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Bohemian Nobody

| Durham, NC, USA | Hall of Fame, Top

(A customer approaches the service counter.)

Me: “Hi, how can I help you?”

Customer: “Is this the real life?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Is this just fantasy?”

Me: *catching on* “Caught in a landslide, no escape from reality.”

Customer: “D*** it! I was trying to prank you! You shouldn’t know what I’m doing!”

Me: “Doesn’t really matter to me, to meeee.”

Customer: “F*** you!” *storms off*

The Unfantastic Mr. Fox

| United Kingdom | Uncategorized

(A man comes up to me with a huge bag.)

Customer: “Can I ask an odd question?”

Me: “Go for it.”

Customer: “Would it be okay for me to put my fox costume on and stand in the foyer?”

Me: “Why?”

Customer: “Just for pleasure. I enjoy doing it and the customers would enjoy seeing it.”

Me: “I’ll just check with my manager.”

(I phone the manager and repeat the request. The manager laughs for a few minutes and says no.)

Me: “I’m afraid my manager has said it’s not okay.”

Customer: *looks down sadly* “It’s okay. They said no everywhere else I asked too.” *walks away sadly, dragging the bag with his fox costume in*

Missing Out On The Spectacle

| Saco, ME, USA | Uncategorized

(I am working at the theater for a 3D movie and giving out the glasses.)

Customer: “The 3D isn’t working. I want a refund.”

Me: “Oh, well it could just be a problem with the glasses. Let me give you a new pair.”

Customer: “You mean I have to wear the glasses?”