We Support A Feminine Future AND Mexican Food

, , , , , | Right | February 12, 2019

(This takes place shortly after the Women’s March, for which I purchased a shirt that says, “The Future Is Female.” After the march, I head to work, where the uniform policy is fairly progressive and lax.)

Customer #1: “What does your shirt mean?”

Me: “Well, I strongly support a lot of the protests and marches that are going on, and the company making them is donating some proceeds to organizations with similar views.”

Customer #1: “So, you want to feed the hungry?”

Me: “I’m sorry?”

Customer #2: “What are you talking about?”

Customer #1: *confused, stares at [Customer #2], and then reads my shirt again* “Oh! Sorry. I thought it said, ‘The Future is Tamales.’”

Customer #2: *to me* “He lost his glasses yesterday. Sorry about that.”

(I laughed my way back to the kitchen, though I do wish there were substantially more tamales in my future, as well.)

At This Office, If You Can’t Stand The Heat, Get Out Of The Kitchen

, , , , , | Working | February 11, 2019

(I am overweight. Our office recently moved and clients are coming by to see the new office. I’m giving one such tour and we get to the kitchen.)

Me: “And here’s the kitchen.”

Client: “Oh! Is this your office?”

Me: “No. That’s the kitchen.”

(It turns out, she had seen me cut through there to a different part of the office earlier and assumed that it was my office without really looking or listening to what I said. She was rather embarrassed at having insinuated that the kitchen was the office of the biggest guy there. We had a good laugh about it.)


Unfiltered Story #139207

, , | Unfiltered | February 5, 2019

(I’m making a quick trip to the store near work for dish detergent, and just leaving the aisle where it’s stocked when a woman pushing a cart approaches me.)

Woman: “Excuse me, am I blind or just completely overlooking the oven cleaner? I just can’t find it. I know you don’t work here.”

(I get asked for help all the time in stores, but this is the first time the other customer actually recognized I wasn’t an employee!)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 83

, , , , | Right | February 1, 2019

(I work at a store where we ask every guest if they would like to sign up for a store card to save 5% on their purchase. A customer comes up who appears to be around 40 years old.)

Me: “Hello. Would you like to save 5% on your purchase with a [Store] debit or credit card?”

Guest: “Sure.”

Me: “Great, it will just take a few minutes to apply. First, would you like the debit or credit option?”

Guest: *with very confused face* “Aren’t debit and credit cards the same thing?”

Me: “…”

(This happens all the time, where guests have no idea what the difference between a debit and credit card is. I then have to explain what the difference is between them, without asking them how they made it this far in life without knowing.)

This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 81
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 80
This Is Why We’re In A Recession, Part 79

Insert Intelligence Here

, , , , | Right | February 1, 2019

(I am working the cash register, helping a lady who appears to be 50. We are having a nice, normal talk until we get to paying.)

Guest: *pulls out a card from her wallet*

Me: “Oh, I see you have a chip card. Just so you know, we’ve installed chip card readers now.”

Guest: “Oh, okay.”

(She then proceeds to start waving her card around in the air above her head.)

Me: “Miss, you need to insert the card over here.”

Guest: “Oh, I need to insert it somewhere?”

Me: “Umm, yes.”

(To this day I don’t understand how she thought waving her card around would process her payment. The scary part was that she was serious about thinking it would work that way.)

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