(I am the manager at a local palladium. There are 12 theatres. Two of them are bigger and the chairs are more comfy so there is an extra $1 fee per ticket for them. It says outside and inside the palladium when the movie times are for the luxury theatres.)

Customer: “Five tickets for [luxury show].”

Me: “Okay your total will be $40.”

Customer: “Wait I thought it was just $35.”

Me: Well, normally it would be, but that movie is playing in the luxury theatres so it is an extra dollar fee per ticket.”

Customer: “Well, I’m not paying for that! That is outrageous! I don’t care where I sit but I’m not paying the extra money! You’re trying to rip me off, aren’t you! I know your manager and I want to see him right now!”

Me: “Sir, I am sorry to inform you but that would be me and I do not recognize you.”

Customer: “You should do! We had a long conversation and everything!”

(I flip my nametag around and say:)

Me: “Sir, if you can tell me my name, I will wave the extra fee for you, and please do it fast because you are holding up the line.”

Customer: *pauses* “I’ll just pay the extra money…”

Me: “Thank you. Have a nice time.”

(I am sweeping up in the lobby when I come across a $50 bill on the floor. It is very near a customer, but he is honest and says it isn’t his. I decide to take it to the lost and found in case someone claims it.)

Me: *to my manager* “I found this on the floor. I’m sure someone will be looking for it soon.”

Manager: “Awesome! Thanks.” *he pockets the cash*

Me: “What? That’s for the lost and found! What if someone comes to claim it?”

Manager: “You should’ve kept it yourself! Unless they keep track of their money’s serial numbers, they can’t prove that it’s theirs. Take it as a lesson learned!”

(We’re having an employee screening for a movie when a coworker steps out for a few minutes then comes back with a very distinct odor. A minute later, the manager walks up behind him.)

Manager: *dope-slaps the coworker* “Don’t smoke weed in the hallway!”

(The rest of us couldn’t stop laughing after that.)

(Over the span of a month there are several university students going through orientation. We have a deal for the orientation groups in which they receive coupons for our theater, one of which is a deal for concessions. They get a popcorn, a drink, and a candy for $7. This is clearly stated on the coupon, and yet many of the students are confused about how it works.)

Customer: “I just want a bottled water.”

Coworker: “All right, that’ll be $2.50.”

Customer: “But I have this coupon and I just want a water.”

Coworker: “Right, so that will be $2.50.”

Customer: “But I got this coupon for free.”

Coworker: “Even if you used the deal on the coupon you would still owe me money, but since you are just getting water it will be $2.50 instead of $7.”

Customer: “But I got this free coupon.”

Coworker: “You still owe me money.”

Customer: “But I just want a bottled water. I don’t want popcorn.”

Coworker: *turning to my manager* “I really don’t think it should be this difficult to understand.”

(The girl still didn’t understand but she paid for her water. Despite this conversation the other students were still confused as well.)

(My family and I will be moving very soon and so because of that, I’m trying to deep clean my room during my two days off on Spring Break. Sometime around two pm, I get a call from work but miss it due to cleaning. At around five, I call back to see what is up. Note that my friend and I were planning on seeing a movie at eight that night.)

General Manager: “Hello, thank you for calling [Theater]. This is [General Manager] speaking. How may I help you?

Me: “Hey, [General Manager], it’s [My Name]. I was just calling to see what ya’ll needed to call me for.”

General Manager: “Oh, we needed people for the afternoon rush but it’s over now. You shouldn’t miss calls from us.”

Me: “Yeah, sorry about that. I was cleaning for the move. Hey, can I come see [Movie] at eight with a friend?”

General Manager: “No.”

(I assume that we have many pre-ordered for that time since this a premier for a big movie.)

Me: “Oh, okay. Is there any other time we can come in?”

General Manager: “No, we’re not giving out any passes tonight.”

Me: “Huh? Why not?”

General Manager: “Because no one called us back and because if you were unavailable then, you must be unavailable now and cannot see a movie.”

Me: “That doesn’t make any sense. I wasn’t scheduled for today nor did I request today off. I simply just missed a phone call.”

General Manager: “Yes, so that means you were unavailable. Have a good day.”

(In the end, most of my coworkers and I went to another theater in the next town to see the movie. We not only enjoyed the movie but the more comfortable seats!)