No Longer Allowed To Pick Up Your Dead Weight

, , , , , , , | Working | March 7, 2018

(I work two different jobs, one through the week, the other only on the weekends. I have just had a minor surgery on my upper right arm. After the procedure, I am told that I am not allowed to lift more than ten pounds for the next two weeks, in order to fully recover. This is fine; my first job as a librarian allows me to sit at a computer and doesn’t often require me to carry heavy objects. My second job as a cashier, however, requires me to lift 24-packs of water, 30-packs of beer, etc., because customers often place these on the belt. I let both jobs know ahead of time that I would be having surgery, and made sure to get a note from my doctor saying I wasn’t allowed to lift more than ten pounds. I go into my second job early to hand them the note and see if I can work at the self-check lanes for my shift, which is only four hours long. There is one person who never works register, because they complain that it “hurts their back” to check for a long period of time, and they happen to be working at this time.)

Me: “Hey, [Coworker #1], I had surgery the other day, and I have a doctor’s note here saying that I can’t lift more than 10 pounds. I see that [Coworker #2] is on the self-check; do you think they’ll let me switch them?”

Coworker #1: “Probably not, but we can go over and ask, anyway.”

(We walk over to [Coworker #2]. I have a noticeable bandage on my right arm.)

Coworker #1: “[My Name] has a doctor’s note saying she can’t lift more than ten pounds. Would it be okay if you moved over to a regular lane?”

Coworker #2: *takes a brief glance at my bandaged arm and sighs* “Well, my back’s been bothering me today, and I really don’t feel like checking right now.”

Me: “But I just had surgery the other day, and I have a note that says I am not allowed to lift a certain amount; it could tear the stitches.”

Coworker #2: “Well, I guess, but my back has been hurting.”

Me: *cuts in, slightly annoyed* “Look: I have an official doctor’s note, and I think that it’s a little more valid than you just saying that your back is hurting.”

Coworker #2: *huffs* “Fine, but if my back starts bothering me, I want to switch back.”

(They stalked away to the regular checkout lanes, and I took my place at the self-check. The entire time we worked, they apparently talked about me to our other coworkers, and occasionally they shot me dirty looks. They did ask what I had surgery for, as if the bandage wasn’t enough proof. Shockingly, they never did ask to switch, so I guess their back wasn’t hurting them as much as they thought!)

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A Fee To Charge A Cancellation Fee

, , , , , | Working | March 6, 2018

(The only cable company available in my area is notorious for its bad customer service. I call them when my contract is expiring:)

Agent: “We don’t have any Internet-only plans.” *a lie*

Me: *young and naive* “Really? That sucks. Are you sure?”

Agent: “Yes. But I can offer you a deal that’s only $10 more a month!”

Me: “Are you sure that’s your only offer?”

Agent: “Yes.”

Me: “All right. I guess I’ll take it.”

(Later, when it’s a month before that contract expires, and I’m a little wiser, I go to the post office.)

Me: “Hello! I am here to mail my cable company’s box back to them.”

Mail Employee: “Oh. It’s that company. I’m going to print your receipt. Don’t lose it. They will claim you never sent the box and charge you.”

Me: “Got it.”

(Later, I call the cable company.)

Me: “Hi! I’m calling to make sure you received my package. I have the tracking number.”

Agent: “About that. We got it, but did you realize that you sent it a week early? We need to charge you a cancellation fee for that.”

Me: “What?!”

Agent: “You must have the box in your house until the contract expires, or it counts as an early cancellation.”

Me: “But then you’ll charge me a late fee for the time it takes to mail!”

Agent: “You could always use our store centers to drop it off.”

Me: “So, your ‘convenient mail-in system’ is a scam?”

Agent: “Of course not, ma’am! You just mailed it too early.”

Me: *switching tactics* “What about your online streaming thingy? I can still watch that, so it’s not a cancellation.”

Agent: “I’m sorry, but you must have the box in your home.”

(I finally give up and pay. I specifically ask to switch to a no-frills, Internet-only deal. The next month, my bill tries to charge me for a frill: an “Internet Boost!” that speeds up the Internet, or some scam like that. I call again.)

Agent: “I’m sorry it ended up on your bill, but it’s been half a month and you’ve already used the boost.”

Me: “How was I supposed to know it was there if you don’t generate my bill until the middle of the month? I called as soon as I was made aware.”

Agent: “I’m sorry, but you have used it.”

Me: “But it won’t appear again, right?”

Agent: “Not at all, ma’am!”

(Yeah, right. I annoyed the billing department every single day the next month by checking my bill and getting promises not to add it. It appeared again, and I said, “I don’t care anymore! I will live without Internet! It isn’t worth this nightmare!” Suddenly, they seemed all accommodating. I got it off my bill. Little did they know that I was moving in three months. That was also interesting. They tried to charge me a late equipment return fee for the cable box, which they took off my bill three more times, and they called me five times to convince me to stay with them. I told them I was moving wherever they weren’t, and that ended each call quickly, thankfully. I am so glad to get away from that company.)

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Employee Frozen In Place

, , , , , | Working | March 5, 2018

I am at a popular state-wide gas station chain to buy myself a drink for the road. The store is pretty busy, but there is only one cashier working. By the time I pick my drink out and get in line to pay, the line is five or six people long. The person at the front of the line has a fairly large order.

The cashier repeatedly presses the button to call for her coworker to come get on a register. My dad works in one of these gas stations, so I know that this releases a very long, loud buzzing sound in the stock area. It’s pretty hard to miss, and you can even hear it a bit in the front of the store. Still, there’s no sign of the other employee. At this point, the cashier and customers are starting to go from frustrated to concerned.

Finally, the cashier pulls out her phone and tries calling the employee, but there’s still no response. At this point, a customer ducks out of line and charges into the freezer — an employee-only area, but it’s not like anyone is going to stop him — and emerges a few seconds later, fuming and dragging the second employee by the arm. The cashier proceeds to yell at him. It turns out he was listening to music with earbuds in. Why he didn’t answer his phone, he doesn’t say.

The line splits in half, and I end up second or so in line at the new cashier’s register. He doesn’t speak to any customer and, once my drink is in its bag, proceeds to throw it at me. Too exhausted to do anything about it, I turn around and leave.

As I walk out the door, I hear the guy say, “Can I go back to the freezer, now?” My only regret is that I didn’t stick around to hear the other cashier’s response. A week later, a “Help Wanted” sign showed up on their door… I wonder why!

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Isn’t Used To This Kind Of Treatment

, , , , , | Healthy | March 2, 2018

(I volunteer in the emergency room of a very large hospital. I’ve volunteered in other departments as well, so I’m quite familiar with the layout. I notice a woman wandering around looking lost, so I greet her and ask if I can help her find where she’s going.)

Patient: “Yeah, I have some questions about some medical treatment I’m going to be receiving.”

Me: “Sure. Which department do you need?”

Patient: “I’m not telling you my personal medical information!”

Me: “You don’t have to, ma’am. I only need to know the category of treatment so I know where to direct you.”

Patient: “Isn’t there some kind of central information desk?”

Me: “Yes, but you’ll have to tell them the same thing.”

Patient: “Well, my medical information is confidential. Just tell me where I can get my questions answered.”

Me: “In order to do that, I need some idea of what you’re here for.”

Patient: “This is a very disorganized hospital.” *walks away*

(I probably should have just directed her to Psych.)

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Landing A Job Causes Someone Else To Crash

, , , , , , , | Working | March 2, 2018

(I am a teenager fresh out of school. I need some money but don’t have much work experience, so I apply for several retail and entry-level jobs. I get a few interviews, including one at a well-known retail chain, [Store]. The interview goes well, and I am told I’ll hear from them within the week. In the meantime, I continue going on interviews, and about two weeks later I accept a job in another field. Two full months after my interview at [Store], I get the following phone call:)

HR Representative: “Hi, this is [HR Representative] from [Store], calling for [My Name]. We just wanted to let you know that your first shift is on Monday, so we need you to come in and fill out some paperwork before then.”

Me: “Oh, I’m sorry. It’s been so long since the interview, and I hadn’t heard anything, so I accepted another position. I appreciate your call, but I’m afraid I won’t be able to work with you.”

HR Representative: “But you filled out an application and said you wanted a job.”

Me: “Yes, I did. But my interview was two months ago, and no one from [Store] ever contacted me to offer me a job, or to tell me that I was in line for one. Your call is the first contact I’ve had. I applied several places and have accepted a position in another field. I really needed a job, you see, so I took one when it was offered.”

HR Representative: “Well, we’re really short-staffed, so we need you to start on Monday.”

Me: “Again, I’m sorry, but I really can’t. The job I’ve accepted is full-time, Monday to Friday, so I really wouldn’t be available for anything beyond occasional part-time work.”

HR Representative: “But we need you on Monday.”

Me: *pause* “…and I’m very sorry, but I am not available.”

HR Representative: “You shouldn’t lie on your application. If you say you want a job, you should take it when it’s offered.”

Me: “That’s exactly what I did.”


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