Delinquency Takes A Lot Of Training

, , , | Related | January 10, 2019

(I find a job offer as a librarian in a French youth protection and juvenile justice academy. I’m talking to my mother about the offer.)

Me: “Besides, juvenile delinquency is an interesting subject.”

Mother: *a little anxious* “Ah, the theme is juvenile delinquency?”

Me: “Yes.”

Mother: “But it’s a school for those who want to help young people get out of delinquency?”

Me: “Yes.”

Mother: *relieved* “Phew!”

Me: “Wait, did you really think this was a school to become delinquents?”

Mother: “Yes…”

I Don’t Have The Words

, , , | Right | January 6, 2019

(The phone rings at the library where I work, so I answer it. We’re a big, two-story library in the middle of a small town, and have been for over ten years.)

Me: “[Library], can I help you?”

Caller: “Yeah, uh, y’all got a lot of books?”

Even The Famous Five Couldn’t Make Sense Of This

, , , | Right | January 1, 2019

(I work in a library. A community service student from a local high school is shelving in the junior fiction section, when I overhear this encounter.)

Customer: “Excuse me. That catalogue over there says that The Folk of the Faraway Tree is on loan; see, my daughter really wants that book.”

Student: “I can get one of the librarians for you; I’m sure you can reserve it or something.”

Customer: “No, I need it today. This is a library, isn’t it? What kind of library doesn’t have an Enid Blyton book?”

Me: “Hey. Anything I can help with?”

Customer: “I just don’t understand how a library doesn’t have that book.”

Me: “Well, we do have it; it’s just currently on loan. I can organise a reservation for you; you will be the next to get it.”

Customer: “It’s a very popular book. I don’t understand why it’s not on the shelf.”

Me: “Probably because it’s a very popular book.”

Customer: “No, it should be on the shelf.”

Me: “The best I can offer you today is a reservation.”

Customer: *big sigh* “I guess I have to buy it, then. I’m really disappointed, though, that such a popular book is on loan. A classic like that shouldn’t be; it should be available. It’s a classic, a popular classic. There’s no reason for someone else to have it out.” *leaves*

Student: “That made no sense at all.”

Me: “Don’t think about it for too long; it will give you a headache.”

Student: “I’m going to find a career path where I don’t have to deal with the general public.”

Maybe The Library Has Books About What Libraries Are, Part 2

, , , , , , | Learning | December 31, 2018

(I am working circulation at the library when a student comes up to me. This student is in an upper grade, and reading at grade level, so I’m confident he knows how libraries should work.)

Student: “I’d like to return my library books.”

Me: “Okay, you can put them in the return bin, use the self-check station, or bring them to me since I’m not busy.”

Student: “I don’t have them.”

Me: “Well, go back to class and get them.”

Student: “I don’t know where they are.”

Me: “I can’t check them in if you don’t have them.”

Student: “But I’m finished, and would like to check out more.”

Me: *pulling up his account* “You have four out right now, and two are overdue, so I can’t let you check out any more books.”

Student: “But I want to check my books in.”

Me: “You have to actually give me the books so I can scan them in.”

Student: *gives me a confused look*

Me: “Bring your books back and then I can help you.”

(I haven’t seen him in the library for the rest of the week.)

Related:
Maybe The Library Has Books About What Libraries Are

Yaoi Got To Be Kidding, Part 3

, , , , , | Right | December 21, 2018

(A woman buys a yaoi manga — male/male Japanese comic — off of our sales rack. A few minutes later, she comes up to the front desk.)

Customer: “I want to exchange this for something else! I didn’t know this manga had such content! I don’t read things like this; it’s against my religion! I read only wholesome manga!”

(My coworker does the exchange. Once the customer leaves, she shows me the cover of the manga. Very clearly it has two men in a loving embrace, one has their shirt off, and there are roses everywhere.)

Coworker: “How could she not know this was yaoi?”

Related:
Yaoi Got To Be Kidding, Part 2
Yaoi Got To Be Kidding

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