Translation Frustration

, , , , , | Right | October 29, 2018

(I work nights at a local bank’s call center. During the day we have Spanish-speaking agents available. At night we use a translator service line for any non-English speaking customers. To use it, we place the customer on hold and call over to a translator. I know a few words in Spanish but not much. This call came at around 10 pm.)

Me: “Thank you for calling [Bank]. How may I help you?”

Customer: *speaks rapidly in Spanish then pauses*

Me: “Si! Lo siento; no hablo español. Un momento, por favor!” *Yes, I am sorry; I don’t speak Spanish. One moment, please.*

Customer: *speaks rapidly in Spanish again*

Me: “Uhh…” *in a hopeful tone* “No habla español? Hablo ingles?”

Customer: *sighs and speaks slower in Spanish as if to a kid*

Me: “I still don’t speak Spanish, sir.”

Customer: *confused sounding Spanish*

Me: “Can I put you on hold?”

Customer: “Qué?”

Me: “Un momento?”

Customer: “Ohhh… Okay.”

(I put the customer on hold and get a translator. It takes around 30 seconds. The rest of the conversation goes through the translator.)

Me: “How can I help you?”

Customer: “Why don’t you speak Spanish? I pressed the Spanish number.”

Me: “We don’t have Spanish agents at night because few people call in.”

Customer: “Well, that is stupid. Fine, just give me my balance.”

Me: “Okay, can I get your account or card number?”

Customer: “I already gave you this information three times.”

(The customer says a string of words the translator won’t translate, then hangs up.)

Translator: “Wow, that was…  Need me for anything else?”

Me: “Nope. Have a good night.”

Translator: “Good luck!”

What Home Isn’t Improved With Milk?

, , , | Right | October 27, 2018

(It is a half-hour before the home improvement store where I work closes for the night.)

Customer: “Where is the milk?”

Me: “We don’t sell milk. “

Customer: “What do you mean, you don’t sell milk? “

Me: “We don’t sell milk. We never have. Try the [Store #1] next door, or the [Store #2] across the street.”

Customer: “Not any food anywhere in the whole store?”

Me: “We have chips and pop up at the registers.”

(The customer stared at me, confused, for a while before finally leaving.)

Dell-ete This Number

, , , | Working | October 27, 2018

(My son answers our home phone, listens for a moment, and informs me it’s something about a virus. I know what’s coming, so I take the phone from him.)

Me: “Hello?”

Caller: “Hello, I’m calling today because our system has detected a virus on your Microsoft computer.”

Me: “Oh, that’s not good. Which one?”

Caller: “Your Microsoft computer.”

Me: “Yes, which one?”

Caller: “The one that runs Microsoft.”

Me: “We have three computers; they all run Microsoft.”

Caller: “You are asking the brand of computer?”

Me: “Yes”

Caller: “That would be your Dell.”

Me: “Ooh… Swing and a miss. Goodbye.”

Unfiltered Story #123716

, , | Unfiltered | October 20, 2018

(I work at a major retailer that scans or slides IDs for the items where we have to card people. We also are able to do receipt lookups for items purchased using a credit/debit card, check, or gift card with in the return period. This customer has bought Nicorettte & I asked for his ID & he requested that I not scan it.)

Customer: I don’t want my ID scanned because I don’t want them tracking what I’m buying.

(He payed with his credit or debit card.)

Impatient Patient, Party Of One

, , , | Right | October 18, 2018

(I am waiting in line for my prescription to be ready when I see this take place.)

Cashier: “Sir, we are trying to get a hold of the number on your file, but we are unable to reach them at the moment—”

Customer: “I have been waiting, and you’re letting all these other people go. Call the number again!”

Cashier: “Again, sir, I am sorry. We’ll try the number again and let you know.”

(The cashier goes back to the phone while the customer paces and keeps calling someone.)

Cashier: “Sorry, sir, we are still trying to get a hold of someone on that number, but we’re unable to get through.”

Customer: “Well, this is bulls***. I want your name and the manager’s name.”

(The cashier sends him off with the information and he walks away grumbling. The cashier calls me up and informs me that they are bit behind, but it will be filled shortly.)

Me: “That’s no problem; I can wait.”

Cashier: “You have time to wait?”

Me: “Yeah, I understand, and I am not going to be like that guy. He was just plain rude.”

(We laughed and she walked away with a smile.)

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