Your ID Expectations Are Out Of Key

| England, UK | Underaged

Guest: “Hi, I’d like a ticket to The Inbetweeners 2?”

Me: “Sure. Can I see some ID, please?”

Guest: “ID? Why?”

Me: “This film is a 15 Certificate, so we ID anyone who looks under around 18.”

Guest: “Is [Coworker] in?”

Me: “Uh, no?”

Guest: “Because I know [Coworker]. He’d let me in.”

Me: “He’s not in, and even so, we need valid ID, I’m afraid.”

Guest: “But I have car keys!” *waves car keys*

Me: “Oh, so you have your driving license with you?”

Guest: “No, but I have car keys! So I’m over 17!”

Me: “…”

(It happens all the time, from people offering to state their GCSE results, to saying they’ve ‘seen the film before.’)


Question Their Need For A Ticket

| NY, USA | Bad Behavior, Movies & TV, Technology

(I’m working box office. A woman chatting on her cell-phone approaches me, chatting away.)

Woman: *on phone* “…yeah, uh-huh. That’s what I told him! I know, he won’t listen.”

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Theater]. How can I help you?”

Woman: *on phone* “He’s just being stubborn. You know him. He’s always like this.”

(She continues on for almost ten seconds before looking over to me.)

Woman: *quickly* “Two tickets.” *she immediately goes back to talking*

Me: *awkwardly trying to find my way in* “Two tickets to what, ma’am?”

Woman: *on phone* “Hold up one sec, okay?” *to me* “What?”

Me: “What would you like two tickets to?”

Woman: *scoffing/frustrated* “[Movie].”

Me: *gesturing to our assigned seating chart* “And where would you like to sit?”

Woman: *back on phone* “Yeah, sorry, I’m at the movies. Oh, I know. I haven’t been here in so long. But I’m seeing [Movie] later. I heard it’s pretty good. You should come!”

(She continues talking for almost a full minute while I repeatedly re-ask her where she’d like to sit. Eventually, she puts her phone down for one second and turns to me, and instantly her eyes are fuming with anger.)

Woman: *shouting* “I do NOT like to be ASKED so many f****** QUESTIONS! SHUT IT!”

(It takes almost another full two minutes for the transaction to continue when she finally ends the call.)

Woman: *glaring* “What the h*** did you need so badly to interrupt me?!”

Me: “I need to know where you’d like to sit. Which seats would you like?”

Woman: “Didn’t I f****** ALREADY SAY that I don’t like to be ASKED f****** questions? This is f****** ridiculous!”

(She stormed off without buying her tickets. I’m still confused as to how she expected to get through life without being asked questions, or how she managed when her phone needed to be plugged in to charge for an hour or two, given how important it evidently was to her.)


Going To Racism At Break-Neck(lace) Speed

| Atlanta, GA, USA | Bigotry, Crazy Requests, Criminal & Illegal, Popular

(I work as an usher, and one of my duties is to clean up the theater once it lets out. I am also black.)

Manager: *answering the phone* “Hello? This is [Manager]. How can I help you?”

Customer: ‘Yes, I was at the theater the other day and I lost my necklace. I think that black usher took it.”

Manager: “Okay, ma’am. I’m sorry you lost your necklace, but I’m pretty sure he didn’t take it.”

Customer: “But he’s always cleaning out the theaters once the movie is over. He had to have come across it.”

Manager: “Yes, that’s his job, and anything he finds, he turns in up front.”

Customer: “Just confront him about it. I’m pretty sure that he has it.”

(A few days later, she calls back.)

Manager: “Hello, this is [Manager]. How can I help you?”

Customer: “Yes, I would like to apologize. I called the other day about losing a necklace, and I thought that your usher took it. Turns out it was in the bottom of my purse the whole time.”

Manager: “Ah, I see…’

Customer: ‘Um… he didn’t get into any trouble over this, did he?”

Manager: “No, because I trust him.”

(He didn’t even tell me about any of this until some time later.)


Service With A Smile

| Surrey, England, UK | Awesome Workers

(I’ve just had a customer complain because I informed her she was waiting at an unmanned till while serving other customers. She complained to the manager, by which time she’s accusing me of being rude, something that struck everyone who heard as out of character.)

Manager: “I had a rather loud woman complain about you telling her to go to the queue.”

Me: “[Colleague on the ice cream stand] is on break, and it’s not fair on those waiting in the queue to jump it to serve her.”

Manager: “That’s what I thought; did you apologise for the inconvenience?”

Me: “I always break these things with, ‘I’m sorry’ but I guess she didn’t like the fact I was serving other customers at the same time.”

Manager: “Then there’s nothing you need to worry about. Well, there is one thing.”

Me: “Huh?”

Manager: “I’m not letting you back on the front line without a smile.”

(I admit, that made me laugh.)


A New Landmark In Entitlement

| Edinburgh, Scotland, UK | Bad Behavior, Food & Drink

(I am the manager of a 102-year-old cinema which is a landmark in Edinburgh. We happen to have a film on which is bringing in a lot of people that don’t usually come to our cinema. At the end of this film, I go in to clean the auditorium and see a man dumping the remains of a bag of crisps, which he’s brought in from outside, onto the floor.)

Me: “Sir, you’re welcome to put that right in my bin bag”

(He continues dumping the crumbs on the floor.)

Man: “I paid for these and don’t want any of you eating the leftovers.”

Me: ”…”

(I was so surprised I just stood there while he walked away. All too late, I thought of many witty come-backs!)

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