(I overhear this conversation between two four-year-olds at snack time.)
Child #1: “Did you know that five plus five is ten?”
Child #2: “Oh, yeah? So, you know what one plus one is?”
Child #1: “Um, I don’t know. I only know that five plus five is ten.”
(I work in a coffee shop situated on a strip of psychic shops in a downtown “witch city.” It is one of our busiest days.)
Customer: *cutting to the front of the line* “I have a question.”
Me: *continuing to make drinks* “Okay, shoot.”
Customer: “What are the hours of the psychic shop next door?”
(Baffled because the hours of said shop are in enormous white lettering on the shop window, I just look at her.)
Customer: “Well?”
Me: “I’m sorry. I don’t know off the top of my head, but if you—”
Customer: *loudly* “What do you mean you don’t know?”
Me: “I’m s—”
Customer: “HOW CAN YOU WORK NEXT DOOR AND NOT KNOW?!”
Me: *fed up at this point and trying to finish orders and get other people served* “I just don’t! But if you look on the window, I’m sure the hours will be there.”
(The woman starts to storm off.)
Me: *calling after her* “I’m sorry, but I’m not psychic!”
(I am browsing in a department store when I overhear this interaction between two brothers, probably about five and six years old.)
Older Kid: “Bigfoot! Biiiigfoot! I found Bigfoot!”
Younger Kid: “Who’s he?”
Older Kid: “From Star Wars!”
(It is a hot summer’s day, and my partner and I decide to spend the day at a popular lakefront beach. After swimming for a while, I take my place on the sand, get some sun, and read a book. Two little girls are laying on beach towels next to me, chatting and lazily digging holes. That’s when I overhear the ten-year-old girl say to the eight-year-old girl:)
Ten-Year-Old Girl: “…and then, all you have left is one dead body and twelve cupcakes.”
(A budding Wednesday Addams stand-up comedian?)
(I work at a small museum for a university. We have an exhibit on robotics that has nothing hands-on. The text panels are very technical and, to someone who has not studied robotics, rather dry. The exhibit is designed for older students and adults. However, many people want to bring their young children, anyway. I have this conversation over the phone.)
Me: “Hello, [Museum].”
Caller: “Hello, my son is in kindergarten and loves robots. I see on your website that you have a robotics exhibit. Do you think that coming to [Museum] would be a good way to introduce him to robotics?”
Me: “We do have a robotics exhibit; however, it is more about the history and development of robotics. There is nothing hands-on, and we recommend it for middle-school age to adult audiences. Lots of people do bring younger children, but some of the technical stuff on the text panels might be a little over his head.”
Caller: *her voice absolutely dripping with disdain* “It would not be over his head.” *hangs up on me*
(So, she basically called to ask a question to which she had already decided the answer. Unless that kid was a robotics prodigy, he was not going to get anything out of those text panels! She would have been better off buying a basic robotics kit to start him off. This was not the first or the last visitor who believed they had a genius child.)
