Unfiltered Story #174587

, , , | Unfiltered | November 4, 2019

(I work in a callcenter that processes claims for various electronics sold by different companies.)

Me- ” Thank you for calling (company), my name is (name), how may I assist you today?”
CM- ”Yeah, I don’t want a (company) plan.”
Me- ”No problem, when did you purchased your plan so we can issue a refund.”
CM- ” I didn’t buy it.”
Me- ”…”
CM- ”…”
Me- ”Well you don’t have to buy it.”
CM- ”Okay cause I don’t want it.”

Worse Than A Baby On A Flight Is A Man-Baby

, , , , , | Right | October 24, 2019

(I work for an airline call center. A man calls to get the bassinet seat on his flight, which is a crib that attaches to the wall on a flight. I ask him if his child is able to sit up without help and if he is over 25 pounds. He is. I explain that I cannot get that seat for him because he is too heavy and it is dangerous for the baby. The man is upset.)

Caller: “This is a nine-hour flight! What am I supposed to do?”

Me: “Well, you do have the option to purchase a seat for him, but you need to bring your own car-seat.”

Caller: “I am not paying hundreds of dollars just for a baby! That’s too expensive!”

Me: “I understand. It is for this reason you do have the option to have him on your lap during the flight since you’ll be holding onto him.”

Caller: “How am I supposed to hold a baby for nine hours?!”

Me: “There is the option to buy a seat, as I said, but otherwise, he will have to be on your lap. Many travellers choose this option.”

Caller: “This is ridiculous! Who will be responsible if I drop my baby?! Huh?”

Me: *taking a second to breathe because he is pissing me off* “I don’t know, sir, but all I can say is that the bassinet is not available for infants over 25 pounds because it is too dangerous. We are following air traffic laws and they permit lap-held infants. If you have any complaints about the options, you can write to customer relations.”

Caller: “This is bulls***!”

(Sorry for caring more about your child than you do.)

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Index(Finger) That One Under Misc

, , , , , | Right | October 22, 2019

(I’m working technical support for a small ISP.)

Me: “Technical support, how I may I help you?”

Customer: “Hello, I can’t bend my index finger.”

(It’s not unusual for customers to warn us ahead of time if they have a condition that we should take into account when we ask for troubleshooting steps, so I wait for the customer to start explaining his issue.)

Customer: “It’s really painful, and I had a lot of trouble sleeping last night because of it. I don’t know what I should do.”

Me: “Let me make sure I understand. Your issue is that you can’t bend your index finger, and that the pain is preventing you from sleeping?”

(My supervisor is sitting next to me and starts listening in on the call at this point.)

Customer: “Yes…”

Me: “Sir, are you aware that you called technical support for an Internet company?”

Customer: “Yes… I didn’t know who else to call.”

Me: “Sir, this is a medical issue; you should speak to a doctor. You should try calling a clinic or a hospital.”

Customer: *sounding resigned* “Oh… okay.”

(I wish the customer good luck with his problem and end the call.)

Supervisor: “Well, that was a new one.”

(From that point on, we started joking that our service was so good that customers call us for medical advice.)

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Not So Closed Minded: The Series

, , , , | Right | October 2, 2019

(As a small casual dining restaurant, we get our fair share of rude or clueless customers. Note that even after closing time, we usually only lock the entrance door once we’ve finished all our closing duties and every employee is out the door. This sometimes results in a customer or two walking in past closing time while we’re cleaning up or even while we’re just about ready to head out. When that happens, we simply inform them that the kitchen is closed. Usually, they understand, maybe buy a ready-made combo from our front fridge if we have any left over, and leave. The following is a collection of stories in which certain customers have been… memorable. Incident #1. A customer walks up to our door, stares at our posted opening hours on the door for a while, checks his phone, stares at the opening hours again, and then finally opens the door and walks in.)

Coworker: “Sorry, sir, we’re closed.”

Customer #1: *with genuine surprise* “Really?”

(Incident #2:)

Customer #2: *walks in and grabs one of our menus to look over*

Cashier: “I’m sorry. As we’re closed, we can’t take any more orders.”

Customer #2: *huffs and puffs* “What? Why not?”

(The cashier explains our closing time and that the kitchen is closed for orders.)

Customer #2: *flustered and indignant* “Well, why didn’t you guys lock the doors, then, huh?! If I’m able to walk into here, then that means you’re open! You guys should be able to take my order! I don’t understand!”

(He continues to throw a fit until he finally leaves. Incident #3: We’ve finished all closing duties and everyone is gathered in the front with our bags as our manager flips off all our lights. Just before she goes to set the alarm, we hear the chime of the front door.)

Customer #3: *walks in, talking to her husband presumably*

Coworker: “Umm, we’re closed.”

Customer #3: *looks at all of us, startled* “You are?”

Us: *standing in the complete pitch dark with all our bags and none of us in uniform* “Yes.”

(Incident #4: In this one, it is the rare instance we do lock the door before we start closing duties, due to being so busy that it is past closing by the time we finish all our orders. A customer walks up to the door and starts jiggling the locked door unsuccessfully. One of my coworkers pauses her cleaning to go up to the door and speaks up to be heard through the glass.)

Coworker: “I’m sorry, madam! We’ve been closed for over thirty minutes!”

Customer #4: *sees my coworker approaching and starts shouting through the glass* “HI, YES, I WOULD LIKE TO ORDER ONE OF YOUR BOWLS, TO GO. I WANT THE SALMON ONE, WITH WHITE RICE—”

(Eventually, my coworker was able to get her to understand that we were closed.)

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Didn’t Know The Coffee Was Supposed To Taste THAT Good

, , , , | Right | September 23, 2019

(At this cafe, we sell coffee beans that we can grind as well as drinks. A regular comes in for his morning coffee.)

Regular: “Hey, do you have a bag of Kama Sutra?”

Coworker: *pauses* “What?”

Regular: “Kama Sutra.”

Coworker: “Do you mean Sumatra?”

Regular: “Yeah, that. What did I say?”

(A bit later, while the regular was drinking his coffee, his brother came in and we shared the story. I have a feeling he’s not going to hear the end of it for a while.)

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