It’s Time For A Change

, , , , | | Right | June 7, 2019

(I work at an entertainment store selling movies, games, and music. We also sell some little knick-knacks and headphones. A man and his son come up to the counter; the kid has a couple of cheap knick-knacks he wants to buy. Dad has supposedly given him $8 to pay for them.)

Me: “Hi, welcome to [Store]. Did you find everything okay?”

(The kid puts his things on the counter and I ring them up.)

Me: “Okay, that’ll be $6.50.”

(The kid then hands me $7 to pay for the items. I open the drawer and count out his change.)

Me: “All right, here you go, and here’s your change.”

(I hand the kid his fifty cents, and then his dad steps in.)

Dad: “No, he gave you $8 to pay for the items. You need to give him another dollar!”

(I recheck the receipt, and I specifically remember the kid handing me $7.)

Me: “I counted his money twice, sir, and he handed me $7.”

(The dad continues to insist that his kid gave me $8, even demanding that I recount my drawer. I’m the only person at the front, and my manager is the only one who can recount drawers. We also only count them fully at the end of the day.)

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I can’t count my drawer without a manager, and he’s in the back doing inventory.”

Dad: “You counted his money wrong, and you need to check your drawer!”

(After about ten minutes of this, the kid’s dad opened his wallet to double check and… found the extra dollar in his wallet. They left without another word.)

Customers Don’t Know I Am Titanium

, , , , , | | Right | June 3, 2019

(I’m a professional body piercer at one of the best studios in the state. We use the highest quality jewelry possible, and because of this, our prices are a little higher than most run-of-the-mill shops.)

Me: “Hello! What can I do for you today?”

Customer: “I want to get my bellybutton pierced!”

Me: “Awesome! Let me just check your anatomy really quick and get your paperwork taken care of. Here is the jewelry we can use for that area. The piece is going to be dependent on the jewelry that you choose, so let me know what you like and I’ll let you know a price.”

Customer: “I like this one!” *pointing to a very nice double gem prong set piece in implant-grade titanium*

Me: “Very good choice! That piece will go with anything you wear! Now, for the jewelry and the piercing fee, your total will come to $95.”

Customer: “Are you trying to to f****** rip me off? I can get the same thing down the street for $30. I’m going to report you for scamming!”

Me: “Ma’am, our jewelry is the highest quality you can find, contains no nickel or lead, and has a lifetime guarantee.”

Customer: “$95 is a total scam! I’ll have you fired! I’ll have it so you never make another dollar in this town again.”

(At this point I’m, of course, a little irritated.)

Me: “Ma’am, I’ve already told you about the jewelry quality; add on me putting myself at risk with bodily fluids, I think $95 is a fair price. Feel free to go to the shop down the street. You are an adult. I don’t think we will be doing business together and I have to ask you to leave.”

Customer: “F*** this place! F*** you, lady! You’re all a bunch of drug addicts and bums!”

(She did leave, but not after knocking down some award plaques we have displayed and breaking one. She did end up coming back a couple of months later with a terribly done navel piercing and begged me to fix it. Unfortunately, there was no way of fixing it and she was left with a nasty scar.)

They’re Not Giving You High Fives

, , , , , | | Learning | May 30, 2019

(I work for a high school whose soccer team is competing in a regional match. Earlier in the day, the athletic director came to me in a panic asking if I could take money at the entrance since there was no one else available. A few extra dollars never hurt, so I agree. I pull up to the field and start putting on the money belt.)

Athletic Director: “The way this works is that everyone, and I mean everyone, is $5.”

Me: “Including young children?”

Athletic Director: “Absolutely. They could have a baby that came out of the womb yesterday, $5. A guy in his 90s, $5. Students, whether they are ours or theirs, pay the same. The only exceptions are individuals on the pass list.”

Me: “Okay, so we are charging the same for anyone regardless of age, height, weight, race, sexual orientation, etc.”

Athletic Director: “Exactly.”

Me: “This is going to be interesting.”

(I station myself at the entrance to the park. The first car goes through with no issues. Car number two, however…)

Woman: “What is this?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Woman: “What are you doing here?”

Me: “Oh, I’m the gatekeeper.”

Woman: “We have to pay to see our own kids play?!”

Me: “Yep. $5.”

Woman: “I’m out of here!” *starts backing out* “No wonder people are parking over there!”

(She points at a lot for an entirely different venue some distance away. I don’t have an opportunity to protest as she’s pulled far enough away and another car has come into the line. I handle a few more cars before she walks back up, now with a dog on a leash.)

Me: “It’s still $5.”

Woman: “FOR WHAT?!” *points to dog* “HIM?!”

Me: “No, you.”

Woman: “UGH!”

(She walks back to her car. A few more come through with no issues. Then, she’s back holding out a bill.)

Woman: “I am going to report you! You could have told me that before I went over there!”

(So, what was the implication here? That she didn’t know she would have to pay because this was the first game of her child’s she had ever been to, despite it being the end of the season, or that after already footing the bill towards a five-figures-a-year private school tuition, $5 was stretching it just a little too far? Anyway, the AD’s response to me telling him this event? “Seriously?!” Still waiting on that report!)

Gonna Be A Looooong Season

, , , , , | | Right | May 28, 2019

(I work in a relatively small amusement park just outside of Philadelphia. People come from all over to see the characters that the park is known for. While the prices are quite high, park employees have no responsibility for them and can’t change them at all.)

Me: “Hi! Welcome to [Park]! How can I help you?”

Guest: “You can tell me why the prices here are so f****** high!”

Me: “Well, I have no control over the prices—“

Guest: “What do you mean, you have no control? Don’t you work here?”

Me: “Well, yes, I do work here, but I only sell the tickets; I don’t control the corporation that decides the price.”

Guest: “That is ridiculous! I demand you give me the lowest possible price!”

Me: “Do you have a coupon or a season pass? Or do you know someone with a season pass? Or are you the family member of an active military soldier?”

Guest: “No, but what does that have to do with anything?”

Me: “Those are the only ways to get a discount.”

Guest: “I want the season pass, then. At least then I only have to pay once.”

(She then purchases four of the most expensive of the three types of season passes that the park offers. So, instead of storming off in a huff as I expected, she has spent more money after ranting about the high prices.)

Guest: “Thank you!”

Me: *waves absently, and then to my coworker* “Did that just happen?”

Coworker: “I’m just as surprised as you are.”

TV And Dinners And Bisque, Oh My!

, , , , , | | Working | May 26, 2019

(I’m working in a call center that pays above minimum wage, but not by much. I’m an extremely frugal person, which serves me well in this job. My coworkers sometimes have a harder time with it. The following describes several conversations with one such coworker.)

Coworker #1: “Ooh, that smells good! What are you eating?”

Me: “Tomato-basil bisque with cornbread muffins.”

Coworker #1: “Wait, from [Expensive Restaurant]? How the h*** can you afford that?!”

Me: “No, I made it, from some tomatoes I canned up last summer. Only about fifty cents worth of ingredients, and it made about three quarts worth!”

Coworker #1: “D***, girl, nobody has time for crap like that!” *eats her $10 takeout meal*

(Later:)

Coworker #1: “Hey, did you see [TV Show] last night?”

Me: “No, I don’t watch much TV, sorry.”

Coworker #1: “WHAT?! What the h*** do you do with your time?! I’d be bored out of my mind.”

(Another day, she overhears me talking with another coworker about a good-quality grain-grinder I bought.)

Coworker #1: “How the h*** can you even afford that?!”

Me: “I’ve been saving up for it for two years now. I have a ton of wild grains growing in my backyard. If I can—“

Coworker #1: “Just buy your food like everyone else does!”

(Another day, I catch part of a conversation happening near my desk:)

Coworker #1: *in tears* “How can they evict me? It’s not my fault I didn’t have money for the rent! Our fridge broke down. Do you know how much it costs to eat restaurant food three times a day? What am I supposed to tell my little boy?”

Coworker #2: “Wait, didn’t your fridge break down months ago?”

Coworker #1: “Yeah, I couldn’t afford a new one! If I had a fridge, I’d have a place to keep TV dinners, and then we wouldn’t have to eat out every meal.”

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