An Alarming Embarrassment

, , , , | | Right | July 13, 2019

(I work at a local retail store where we carry a variety of fashion items; some have those little beige things called gators that cause the alarms to sound. I have just finished taking a gator off a purse for a woman, and she has not yet paid for it.)

Customer #1: “Do you mind if I swing that through the door really quick?”

Me: “Excuse me?”

([Customer #2] and I exchange a look.)

Customer #1: “You know, just to make sure the alarms won’t go off.”

Me: “Go ahead.”

([Customer #1] proceeds to take the purse over to the door and swing it wildly in front of her through the alarm doors.)

Customer #1: “Sorry, it’s just so embarrassing when the alarms go off!”

Fast Food Or Your Money Back

, , , , , | | Working | July 5, 2019

(My brother and I go to a [Popular Fast Food Chain] for lunch one day. The place is rather empty. We place our orders and then sit at a booth until it is ready. We get our milkshakes and drinks pretty quickly, but it is about 15 minutes before we get the rest of our order. We aren’t in any hurry so it doesn’t really bother us. After we get our order, we start to eat, but then the manager came to our table.)

Manager: “Excuse me for a minute, but I would like to apologize for it taking so long. Normally, we have food out within a few minutes. Since you had to wait so long, I would like to refund your meal.”

Me: *stunned* “Oh, no, really. It’s fine. We weren’t in any hurry; a refund’s not necessary.”

Manager: “Please allow me to refund you, anyway. It’s an issue for me when our service isn’t prompt. Our new employee was in back talking and there was no excuse for this. We don’t mind, and you’re getting a free meal out of it.”

(I ended up getting the refund after all. It’s wonderful to know that there are people who truly care about the quality of the service!)

Alcohol Makes You Flirt With Danger

, , , , , | Right | November 5, 2018

(My high school choir works concessions for home games and I usually take cash from the customers and hand back change. While I do get flirted with a bit, especially by the younger, drunk customers, this one just takes the cake. I take his order and hand back his change.)

Drunk Customer: “So, what are you doing after this?”

Me: “Going home.”

Drunk Customer: “Not going to tailgate some?”

Me: “No, especially since I’m not old enough.”

Drunk Customer: “Okay. Wait, how old is not old enough?”

(At this point, I drop the polite customer service voice I’d been using and speak as if to a small child.)

Me: “I’m. Not. Legal.”

Drunk Customer: “Oh. OH! Sorry, I’m a little drunk.”

(Yeah, I noticed that.)

Murder Is Child’s Play

, , , , | Right | August 31, 2018

(I work the front desk at a hotel. We are very busy this morning for breakfast and have many people coming in and out of the lobby. We have a bell connected to the doors, so every time the doors open, the bell rings to alert us that someone is coming in. The following is an interaction with a guest:)

Guest: “What is making that god-awful bell go off over and over?!”

Me: “Oh, it’s from the automatic door opening and closing.”

Guest: “I would have stabbed the thing by now!”

Me: “Oh, that’s nothing compared to when children start running back and forth in front of the doors, thinking it’s fun to make the doors open and close.”

Guest: “Well, I think it’s fun to run children over with my car when they are being little f***tards, but that doesn’t make it okay!” *walks away*

Me: “…”

Suspicious Behavior Is Often Suspect

, , , , , | Right | June 18, 2018

(I work at a fast food joint that’s connected to a gas station. We open at six in the morning, but the gas station is open 24 hours. At night, there’s only one person in the gas station. Just as my coworkers and I are opening for the day, a few seconds after we unlock the doors and turn the lights on in the lobby, this guy comes in.)

Guy: “I want to speak to your manager.”

(I tell my manager that someone is here and wants to talk to her. She comes over and signs me into the register, but he just stares and doesn’t say anything until she goes in to the back.)

Guy: “Did you just clock in?”

Me: “No, I was just getting logged into the register. What can I get for you today?”

(He looks around nervously and scans the parking lot behind him from the counter. He then mumbles something and leaves. I go and tell my other coworkers about this guy. A little bit later, one of my coworkers is in the back stock room where the back drive-thru window is. She spots him at the window looking inside, studying the stockroom. They stare at each other for a few seconds, but then she freaks out and runs away. We then go tell the people working at the gas station, and they say that he has been here since two am and spent three hours in the bathroom. They say they should have called the cops but didn’t because they thought he was just a dumba**. After the shift change in the gas station, one of the managers over there calls the cops because the guy’s car is still there but no one knows where he is. The cops come, and we tell them what happened, and then I spot him out in the parking lot trying to get in his car. He then goes to the gas station and asks:)

Guy: “So, I guess the cops have my car keys, huh?”

Gas Station Employee: “No, but the cops are on their way.”

(He is standing right by their office, and then he disappears. We’re told to keep an eye out for him if he comes back. It turns out he has gone into the gas station’s office and stockroom and is trying to hide in there! One of the employees spots him in there after a while and goes and tells the cops, who are standing around outside. The guys runs out of the office and into our lobby and he asks us:)

Guy: “Uh, you guys got anyone off that can give me a ride somewhere? I need to get out of here.”

(The cops cornered him. We later found out that the guy was wanted in two different states and was arrested!)

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