Has A Masters In Millennial Problems

, , , , | Working | November 7, 2017

(I graduated a few years ago, but due to the “experience problem” still haven’t managed to find a suitable job. Currently, I’m doing uneducated hospitality work, like catering, banqueting, etc. in a congress centre. One morning, I have a conversation about all and nothing with a colleague.)

Me: “Well, I like being treated like an adult, you know? I mean, my age and my master grade might be signs that I am an adult, don’t you think?”

Coworker: “You have a grade?”

Me: “Yes, university.”

Coworker: “Then, what are you doing here?”

Me: “Earning actual money.”

The Only Digging Is Into The Hole You Made Yourself

, , , , , , , | Friendly | November 6, 2017

(My boyfriend and I are going out for dinner. I’m currently a full-time student, so we’re living on his salary until I finish school and start my job. The bill comes and he goes to pay it when another customer, who’s been glowering at us all this time, decides to jump in.)

Stranger: “Letting her man pay for everything! Gold-digger.”

(We both freeze, and I look over at him.)

Me: “Not that it’s really any of your business, but I’m still in school. I’ll start paying for things as soon as I start making money.”

Stranger: *mocking* “Oh, and what are you studying? Flower arranging? Interior design? You’re going to be mooching off your man forever. This is what’s wrong with the world! You need to go out and get a real job instead of being a gold-digging freeloader!”

(My boyfriend decides to jump in.)

Boyfriend: “Actually, she’s a medical student. We’re out celebrating because she just found out she got her residency at [Prestigious Local Hospital], and she’ll be starting there as soon as she finishes up her last round of rotations. Give it a few years, and she’ll making… probably four times what I do.” *laughing* “If anything, I’m the gold-digger; I’m just doing it preemptively!”

(The guy goes red and can’t make eye contact, while my boyfriend and I start affectionately arguing about whether it’s possible be a preemptively gold-digger, or whether that’s just investment in your partner’s career. When the waitress comes to collect our check a minute later, she brings us a couple slices of chocolate cake, as well.)

Boyfriend: “Oh, we didn’t order these.”

Waitress: “Yeah, I know. On the house. Congratulations on getting a good residency, and good job handling that jerk! That was the best laugh I’ve had all night.” *raising her voice just a little, and winking at us* “Some people just can’t keep their noses out of other people’s business.”

(The guy went even redder, and we both thanked her profusely. Great way to end the night!)

A Minimum Understanding On Minimum Wage

, , , , , | Right | November 3, 2017

Me: “Thank you for calling [Store]. How may I help you today?”

Customer: “Do you guys cash payroll checks?”

Me: “Sometimes; it depends. May I ask how much it is?”

Customer: “Two hundred and sixty.”

Me: “Well, that’s actually more than we’re allowed to cash in this store. I’m sorry, but we can’t.”

Customer: “What? No? You can’t? How much is your limit?”

Me: “Nope. We can’t. Our limit is about two hundred dollars, even.”

Customer: *angrily* “That’s ridiculous! Who only makes two hundred dollars on a paycheck?! Nobody gets paid that little! Who would only get that? This is stupid!”

Me: “Honestly, sir, a lot of the people in this store only make about two hundred dollars.”

Customer: *goes quiet for a minute, then sounds very sad when he starts talking again* “I am so… Oh, my God. I’m sorry. I didn’t know. Oh, my God.” *click*

They Don’t Want You Or Your Money

, , , , , , | Right | November 1, 2017

(I work in a locally owned craft store. An elderly man brings a bouquet of balloons to the register.)

Customer: *hands me the price slip* “I guess you want money now, don’t you?”

Me: “Um… Yes. Just let me calculate your total.”

Customer: “Well, that’s just like a woman, isn’t it? They always want money!”

Me: *speechless*

Always Free To Complain

, , , | Right | October 31, 2017

(If a passenger has paid a base fare, they can purchase a transfer for a $1 to get on the next bus they need. The fare box on my bus jams and won’t accept paper money. This means all passengers ride free; can’t take the fare from one, can’t take it from any of them. As I’m picking up passengers, I tell them the ride is free and to have a seat. One passenger looks confused.)

Passenger: “I need a transfer.”

Me: “I can’t sell the transfer, as my fare box is jammed, so you’re riding for free.”

Passenger: “But I need a transfer for the next bus. How am I going to get on my next bus?”

Me: “You still have your original fare in your hand, and you can use that.”

Passenger: “Ugh! I’m going to call your customer service line and file a complaint.”

Me: “But you’re riding for free this trip. You don’t need a transfer.”

(When she left the bus, she was still grumbling about getting cheated. I would love to have heard that call to customer service.)

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