: “What is the parking pavilion for?”

Me: “This is the main parking lot for the museum.”

Customer: “And how much is the, the…” *strains to read sign* “…free shuttle?”

Me: “It’s completely free to ride. It runs until 8 pm.”

Customer: “…at night?”

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