(I’m stopping my bicycle at a red light. This is the lawful procedure here, of course, though I’m aware that many cyclists think it somehow doesn’t apply to them. Another cyclist stops next to me; it’s nice to see someone do it right. It looks like a student on her way home from uni. Then, a third cyclist wobbles around us, through the red light, and across the intersection. Luckily, the crossing traffic is also slow and it’s only a bit awkward when a car has to stop because of this, not really dangerous.)

Girl: *on the bike next to me* “Oh, look, that’s my law professor!”

(I am a cashier at a big grocery store, we have 3 whole stories, on 2 of which the check outs are located. We have to always ask the customers, who are buying veggies, about the specific type of the veggie, whether it is organic, the store brand or some other brand, to specify the price, because it is not always stated on the certain product.)

Customer: (buys some items along with 2 mangos, of which we have 3 kinds of. His werent labelled, so I had to ask him which ones he had picked.)

Me: Excuse me, but are these the organic mangos or the normal ones from the other side of the isle?

Customer: Wait, WHAT?! Are you seriously asking ME, what kind of mangos there are??!!

Me: Well, yes?…

Customer: Well, YOU are supposed to know these things! How can I buy something that you don´t know about?

Me: They are not labeled so i need to know which ones they are.

Customer: Aren´t you being schooled on such things?! (as a parttimer, although I have been working for more than 4 years for the same store, you get a one-day-training by a senior coworker and that´s it, but I doubt this guy knew that) Well, I dont want to buy them anymore!

Me: I just need you to tell me if they are organic or not!

Customer, screaming: I´m not buying them anymore! (He proceeds to rush out of the store, leaving his items behind. I had a good chuckle with my coworkers after that.)

(I’m working at a hotel where Bar and Restaurant share theire space. I’m serving the restaurant area alone, while two other servers are taking care of the bigger bar area. The à la carte Restaurant itself has only 12 tables, 11 of them were allready taken and one is allready reserved for the CEOs of a VIP group which is meeting in the hotel. Due to theire status as a VIP the reservation was fixed all over the evening and not for a certain time windows as usual. A new Guest enters the Restaurant.)

Me: “Good Evening Sir! How May I help you?”

Guest: “I’d like to have a table for one person.”

Me: “I’m sorry sir, but we’re completly booked out at the moment. You could take a seat in the Bar area which has a decent food menu as well.”

Guest takes a seat at the Bar and is served by a collegue. I allready forgot about the situation when he’s approaching me again after 30 minutes or more.

Guest: “The table is still free”

Me: “I’m sorry sir but it is still reserved.”

Guest: “You should have given me this table. When was the reservation?”

Me: “I’m sorry sir, but this table is reserved and I’m not allowed to tell you information about time and date.”

Guest: “You should have given me the table! This is a mistake! There are other tables free!”

(The tables still had dirty table clothes, silverware and glasses since the guests had left recently)

Me: “Yes there are now, since other costumers have paid and left. If you’re still interessted I can get you a fresh table in 5 to 10 Minutes.”

Guest: “I’ve allready eaten! You should’ve given me this table! There is nobody!”

Me: “I’m sorry sir but this is a VIP Reservation which I’m not allowed to give away until further notice.”

Guest: “This was your mistake! And I want my check now! How could you do something like this?”

Me: “I’m sorry again sir, but i’ll tell my colleague that she’ll prepare your check.”

A couple of minutes later my colleague takes me to the side and asks what happened with him, since he wrote “How do you even dare to?” in the TIP-Field.

(We recently got a new phone system installed. Naturally, we had some starting problems. Day two, my phone suddenly stops working. It’s still able to make calls, but I can’t hear anything and the person I call can’t hear me, either. I go to the IT guys and ask for help.)

Tech: “Go back to your desk. I will call you to figure it out.”

(Took him some time to figure out why I was laughing.)

(I’m working for a company acting as the middleman for event organizers, selling gift vouchers for different events. Part of our policy is that customers get contact details for our event organizers after purchasing their vouchers, for obvious reasons. At least that’s what I thought…)

Customer: “Hello. I found [event] on your website and would like to know the organizer’s exact address and phone number.”

Me: “Sure thing, ma’am. To receive the organizer’s details, all you have to do is redeem your voucher via our website, which I can gladly walk you through.”

Customer: “Oh, I don’t have any vouchers. I just want to know the contact details.”

Me: “I see, but unfortunately, access to contact details is only granted if you already own a voucher.”

Customer: “Well, this is not exactly great service, you know?”

Me: “Please understand that we can not just give out contact details without redeeming a voucher.”

Customer: “Why’s that?”

Me: “See, we are the middleman. There’s no need to buy from us if we simply display our organizer’s details, because then you could just buy from the organizer himself, which would make us go out of business.”

Customer: “Oh. Yes, I see. So, can you give me the contact details so I can directly buy from the organizer?”

Me: “…”