Ah, Parents, Part 4

, , , , , | Right | July 21, 2021

I work at a large retail store chain. A regular customer comes in.

Customer: “You guys always help me with what I need!”

Me: “We try!”

Customer: “I know, and I thank you for that. But I need you to watch my kid while I shop at [Rival Store].”

Me: “Um, no, sorry, that’s not something we can do.”

Customer: “Oh, is it because I’m not shopping here today?”

Me: “No, even if you were shopping here today, we still couldn’t watch your son for you.”

Customer: *Turning red* “I need a babysitter while I shop, and my last one just quit on me!”

Me: “I’m sorry about that, but we could get in trouble because we aren’t a licensed daycare. You have to take him with you.”

Customer: “I don’t care! I’m leaving him here. I’ll only be gone for two hours at the most. Just watch him and feed him if you need to! He likes breast milk, and it looks like you have plenty. Now, goodbye!”

She stormed off. I called my manager and told her the situation. She didn’t believe me at first, but I told her to go watch the cameras. She did, and when she came back, she was on the phone with the police. Meanwhile, the kid was starting to realize that his mom had just left him, and he was starting to get upset. We called over a couple of employees to watch him until the police arrived.

They arrived quickly, and they watched the cameras, too. I told them the regular customer’s name and where she told me she’d be, along with the name of his father, who is also a regular. They managed to reach him on his cell phone and tell him the situation. He came to pick the child up, and I later learned the mother was arrested for abandonment and child endangerment. She’s been banned from our store, but we sometimes go to the same gas station, and she gives me the finger every time!

Ah, Parents, Part 3
Ah, Parents, Part 2
Ah, Parents

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Bratty Behavior

, , , , | Right | July 4, 2021

I work in the meat department at a local grocery store. I hear my name called from out front, and it’s my store manager. A customer is looking for something and he’s unable to help, so I head out and approach the customer.

Me: “Hi there! What is it you’re looking for?”

Customer: “I’m looking for some brats but with cheese.”

Me: “We’re unfortunately out of a lot of stuff, but we have quite a few different brat options.”

I show her everything we do have, which isn’t a heck of a lot due to it being the morning of the fourth of July. After I show her all her options, she thanks me, and I go back to stocking the shelves from getting weird it the night before. Maybe ninety seconds later, the same customer approaches me.

Customer: “So, what are bratwurst?”

Y’all, it takes every ounce of over a decade of retail work’s worth of learning how to deal with customers to not make a face. 

Me: “Uh, well, ‘brat’ is just short for ‘bratwurst.’”

Customer: “…?”

Me: “The word ‘brat’ is just short for the word ‘bratwurst.’”

Customer: “…?”

Me: *Internal sigh* “They’re the same thing.”

Customer: “Oooh… Okay?”

I’m still not convinced she understood.

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Lady, That “Part” Is Your Job!

, , , , , | Right | May 26, 2021

I’m at the vet for my dog. A mother and child are sitting in the waiting room.

Me: “Hello, I’m here with [Dog].”

Receptionist: “Okay, and any problems with her?”

Me: “She’s got some irritation on her… um, lady parts.”

Young Child: “Mom, what are lady parts?”

The mother gives me a hate-filled look.

Mother: “You tell him!”

I sat as far away from the mother and child as possible while waiting for the vet!

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Some Customers Never Graduate Past Entitlement

, , , | Right | May 24, 2021

It is college graduation weekend, so not only is every hotel in the area full, but the rates are the highest they get for the year. Because of the current health crisis, graduation is a week earlier than usual. Most of the grumbling we get is good-natured and understanding. Honestly, we get a lot of “Oh, so THAT’s why!” comments when we explain the rates. And then there is this guest.

Guest: “Why are your rates so high? They aren’t this high in Minnesota!

Me: “It is college graduation. Rates do go up for big events. And each individual hotel sets their rates, so a [Hotel Chain] in Minnesota wouldn’t necessarily be comparable.

Guest: “Well, I’m not here for graduation, so I shouldn’t have to pay those rates!”

For a moment, I just try to think of a way to explain that it doesn’t matter, and I’m glad my mask keeps me from making certain expressions “out loud”.

Guest: “I don’t believe it is graduation, anyway! Colleges graduate in June, not May!”

My coworker and I stood stunned as she flounced out. She seemed absolutely convinced that the entire town had made up graduation to jack up rates. I had to go across the college campus that day. The “fake out” was really well done, complete with graduates in robes with their families.

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I’ve Never Felt So Safe!

, , , , , | Working | April 26, 2021

I have just noticed some fraudulent charges on our bank account at a big box store in Texas from my husband’s debit card. I immediately check to see if he still has his card — he does — and then call to get it canceled.

As a matter of “security,” I know that the card shouldn’t even work out of state without someone calling in and setting a travel advisory.

Because it’s after hours on a Sunday, I have to wait until the next day to dispute the charges, which results in the following exchange.

Bank Accounts Manager: “What can I help you with?”

Me: “My husband’s card was used in Texas, and I need to dispute the charges and get him a new card.”

Manager: “Okay. What is the name on the account?”

Me: “[My Name], and my husband is [Husband].”

Manager: “Okay, yes, I see those charges. It never should have happened because we locked down Texas after a lot of these happening.”

Me: “Well, I just need to dispute the charges and get him a new card.”

Manager: “Oh, he doesn’t need a new card.”

Me: “I already canceled it with the rep last night, so he will definitely need a new one.”

Manager: “Well, you shouldn’t have done that! He doesn’t need a new card.”

Me: “Regardless, could you please just order it for me?”

Manager: “Okay. I have the charges disputed and the money back into your account, and the new card is ordered. Is there anything else you need?”

Me: “No, thank you. Have a good day!”

It wasn’t until after I hung up that I realized she never asked me for identifiers beyond the name on the account. Gee, I wonder how the card was unlocked for use in Texas?

I had to call a second time about a month later when the card didn’t arrive. It turned out that she had never ordered it.

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