Should Have Checked The Sign

, , , , , | Right | July 10, 2018

(We have signs on our registers saying, “NO CHECKS.” The customer’s total comes to under $10. He has three cards come back declined, including a check card.)

Customer: “Can I write you a check?”

Me: “I’m sorry, but we do not accept checks here; credit or cash only.”

Customer: “Who doesn’t take checks anymore? It’s not even $10.”

Me: *points to sign* “It is our store policy; we do not accept checks.”

Customer: “You can’t make an exception? I shop here all the time!”

Me: *I’ve never seen him before* “Sir, even if I was allowed to make an exception, would you really give us a check knowing that your check card has been declined?”

Customer: *long pause, then walks out*

Clogged By Her Own Entitlement

, , , , | Right | July 8, 2018

(I am a third key manager at a national dollar store chain and it is pretty much the only store in the area. For a few weeks, we haven’t been receiving $1 toilet paper on our truck shipments. An older woman asks me to help her find the cheapest toilet paper left.)

Me: “Right now, this is the cheapest we have.” *holds up a pack of $2 toilet paper*

Customer: “Two dollars?!”

Me: “I apologize. We just haven’t gotten any more in for a while.”

Customer: *glares at me* “Whatever. Just show me where you all have napkins.”

(I lead her to the napkins, and then go up to the register so I can send the cashier on break. A few minutes later, the customer appears at my register.)

Customer: “Look at this! You all are robbing the poor blind! Two dollars for toilet paper is absolutely ridiculous! Who would pay that?! Look what I have to use!” *holds up the napkins* “I hope you all go out of business!”

(She pays with change, though she has a $5 bill in her hands. She continues ranting at me, saying it’s all my fault. I just stay silent, as I’m not sure what I’m supposed to say. She then storms out the door and I wish her a good day. I then watch her walk across the street to the drive-thru tobacco shop.)

Me: “I hope her toilet clogs up.”

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Got Their Brain For Free

, , , , , , | Right | July 5, 2018

(A customer comes up to the counter with two clearance items, which are on special — buy one, get one half-off — which is clearly signed.)

Me: “Your total is $13.23.”

Customer: *confused* “This isn’t half-off?”

Me: “No, ma’am. The sale is buy one, get one half-off.”

Customer: “Okay. I’ll put [more expensive one] back, then.”

Me: “Okay. Your new total is $5.29.”

Customer: “I thought this was half-off.”

Me: “The sale is buy one, get one half-off.”

Customer: *looks at sign* “Oh, I guess I need to learn to read.” *hands me seven ones to pay*

Me: *internally* “Need to learn to count, too.”

A Very Taxing Explanation, Part 2

, , , , , , | Right | July 4, 2018

(My store is running a sale, and we sent out an ad for it. A faucet that is normally $150.00 is on sale for $75.00. We have sold a ton in the past few days without a problem.)

Customer: “I want two of those sale faucets from the ad!”

Me: “Wonderful, let me run and get those for you, and I’ll be right back!”

(I run and get them from the storage room and return.)

Me: “Great, your total is $160.88 with tax.”

Customer: “No. I’m only paying $150.00 for both. Change your prices so I can swipe my card.”

Me: “Sorry, I can’t do that. The faucets are $75.00 each, and with tax, that is $160.88.”

Customer: “I already said no! Set the price to the sales price.”

Me: “I rang you up at the sale price, ma’am. The additional charge is just state tax, and I have no control over that.”

Customer: “Stop trying to scam your customers. If you don’t sell them to me at $150.00, I will sue you for false advertising!” *she shows me her phone* “When I put in the prices, it shows as $150.00 on my phone. So, that is what I will pay!”

Me: “That’s because you did not add in tax, ma’am, and our advertisement does mention that tax will apply. It is state tax.”

Customer: “I will sue! Change the price”

Me: “Ma’am, this is state tax. The faucets are already 50% off. There is nothing I can do about the sale price, the state tax, or the final price.”

Customer: “What is the price for just one faucet?”

Me: “With tax, $80.44.”

Customer: *doing the math on her phone* “Liar! Look! My phone says it would be $80.43.”

Me: “The computer automatically rounds up to the nearest cent, ma’am. It would be $88.437.”

Customer: “No, you just want to overcharge me!”

Me: “By tenths of a cent? Do you have a tenth-of-a-cent coin?”

(The customer behind her starts laughing, which makes her angry. She storms out, still threatening to sue.)

Next Customer: “I’ll take those faucets. Feel free to charge me tax.”

A Very Taxing Explanation

The Gift Of Bringing Mother Along

, , , , , | Right | July 3, 2018

(I work as a cashier at a popular hardware store. It can be pretty boring, but I still enjoy it, and I enjoy talking with customers. I have just finished scanning items for a woman who came with her mother and her daughter. She goes through her purse for a way to pay for her purchases.)

Customer: “I think I have a card in here somewhere.”

Customer’s Mom: “What are you looking for?”

Customer: “A gift card. I have a gift card I want to use.”

Customer’s Mom: “Why? Are your other cards maxed out?”

Customer: *her jaw drops* “MOM!”

(She found the gift card, and after using it up, she paid with a credit card that was, fortunately, not maxed out.)

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