Waitstaff Don’t Ask These Questions For Fun, You Know

, , , , , | Friendly | June 28, 2020

My friend is the bad customer here. A few friends and I are eating late at night at a diner. My friend orders a ham and cheese sandwich and modifies the order some way, but I don’t remember exactly what he changes.

When the waitress stops by and asks how everything is, my friend smiles.

Friend: “Yeah, good, thanks.”

We all ask him why he didn’t speak up and he shrugs. At the end of the meal, the waitress brings the bill.

Waitress: “Okay, guys, here you go.”

Friend: “Well, actually, as you can see, I didn’t even eat this. It was gross, since you guys got my order wrong, and I couldn’t eat any of it.”

The waitress looks confused.

Waitress: “I’m sorry. When I asked if everything was all right you said yes, so I assumed…”

She looks at us for confirmation and we glare at my friend. He rolls his eyes.

Friend: “Yeah, well, clearly, it wasn’t. I didn’t eat it, so I’m not paying for it. And the fact that your kitchen got this basic modification wrong is horrible communication.”

We gaped at him, utterly confused by this sudden behavior; he is usually very temperate. The waitress apologized and went to remove his food from his bill. The rest of us rushed to pay our bills, so we could leave as fast as possible once he was done with his.

The waitress came back and my friend inspected the bill carefully to ensure he was not charged for it.

We left the waitress a big tip and berated my friend as soon as we were outside.

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Unfiltered Story #197591

, , , | Unfiltered | June 24, 2020

I do frames for a living in a popular retail store. I had a customer (probably in his mid 60s) come up to my counter and asked for the framer. I let him know that I was the framer and asked how I would be able to help.
The customer laughed and said I was cute for trying to pass off as a framer. When he realized I was not joking, he asked for *a* manager. (We have several managers for many departments and I was it for the framing one.)

He: I need to talk to a manager.
Me: I’m one of them. What can I help you with?
He: I really don’t like your attitude, you’ve been lying to me the whole time.

He goes to find someone else and he sees an associate. I can see the associate pointing to me.
He comes back.

He: Is there another manager I can speak to?
Me: Yes. *I spoke on the radio for the other manager to come.

Other manager (also female): how may I help you?

He got so red out of anger.

He: Management is a man’s job. Do you have any man I can speak to?
Me: we do not.

He starts screaming how this company was going to fail because we had no men as managers and that we were sexist for not hiring men. (We have 3 but they were off).

Irritated By Both Left And Right Humor

, , , , , | Right | June 17, 2020

A customer is watching a video while waiting for his order. My coworker tries three times to get his attention to ask if he wants it for here or to go, but to no avail.

I walk over to him and tap him on his right shoulder, hoping that he will look up and see that my coworker has been trying to get his attention. Instead, he looks over to the left where I have abruptly stopped after I realize it would be more appropriate for me to ask myself, since I am the one who tapped him.

Me: “Would you like your sandwich for here to go, sir?”

Customer: *Clearly irritated* “To go, please.”

At the counter, as he is paying:

Customer: “I’m curious why you tapped me on my right shoulder and then walked over to my left. Were you trying to play a joke on me?”

Me: “No, sir, I was not. I was only trying to get your attention for [Coworker], and I realized after tapping your shoulder that I should have waited there and asked you myself. Sorry if I scared you.”

Customer: “I’m not scared; I’m irritated at you.”

Me: “Oh. Again, I apologize; I really was only trying to get your attention.”

He then spent the next minute ranting to my coworker that I shouldn’t have played that “joke” on him. At that point, I, too, became extremely irritated but I distracted myself with cleaning to avoid any further contact with him. My coworker simply smiled and told him to have a nice day.

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Down With The Duck-shunds

, , , , , , | Right | June 5, 2020

I work in a higher-end department store and am constantly surprised by questions customers ask and how they behave but to this day this interaction takes the cake for me. 

A woman comes in wanting to get some new pillows. She specifically asks for down pillows. I show her the selection and she finds a type she likes the feel of.

Customer: “What is it made out of?”

Me: “It’s 100% down fill with a polyester blend cover.”

She gives me a look like I’m stupid.

Customer: “Well, I know that, but what is it filled with?”

I am a little confused, but I show her the tag on the pillow.

Me: “It’s filled with 100% down.”

Customer: *Exasperated* “But where is the down from?”

I understand what she’s asking now and double-check the tag.

Me: “Oh! I’m not exactly sure which type of bird they are from.”

Customer: “I can’t just buy it without knowing!”

Me: “I’m sorry, ma’am, I would be happy to check with my manager, but if they don’t list it on the tag there’s no way to know for sure.”

The customer looks horrified, and then stomps away.

Customer: “Well, I can’t just buy it without knowing! It could be anything! What if it’s from a dog?!” 

I didn’t fully process what she had said before she left but my manager, who was maybe ten feet away, caught it before I did and had to physically turn around so she didn’t laugh in the customer’s face. I got on a second later, blinked from confusion thinking, “Did that really just happen?” and then headed to the back to laugh out loud. 

I had assumed she wanted to know if it was duck or goose, but apparently, no one told her that dogs don’t have feathers.

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Always Sending Them Back From The Back

, , , , , , | Right | May 31, 2020

Some of the customers at our store have the misconception that they can exit or enter through the back door, which leads directly into our parking lot. Since the back of the store contains our work area, the manager’s office and safe, and hundreds of dollars of merchandise waiting to be stocked, and is sometimes cluttered with boxes of donations, we have a strict policy about not letting customers walk through there unless they are making a donation or transporting heavy furniture, in which case we would clear the pathway.

An elderly couple who have been in declining health for the last year have made repeated attempts to use that door, despite our persistent reminders not to do so. 

The husband knocks on the back door, while the wife makes a quick trip to the grocery store next door.

Me: “Hi, sir, the entrance is at the front door. We can’t let customers through here for insurance and safety reasons.”

He happily obliges and uses the front entrance. About ten minutes later, the wife walks in and they spend the next half hour shopping. After making their purchase, they get ready to leave.

The wife tells her husband:

Wife: “Let’s use the back door.”

The husband, who has difficulty speaking due to radiation for throat cancer, lightly tugs his wife’s shirt towards the front door. He strains to reply to his wife.

Husband: “We have to use the front.”

After having a brief, indistinct argument with her husband, the wife begins walking toward the back of the store. At this point, I step in.

Me: “I’m sorry, but we had an incident last week and we cannot allow customers to use the back door. Please use the front door to exit.”

We really did have an incident last week, which prompted me to print a sign near the back of the sales floor noting, “This is not an exit! Please use the front door.” On top of that, we have a lot of boxes in the back. Given their fragile health, letting them use the back would be a bigger risk than usual.

Wife: “You don’t understand; this is a man who belongs in the hospital. Now let us through the back!”

Me: “Ma’am, I understand your situation, but this has been our store’s policy for eighteen years. I’m sorry for the inconvenience, but you will need to use the front door.”

At this point, she flipped the middle finger with about half the store watching and, as fast as she could, walked out of the store with her seemingly unphased husband in tow. We have not seen them in the store since.

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