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It’s Only A Matter Of Time “Till” Someone Snaps

, , , | Right | January 9, 2022

I worked in a bakery on the weekend morning shifts when I was fifteen. I started at 4:00 am and opened the shop at 6:00 am with the managers not starting until 8:00 or 8:30.

A customer got wise and used to try and pull the old “I actually paid with a fifty, but you only gave me a twenty” trick, usually around 6:30. Our float never had fifties, so it was pretty easy to tell. I would ask him if he was sure and tell him that if he had an issue, he should come back at 8:00 when the manager started. He never did.

After about five months of this, one day (after a late night), he tried it again on my coworker who was a fourteen-year-old girl and barely five feet tall. He was really being insistent to the point of aggressive. So, mid-serving another customer, I just lost it.

I slammed the open till buttons on both tills.

Me: “WELL, WHERE IS IT, THEN, C***?”

He promptly stuttered a reply and left. He didn’t try that trick again, at least when I was on shift.

Don’t Copy This Scam Again!

, , , , , | Legal | January 8, 2022

I work the phones at our small company. Because we are a business, we have typical things like copy machines. A call comes in asking for the model number of our copy machine so they can send us the toner. This is a scam where they ask for the model number, send out toner to our office at two times the cost, and bill us.

We also already have extra toner from when the machine was serviced last week. We also have a contract with the company that sold the copy machine to us, so I know this is fake. However, I decide to play along.

Scammer: “We just need the model number of your copier so we can send you the toner.”

Me: “Shouldn’t you have that already?”

Scammer: “Yes, we have the serial number but not the model number.”

Me: “If you have a serial number, then shouldn’t you be able to figure out what the model number is from the contract? Can you give me the serial number?”

Scammer: “Shut up, you f****** a**hole.” *Hangs up*

I couldn’t help but laugh.

It’s Just The Law, NBD

, , , , , | Right | CREDIT: binnsy79 | January 8, 2022

I am a manager at a sub shop chain. We were serving a customer who just started ordering when another customer came in and interrupted to ask what the sub of the day was. This got my hackles up because he was rude about it.

I then looked up and noticed a car parked in the mobility parking space directly in front of our big glass doors. I asked the interruption customer:

Me: “Is that your car, sir?”

Customer: “Yes.”

Me: “Do you have a mobility parking permit?”

Customer: “No, I broke my back, and I can’t walk that far.”

Me: “You need a permit to be allowed to park there.”

Customer: “I’m still waiting for it to come.”

Me: “It’s illegal to park in there unless you have a permit. You need to move your car.”

Customer: “I’ll just get my food and then I’ll move it. It’s only going to be a couple of minutes.”

Me: “No, you need to move your car now.”

The man then planted his feet and dropped his shoulders almost like a three-year-old who is not going to do what you asked.

It sucks, but we can’t actually do much to make people move from those parking places other than ask them to move. The tow truck would take too long; they would already be gone by the time the tow truck got here.

I decided to say the only thing I could in this situation. I did a lot of theater in high school so I know how to project my voice without yelling.

Me: “Sir, we will not be serving you unless you move your car.”

He spun around (like only someone who has an intact back could do) and stomped out like a big man child, threw himself into his car, and sped off like someone was chasing him.

Maybe If You Focused On Your Job You Wouldn’t Need The Money?

, , , , | Working | January 6, 2022

[Coworker] hustled me out of some money last year. She made a stained glass effect painting with my name on it — apparently, I said I like stained glass? — handed it to me, and then asked for a “donation” to cover the costs. I was unprepared and too put upon to say no.

She tried it again, this time with food. She baked some passable savouries and only mentioned the price after people picked them up. It’s like everything she does comes at a cost. She once charged a coworker a few pence for a cup of tea because she used her teabags (not the company-provided free ones) when she offered to make drinks.

I keep well away from her, and I don’t take anything from her.

One morning, she comes in with a covered pot and walks straight to me.

Coworker: “Hey, [My Name]. I made you some food for your trip this weekend.”

I don’t know how she knows about it; I don’t even talk to her.

Me: “Oh, really? You didn’t have to.”

Coworker: “It’s chicken wings in BBQ sauce.”

My trip is to a well-known fishing resort; however. I don’t fish and will be staying at the all-inclusive resort, so they are useless to me.

Me: “They look… lovely…. but I’m a vegetarian; I can’t eat these.”

Coworker: “What? You’re eating meat now.”

Me: “No, look. It’s the vegetarian version. See?”

Coworker: “Well, maybe you could take them for your fishing buddies; they would appreciate them.”

Me: “Oh, it’s just me and my wife going.” *Quickly* “She’s vegetarian, too.”

Coworker: “Well, I can’t eat it. I don’t even like chicken. I paid a lot for all the ingredients. I need the money back!”

She looks at me expectantly, the pot still aimed at me.

Me: “Sorry I can’t be more help. Why don’t you put them in the break room?”

Coworker: “No, Human Resources told me I couldn’t sell my food in there anymore or they would write me up.”

Get the hint, [Coworker]!

She stood around for a while before eventually leaving.

Coworker #2: “How long have you been vegetarian?”

Me: “Since yesterday when the shop only had vegetarian sandwiches left. But seriously, did you see that chicken? Scrawny, cheap stuff.”

Coworker #2: “Yeah, I bought some food off her last month. Wasn’t even cooked properly.”

We mentioned it to HR, but as she said she was only going to ask for “donations,” she wasn’t technically breaking any rules. They still told her to pack it in, but not before she tried again by making me a salad that was mostly onion. I politely refused.

Is Your Imaginary Coworker Robert Downey, Jr.?!

, , , | Right | January 5, 2022

I once had a couple come in who’d bought a bed.

Man: “We were told we’d get free bedding.”

We’ve never given away free bedding.

Me: “Who was it that told you that?”

Man: “I don’t know, but he had dark hair.”

Me: “Short, with round glasses and a mustache?”

Man: *Nods eagerly* “Yes, yes!”

Me: “Nobody works here with that description.”

His face fell and he continued to tell me he was promised the bedding. I told him to get out and informed my boss.