A Series Of Unfortunate Questions

| ID, USA | Right | March 7, 2017

Patron: “Do you have Miss Peregrine’s Series of Unfortunate Events?”

Me: “That’s actually two separate book series: Miss Peregrine’s Home for Peculiar Children and A Series of Unfortunate Events.” *checks computer* “The first Miss Peregrine book is checked out, but the second and third are available, and we have all the books in A Series of Unfortunate Events.”

Patron: “I’ll take the second book, and I’ll take all the ‘Series of Unfortunate Events’ books.”

Me: “All right, let me show you where they are.”

(I take the patron to the shelves and pull the first book, then show him where the ‘Unfortunate Events’ series is located.)

Me: “Is there anything else I can help you with?”

Patron: “Do you have ‘Miss Peregrine’ on DVD?”

Me: “Unfortunately, it hasn’t been released on DVD yet. We can put you on hold for it, though.”

Patron: “Oh, okay… We have a VCR; do you have it on VHS?”

Me: “Um… no. I don’t think it’s going to be released on VHS.”

Patron: “Oh, okay… So do I read Series of Unfortunate Events before or after Miss Peregrine?”

Me: *realizes I’m not dealing with the brightest light in the harbor* “Actually, they’re two separate series by two different authors. Series of Unfortunate Events has nothing to do with Miss Peregrine.”

Patron: “Oh, so they’re like sequels?”

Me: “No. They’re two different book series. One has nothing to do with the other.”

Patron: “So, it’s like another season of the show?”

Me: “No, they’re completely separate book series. They don’t have the same characters or the same story or anything. They’re two. Separate. Stories.”

Patron: “Oh… so which one do I read first? Which is the sequel?”

Your Empathy Is Disabled

, | UK | Friendly | March 2, 2017

(The entrance to the library we have been studying in has a few steps to climb. Because of the dimensions of the room however, a disabled ramp isn’t feasible, so there is a small elevator instead. We are all heading out.)

Friend: “I’m so tired.” *yawns*

Me: “Same. I’m collapsing on my bed tonight.”

Friend: *nods and presses the button for the lift*

(We all stop.)

Me: “What are you doing?”

Friend: “Going down.”

Other Friend: “That’s for the disabled!”

Friend: “Well, I’m disabled. I’M TIRED!”

Me: “That’s not how it works…”

(She shrugged and took the lift instead of walking down the FOUR STEPS a wheelchair-using person would find impossible to navigate, in full view of the entrance, with at least 20 people glaring from outside.)

Not Exactly Clean Eating

| CA, USA | Right | February 23, 2017

(Some cleaning solution has spilled on a table and dried. A four-year-old boy sees the stain, wipes up a bit on his finger, and licks it.)

Boy: *perplexed* “That’s not candy.”

Me: *speechless*

They’ve Saigon The Wrong Way

, | Brooklyn, NY, USA | Learning | February 20, 2017

(Two young boys have come into the library and pulled down a massive atlas. The librarian comes over to see what they’re doing.)

Librarian: “Aren’t these big maps lovely? Let’s see, what do we have here… What are you boys looking for?”

Student #1: “We’re gonna find the place where [Teacher] was born!”

Librarian: “Uh…okay. And, can you tell me, where was [Teacher] born?”

Students: *in unison* “Madison, Wisconsin!”

(Pause.)

Librarian: “This is a map of Vietnam.”

(Longer pause.)

Student #2: “So… we’re not going to find Madison, Wisconsin?”

Librarian: “Not on this map. You need–”

(Both boys started sobbing.)

Don’t Let Your Hair Go

| NH, USA | Right | February 7, 2017

(When I arrive at work, I realize I have forgotten my purse. As I am wearing prescription sunglasses and my regular prescription glasses are in my purse, I must return to my car to retrieve it, making me late. My boss is very understanding, but I am still stressed out about it until the following happens on my way back. Note that I am wearing my extremely dark hair in a single braid over one shoulder, black jeans, sunglasses, and a dark turquoise knit tee.)

Little Girl: *waves at me* “Hi!”

Me: *waves back* “Hi!”

Little Girl: “Daddy! Daddy! She looks like Elsa!”

Dad: “She… does?”

Me: “Um, I think it’s the braid.”

Dad: “Oh!”

(It made my day!)

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