If Europe Did Math There’d Be No Brexit

, , , , , , | Right | September 30, 2019

(I am waiting in line to change some money, and I overhear the following.)

Customer: “Hi. I’d like to change £500 to Euros.”

(The customer hands over notes. The clerk counts twice in front of her.)

Clerk: “This is only £480.”

Customer: “Oh, I was sure I counted £500; let me check in my bag.” *no luck* “Okay, it’ll have to be £480, then.”

Clerk: *starts to count out money*

Customer: “Oh, can it all be small notes? They won’t take anything big.”

Clerk: “Okay, but it will be a couple of minutes, then.”

Customer: *sounding grumpy* “Fine.”

Clerk: “Okay, so this is €528.”

Customer: “€548?”

Clerk: “No, €528.”

Customer: “Are you sure?”

Clerk: “Yes.”

Customer: “But when I was going to change £500, it was €550.”

Clerk: “Yes, but you’re only changing £480.”

Customer: “But that’s more than €20 less.”

Clerk: “Yes, because you’re paying £20 less.”

Customer: “But euros are less than the pound so it should be more than €530.”

Clerk: “No, £20 is about €22, so you’re getting €22 less than €550, because you’re paying £20 less.”

Customer: “Hmm…”

(She did eventually take the money, but still sounded unconvinced. I’m pretty sure she went away to tell everyone about the “clerk who tried to cheat her out of her money.”)

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When Higher-Ups Make Sky-High Decisions Without Seeing The Floor

, , , , , | Working | September 29, 2019

Years ago, I worked at a company that made computerized equipment. They had a machine shop, and I got to know the machinists slightly. These guys could make anything, and did, saving the company the need and expense of dealing with outside shops for this work. The shop charged the work they did to the projects it was for. When the shop was idle, time was charged to an overhead account.  

When the bean counters got hold of the books, they decided the overhead account was wasted money and should be eliminated. So, the policy was changed: all machinist time had to be charged to project. 

Suddenly, the price of a bracket (or whatever) went from a realistic figure to something outrageous if the shop was otherwise idle that week. The project managers, who had limited budgets, went through the roof. To “save” money, they started contracting their parts outside machine shop. Now money was flowing out of the company.  

Soon the machine shop was shut down and the machines sold off. What a cost savings!

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Resting Gift Face

, , , , , | Hopeless | September 27, 2019

(I am a fairly anxious teenager, working the till at a charity shop as a volunteer. The charity in question is a very big, well-known one. A man enters the shop and comes straight towards the counter. He’s got a very stern expression, and I’m concerned he’s here to make a complaint while my manager has stepped out.)

Customer: *sharply* “What do you do?”

Me: “Uh, the charity or me personally?”

Customer: “The charity.”

(I’m a little taken aback by his abruptness, and not sure how best to explain the work we do, because it has quite a broad scope, but I do my best:)

Me: “Well, we work with impoverished communities overseas to provide aid, like building wells and schools and, um, also medical care and education. We cover quite a lot of areas, really, but the aim is, I suppose, to help those communities become able to help themselves…”

(I go on in this vein for a while; I’m aware that I’m rambling, but the guy keeps frowning at me expectantly, so I keep talking. Eventually, I run out of ways to explain what we do.)

Me: “Did you have any other questions, sir?”

(Without another word, he pulls out a chequebook and writes a £50 cheque!)

Customer: “What name do I make this out to? Just [Charity]?”

Me: “Yes, sir! Thank you so much!”

(I guess he just had an angry face; he very patiently filled out a form so we could claim back gift aid for his donation, and then he walked out of the shop without another word. Despite his abrupt behaviour, he ended up making my day!)

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Unfiltered Story #168408

, , | Unfiltered | September 27, 2019

(I work in a Travel Money Bureau in the UK, these are examples of daft customer questions we get on a regular basis.)

It is literally my entire job to sell currency to customers, six hours a day, 5 days a week…

Customer: Am I able to get some currency here?

And my personal favourite, considering England’s proximity to Europe and the Euro therefore being the currency we sell most frequently…

Customer: Do you have any Euros in stock?

They Must Belong To The 1%

, , , , | Right | September 26, 2019

(At the cash register in our restaurant/game room:)

Kid: “Can you give me change?”

Me: “Do you have a dollar?”

Kid: *empty-handed and frowning* “Why I gotta give you a dollar?”

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