(I work at a Japanese restaurant and yes, I am Asian. There is a family of four sitting at a table.)

Me: “Good evening, everyone. Can I start you guys off with anything?”

Customer: “Where are you from?”

Me: “I am from Taiwan.”

Customer: “Oh, wow! My son is taking Japanese in school. Do you speak Japanese?”

Me: “No, I’m sorry.”

Customer: “That’s a shame. Can I have a California Roll?”

This story is part of our “Where are you from?” roundup!

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(My friend and I are walking into a store with a blood drive van parked upfront.)

Recruiter: “Hi! Would you like to donate blood? It could save a life!”

Friend: “Sorry. I don’t believe in helping others.”

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(A customer walks in with his girlfriend. He’s having an issue with his cellphone.)

Customer: “I can’t hear my phone ring! This is an outrage! I paid so much money for this thing! I should just return this piece of s*** right now!”

(Without saying a word, I take the phone and move the “silence” switch to “off”.)

Me: “Now try it.”

(The girlfriend calls the customer’s phone, and sure enough, it rings loud and clear. The customer sheepishly walks out and his girlfriend follows.)

Customer’s Girlfriend: *to her boyfriend* “I told you, you f***ing idiot! We could’ve saved the trip over here!”

(I’m in the back taking money and orders when a customer pulls up to my window.)

Customer: “I heard that your chicken sandwiches aren’t made of chicken. I heard they’re actually made of rooster.”

Me: “Excuse me?”

Customer: “Your chicken sandwiches aren’t made of chickens, but roosters, right?”

Me: “Roosters are chickens, sir.”

Customer: “No, they’re not!”

Me: “Yes, roosters are male chickens and hens are female chickens.”

Customer: “Oh, it’s like that human thing, too… boy and girl! I see…” *drives off without ordering anything*

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(Note: I work at a charity that accepts donations.)

Customer: *quite loudly* “Where can I leave my domination clothing?”

Me: *stares shocked*

Customer: “That’s the wrong word, isn’t it?”