I’m Not Tomatopathic

, , , , , | Right | November 8, 2019

(One day, I seat a couple – a man and a woman. At first, they are polite, friendly, and cheerful. They go through the menu and I take their order. The woman chooses a popular meal which contains tomatoes. Said meal has the word “tomato” in the name, the picture of it in the menu clearly shows that it contains tomatoes, and the menu description also clearly states that it contains tomatoes. Like always, I repeat their order back to them to ensure I have it right, and the couple agrees I have it right. However, when their food is brought over, the woman pushes the plate away.)

Customer: “Oh. I ordered [tomato dish] by mistake; I meant to order [other dish].”

([Other dish] sounds and looks nothing like [tomato dish], but the couple have been polite and friendly up to this point, and I figure brain farts happen to the best of us, so I offer to go and get her the meal she wants, but still charge her the cheaper price of [tomato dish]. The woman suddenly stops smiling and glares at me.)

Customer: “Well, what are you going to do about this mistake?”

Me: “Um… like I just said, I’ll go and get you the meal you wanted. I can get the chef to prioritise it—”

Customer: “This is unacceptable. I want my meal for free because you messed up.”

Me: “Madam, you admitted you ordered the wrong item. You got what you ordered. As I said, I am happy to go and get you the meal you wanted at no extra cost, even though it is more expensive, but I can’t give you a free meal when we did not make a mistake.”

Customer: “You should have known it was a mistake!”

Me: “I read you your order back and you agreed it was correct. How was I supposed to know you had ordered the wrong thing?”

Customer: “Because I don’t like tomatoes!”

Me: *pausing for a second, dumbfounded* “Madam, you are a complete stranger. It is impossible for me to know what foods you do or don’t like unless you tell me.”

Customer: “But that’s your job! You’re supposed to know!”

(The woman then demands her entire meal for free, including the drinks and sides. When I refuse, she demands to speak to a manager. I go and get the manager on duty and explain the situation to her before we get to the table.)

Manager: “Madam, as [My Name] explained, we cannot give you a refund because you ordered the wrong thing. We are more than happy to make you the meal you actually wanted at no extra cost, but we cannot give you a refund.”

(The woman starts shrieking and threatens to walk out without paying. Luckily, my manager possesses what many other managers do not: a spine.)

Manager: “Madam, you have two options. Either you accept the offer [My Name] has given you to get you the meal you wanted, continue eating, and pay for it at the end, or you pay for what you’ve ordered so far and leave. Either way, you will be paying the full price for your food. If you refuse, I will call the police.”

(The woman quieted down and mumbled that she’d like to have the meal she originally wanted. For the rest of her meal, she complained quietly to the man she was with about how appalled she was that we wouldn’t compensate her for OUR mistake. When it came time to pay, I was worried she would try and bring up the discount again, but she agreed to the full amount. However, she locked eyes with me as she put her PIN into the card machine, glared, and told me she was never coming here ever again. Unsurprisingly, she didn’t leave a tip. It wasn’t a complete loss, though, because true to her word, she did not come back.)

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That Same Old Yarn

, , , | Right | November 8, 2019

(A lady comes into the craft shop where I work with a knitting pattern for a baby blanket. The pattern is for an expensive yarn and she has asked me to find a different one. After some time, we find one she seems to like.)

Customer: “This one is nice; I like the colour.”

Me: “Excellent. This one is different from the original yarn so I’ll need to work out the amount you need.” *calculates yarn amount* “Right, so, you’ll need eight balls of this one, which I’ll need to order in for you; is that okay?”

Customer: “Yes, that’s fine.”

(The yarn is ordered and arrives, so we call the customer to let her know it’s ready. She comes to collect it and I show it to her to confirm it’s the right one. All goes well until we come to the paying bit.)

Me: “That’ll be £40, please.”

Customer: “How much is this per ball?”

Me: “It’s £5 per ball.”

(It’s a nice yarn so a little higher on the price scale but not terrible.)

Customer: “Oh, I don’t like this yarn; it’s not the one I wanted.”

Me: “It’s the one you picked out when you came in.”

Customer: “No, it’s not. It’s not the right one. I wanted one from over there.” *waves at the shelf this yarn comes from*

Me: *growling internally* “That’s the one we have here.”

Customer: “No, I wanted this one.” *picks up a much cheaper £2-a-ball yarn*

Me: “That’s not the one you chose; you picked out this one before.”

Customer: “Well, I wanted this one, but in the colour of the one you have there.”

Me: “I see. I don’t have that yarn in this colour, though.”

Customer: “Oh, well, I’ll have to think about it, then.”

(The customer walked out of the shop, leaving me with the specially-ordered bag of yarn and a need to hit something.)

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Unfiltered Story #177098

, , , | Unfiltered | November 8, 2019

(I’m a sales assistant, but as a full-timer the part-timers often ask me for help in the absence of a manager)
Colleague: [my name] can you help?
Me: What’s up?
Customer: I bought a door handle but instead of a pair I have two of the same levers so it doesn’t work.
Me: Well, we can certainly exchange it, do you have it with you?
Customer: No, that’s why your colleague flagged you over.
Me: I see, well, we cannot give an exchange for a product that isn’t there, because if we’re lucky that will be docked from us, if you need a good pair now we can charge you for a new one and you can bring back the mispackaged pair. I already have had a similar situation and this is what the manager advised we do.
Customer: May I ask why that is?
Me: You may, and I shall explain by giving you this example. When we are given a large amount of money in cash, we have to have someone double count it and then, even if the customer requests, we cannot give them the money to count again. The reason for this is because there are those who would palm half the notes. Then they refund it after a few days and thus get a 50% profit.
Customer: *as if having a light bulb moment* They really do that?
Me: A few do, the majority of customers are good, honest people, but every basket has a few bad eggs, so we have precautions that we apply to everyone.
Customer: All right then.
Me: [Colleague] do you have the SKU for the door handle?
(I fetched the door handle for inspection before it was bought and she returned the faulty one without any upset whatsoever.)


, , , , , , , , | Working | October 29, 2019

My partner works in IT. Sometimes, he will have to reset passwords for internal systems. The formula for this is typically: Adjective – Noun – Number. These are one-use passwords that are automatically generated.

One day, my partner gets called into the office by the office manager. The man has a very grave expression on his face. Next to him is a middle-aged woman.

They sit my partner down and explain that he needs to be more sensitive and that they are sending him to sexual harassment training, giving him a warning, and if it happens again he will lose his job.

My partner is very confused, mainly because he has been in a committed relationship for ten years, and whilst not married, they have three kids together. He explains that he has no idea what’s going on, and he has never harassed someone intentionally.

Suddenly, the woman that my partner has never seen before pipes up and shouts, “It’s the d*** passwords. He’s sexually harassing me with his suggestive passwords!”

My partner looks even more confused and asks the office manager to explain. The woman is an internal client who locked herself out of the system. A randomly-generated password was sent out automatically from whoever was on out-of-hours call. It just happened to be my partner. He has never spoken to this woman in his life.

“What password?” my partner asks. “They’re randomly generated; you know that, right?”

The office manager gets extremely embarrassed, as he didn’t know that. He then asks the woman to write down the password so he can get the two words removed from the database, to make sure that the system does not generate any more offensive passwords.

The password that was generated? SadClown12

My partner and the office manager both get even more confused, and the manager asks the woman to explain how that could be offensive.

The woman then goes on to explain that it is an obscure sex act and she shouldn’t be harassed at work by such horrible language.

Makes you wonder how she knew about the sex act in the first place, if it was so offensive…

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For Some House Wine Costs As Much As The House

, , , | Right | October 28, 2019

(I’m taking a reservation for a large table over the phone. We offer an eat-as-much-as-you-can menu for £15 which includes EVERYTHING on the menu. Even the wine is cheap. We sell it for £9 a bottle. But even so, we get customers that do try to take advantage.)

Customer: “So, that’s a table of ten booked for [date], and could you also give an offer on drinks?”

Me: “Yep, all done for you. Our house wine starts from £9, which is super reasonable!”

Customer: “Don’t tell me that’s reasonable! Maybe some of us can’t afford to pay that! I can’t believe you expect us to pay that! Can’t you give it to us free?”

(I’m taken aback. We don’t give out free things readily. Besides, we have much larger tables, too.)

Me: “Well, there are soft drinks and you could also bring your own booze; there is no corkage fee. I think you can find wine across the road from £3, even.”

Customer: *getting agitated* “Maybe I can’t even afford that!” *starts to sob* “It’s my birthday. GIVE ME MY FREE WINE!”

(We gave up in the end and gave her a bottle for her table. She even had the cheek to ask that if she doesn’t eat that much, she wanted to pay less. I don’t think she grasped the concept of an “eat as much as you can” set price. If you can’t afford to eat out, don’t.)

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