I get a call-in order for our spicy chicken wings. A guy shows up to pick up his order, pays, and goes back to his car. This guy and his girlfriend eat the wings in their car and occasionally look back inside at me.

Half an hour later, the guy comes crashing through the door, yelling and screaming that there are feathers in his chicken wings. I open the box and notice big white CRAFT feathers on top of the fully-eaten wings. The feathers barely have sauce on them except for where they have touched the wings.

Me: “Sir, these are not chicken feathers, and you ate all of the wings.”

Customer: “No! Those are chicken feathers on my wings, and I want new wings!”

Me: “Sir, I can clearly tell you put craft feathers on these. I can’t get any more made.”

Customer: “This is bulls***! Get me your f****** manager!”

I went to the office and the owner of the place was the only one there. I could tell he was in a bad mood. For me, this was perfect! I told him the story and showed him the box. He rolled his eyes and stomped to the front.

The guy told him that his wings had feathers on them and he wanted new wings. Boss Man told him he’s not stupid, those weren’t chicken feathers, and he could go somewhere else if he wanted to try and scam for extra food. Best day of my life! Finally, someone wasn’t getting away with their scams!

We’ve just gotten a new general manager and she’s learning the ropes. Everyone’s a little frustrated with her because she likes to go on little power trips, but we’re trying to be patient and let her get used to having her own store.

Right before she started with us, my boyfriend and I got a new puppy, and since I work close to home, I go home on my lunch breaks to let him outside and play with him for a few minutes. We get thirty minutes, and sometimes I take thirty-two or thirty-five minutes, so the new GM sits me down to talk about it. I agree to be more careful about getting back on time and the rest of the week I’m only punched out for twenty-five to twenty-seven minutes.

The new GM goes back to her training club for a few weeks, and this week is her first week as the official GM, no longer the GM in training. The puppy is big enough now that I don’t have to go home on my lunches, on the GM’s first official day, I eat lunch at work.

I’m in the back on my lunch break, crocheting and listening to a podcast, wearing huge headphones. [General Manager] walks in and bustles around for a moment before calling my name. I pause my podcast.

Me: “Yeah?”

General Manager: “Are you on lunch?”

I look down at my crocheting.

Me: “Um, yeah.”

General Manager: “Okay.”

She goes about her business. I think that’s weird, but whatever. An hour and a half later, I’m at the front desk with her.

Me: “Oh, let me show you a new pic of my puppy! He’s gotten so big, I don’t have to go home on my lunches anymore!”

General Manager: “Did you do what I told you and put newspapers on the floor so he didn’t mess it up?”

Me: “Uh, no, I don’t want him thinking peeing on the floor is okay, but he’s big enough to hold his bladder now.”

General Manager: “[My Name], I’m begging you, please, please, please. You’ve got to make sure you’re getting back before thirty minutes have passed. We can’t be taking long lunches!”

Me: *Totally baffled* “Um, I don’t.”

General Manager: “You don’t?”

Me: “No, I literally just told you I don’t! And you talked to me today while I was on lunch, and you asked me if I was!”

General Manager: “Well, I can’t have you taking excessive breaks, then. You can make your coffee and sit back there for a moment, but don’t spend too much time in the break room.”

Me: *Holds up my coffee* “I don’t. I make my coffee and bring it out here to drink. Even if I have to eat a protein bar, I wolf it down so I’m not back there for long.”

General Manager: “Well, you know [Regional Manager] is on my back. I gotta impress her, gotta stop all the bad habits here!”

Me: “Okay…”

I still don’t know what on earth happened there. Totally baffled me. I’m leaving for a better job soon anyway, so I’m just trying to stay out of her way. Not sure if she’s got it out for me in particular or if it was another power trip.

Customer: “Do you have a comment card I can fill out?”

Me: “No, sir, but we have an online survey where you can leave comments. I am the manager on duty; how can I help?”

Customer: “Well, I’m not complaining, but our meal was terrible. The steak was way too small, and…”

Complain, complain, complain…

A friend of his walks by and says:

Customer’s Friend: “Hey, man! Great to see you! How you been doing?”

Customer: “Great, man! Too blessed to complain about anything! Good seeing you!”

The customer turns back to me.

Customer: “Anyway, my wife’s meal was bad, too. She…”

Complain, complain, complain…

My husband and I go to a chicken fast food place famous for its Louisiana-style chicken. We go through the drive-thru and order a [Chicken Meal #1] with a side of [Side #1]. We are the only customers in the drive-thru and there is nobody inside.

Worker: “That’ll be [price]. Here’s your order, sir.”

Husband: “Thanks, ma’am.”

My husband pulls away as I start going through the order. I open the chicken container and see that it is [Chicken Meal #2].

Me: “Honey, this is [Chicken Meal #2], not [Chicken Meal #1].”

Husband: “No problem. I’ll just park here and bring it back in.”

He goes back inside the restaurant and lets a worker know. She apologizes and hands my husband a container with [Chicken Meal #1]. He comes out and gets back in the car with the correct chicken.

Husband: “Well, that was interesting. I tried to give her back the wrong chicken and she told me to keep it.”

Me: “It’s about to get more interesting. They gave us [Side #2] instead of [Side #1].”

Husband: “Are you kidding me? I’ll go back in again.”

He goes in a second time to get the correct side.

Husband: “She gave me [Side #1] and told me to keep [Side #2].”

While en route home, I realized that there was no [Bread Side], which should automatically come with the meal we ordered. Back we went. The workers were very apologetic. My husband and I found it overly amusing that an order could be messed up so badly. In the end, we ended up getting a whole bunch of chicken and a side for free.

I work in the drive-thru during the graveyard shift for a restaurant that is known for its hand-dipped milkshakes and steak-burgers.

It’s about 2:00 am when someone pulls into the drive-thru.

Me: “Welcome to [Restaurant]. My name is [My Name]. What can I make fresh for you today?”

Customer: “Do you have drinkable milkshakes?”

I look at my coworker who is wearing a headset. I give her a “Did I just hear what I think I just heard?” look. She just throws her hands up and sighs.

Me: “I’m sorry, sir, I don’t think I heard you correctly. Could you repeat that for me?”

Customer: “I said, do you have drinkable milkshakes?”

I blink a few times before I answer.

Me: “Did… Did you ask if we had drinkable milkshakes?”

Customer: “Yes! Are they drinkable milkshakes or do I gotta eat the milkshake?”

Me: “Um… yes, sir, our milkshakes are definitely drinkable.”

Customer: “Are you sure they are the drinkable kind of milkshake? I don’t want to order it unless you are sure it’s a drinkable milkshake. I don’t like the milkshake you have to eat.”

I look over at my coworker who is trying not to laugh too loud at what we just heard. I shake my head before I answer.

Me: “Uh. Um. Y-y-yes sir. I’m 100% positive our shakes are the drinkable kind. I will even make sure they make it a little bit thinner for you if you like.”

Customer: “No, you can make it like normal. Just make sure it’s a drinkable milkshake for me. Okay?”

Me: “Yes, sir. What kind of shake would you like?”

Customer: “May I have a drinkable chocolate milkshake?”

Me: “Yes, sir. Your total is $3.29.”

After he pulled off, I walked away and started laughing. Now, anytime someone asks my coworker or me for a shake, we ask each other if it’s a DRINKABLE milkshake.