Shining A Light On Your Deception

, | Working | September 10, 2016

(We have a new hire this season. While he’s a nice guy, he lacks common sense and basically has to be retrained on everything every day. He’s also known to be less than truthful to coworkers and clients. On this particular day, we’re performing spring maintenance on one of our systems.)

New Hire: “So I checked everything in the back and everything works.”

Me: “The lights over the BBQ were all good too?”

New Hire: “Yeah I saw them all on.”

(At this point, the client has asked me to take a look at a receptacle that is near the BBQ, but completely unrelated to our system.)

Me: *sticking voltmeter into outlet* “It doesn’t have power, but it could be on the same breaker as your pool equipment. I’d say once that’s up and running for the season, check it again. If it still isn’t working we can take a deeper look.”

New Hire: *has zero idea what I’m talking about* “Oh, there’s no power there? That would be why those lights didn’t come on.”

Me: “You said you checked everything and it all worked…”

New Hire: “Well, yeah, but these ones aren’t working now because you said there isn’t power in that outlet.”

Me: “That outlet has nothing to do with our system. Did the lights work or not?”

New Hire: “Well, since you said that wasn’t working I wanted to make it sound like the lights weren’t either because there was no power.”

Me: “You still didn’t answer me. Were the lights on or not? You either lied to me or the client and neither one is acceptable.”

New Hire: “Dude why are we even talking about this?”

(He couldn’t understand why I was upset about him being dishonest. I checked the lights myself, something I planned to do regardless. Lo and behold, they worked just fine.)

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Getting The Message Across

| Working | August 8, 2015

(My dad works at a company that designs and produces light fixtures. His division is him, two other people, and the boss, a loud Irish man well-known for his bad language.)

Boss: *storms in and shouts* “One of you, e-mail [Client] and tell him to F*** OFF FOR A BIT!”

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Not His Best Light-Bulb Moment

| Working | April 13, 2015

(A delivery driver arrives at our fairly small office, and I’m the one who was free to go to help bring in the shipment.)

Delivery Driver: “So what’s in all these boxes anyway?”

(As he asks, he grabs the first box and SLAMS it down on the tailgate of the truck.)

Me: “…that would be light bulbs.”

Delivery Driver: “…oh.”

(Luckily for both of us, we deal with LED lights – which are made of plastic, not glass!)

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