It Started A Long Time Ago, In A Conversation Far, Far Away

, , , , , | | Right | June 11, 2018

(I am working at a movie theater taking tickets while a very popular space movie is out. Sometimes we get people asking what time a movie might end because they are picking someone up.)

Customer: “What time does [Movie] end?”

Me: “What time did it start?”

Customer: *not paying attention* “[Movie].”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, what time did [Movie] start?”

Customer: *getting aggravated now* “The [Movie]. When does it end?”

Me: “I know, ma’am, but I need to know what time it started to tell you when it ends.”

Customer: “Why? Can’t you see it on there?”

Me: “Yes, but I need to know when, because we have had different showings all day.”

Customer: *starting to raise her voice* “Oh, come on. How many showings have you had?”

Me: “Currently, out of the fifteen auditoriums in this theater, five of them have been showing [Movie], and each of them have shown this movie at least four times so far today. So, what time did the movie start?”

Customer: “Oh. Well, it started at [time].”

Me: *long sigh*

What Can I Say Except You’re Welcome

, , , , , | Working | June 7, 2018

(The foyer is getting noisy as customers exit a theatre that has finished screening, and popcorn is popping. I have just finished serving a lady and a few customers have built up behind her.)

Lady: *walking away* “Thank you!”

Me: *getting ready to say, “Next, please,” in a raised voice, but caught off guard by the lady’s “thank you,” I direct towards the next customer an unnecessarily aggressive* “THANK YOU!”

Call Me Grand-Daddy

, , , , , | | Right | June 7, 2018

(There’s a new movie out called “Dirty Grandpa.”)

Every Single Old Customer That Walks In: “A ticket for Dirty Grandpa. Not that I am one!”

(Then they wink at me and walk away, leaving me desperate for a shower.)

Understanding Is Its Own Reward

, , , | Right | June 5, 2018

(I’m working the customer service desk at a movie theater. This theater offers loyalty cards; every time you spend $100, you receive $10. After every purchase, we print a receipt with how much you’ve spent towards your reward and how many rewards points you have.)

Customer: “I need the info for your corporate office!”

Me: “I’d be happy to get that for you. I just need to know why you need to get that information.”

Customer: “Why do you need to know?”

Me: “Our corporate headquarters require us to ask this every time a customer asks for their information so that we can send reports out that prepare them for your coming phone call. It is to make your experience better.”

Customer: “Oh. Well, the reason I need to contact your corporate headquarters is because your idiot employees charged me when they shouldn’t have. I have one of your rewards cards, and I was charged $2.59 extra, even though this receipt says I have $3.19 on it.”

(I take a look at all the receipts and her loyalty card and log into the loyalty balance system. She has a spend balance of $3.19; she used her $10 reward towards the cost of her ticket but still had a balance left over.)

Me: “You don’t actually have any rewards on your card. It looks like you had $10 and spent it, and you spent $2.59 today.”

Customer: “No! It says right here that I have $3.19 on my card. I demand to speak to your corporate headquarters about this!”

Me: “I will call my manager over and he can get you that information, but ma’am, you don’t have a reward; you have a spend balance towards a reward.”

(This goes on back and forth for some time, and when my manager gets over to the desk, he goes back and forth trying to explain the same thing to no avail.)

Manager: “Look: you earned those $3.19 after this purchase.”

Customer: “Oh, that makes sense. I don’t know why you didn’t say that in the first place.” *walks away*

Me: “You do know you’ll just send her confusion on to the next person, right? She still doesn’t have a reward.”

Manager: “I know, but it was easier than dealing with another twenty minutes of that.”

Me: “I’ve met six-year-olds who understood this better than her.”

An Alarming Lack Of Caring

, , , , | Right | June 5, 2018

(At our movie theater, our emergency exits have an alarm that will go off if you even move close to the door; you don’t even have to touch it. I am doing a theater check and see a man on his phone close to the door. Not wanting to speak and interrupt his call, I make a “come here” gesture. The customer quite clearly sees me but ignores me.)

Me: *out loud* “Sir.” *come hither gesture again* “You need to move away from the door or else the—”

Customer: *cutting me off angrily* “What?! Can’t you see I’m doing business?”

(He turned away from me and headed closer to the door. At this point I was just willing to let him set off the alarm, which he did. His sheepish look when he set off the very loud alarm in a quiet movie theater was all I hoped it would be.)

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