They Have A Spotty Sales Record

, , , , | Working | March 22, 2018

(I’m about 16, and my self-esteem is at an all-time low. My family and I are doing Christmas shopping, so we’re walking through a mall. I walk by a kiosk that offers a brand-name acne wash “cure.”)

Attendant: “Oh, my God! Look at your face!”

(Way not to make me want to buy your product.)

They “Fired” Themselves

, , , , | Working | February 14, 2018

(Not long before this story, I took over as store manager. A kiosk opens up in the mall directly outside of my department store. The salespeople are rude and loud, and they aggressively harass customers passing by. They escalate to actually coming into my store to try to sell to customers shopping inside. After several emails to the mall management about this issue go unanswered, I go speak to them myself.)

Me: “I have a written report of every incident. I’m not going to put up with this any longer.”

Mall Management: “Quit pretending this is a big deal. They are only there for six months. Work it out between you and them.”

Me: “This is your responsibility, not mine, to fix.”

Mall Management: “No, and frankly, I don’t want you coming back here to whine unless they set your store on fire!”

(I forward a complaint to my higher-ups, and instruct staff to alert us when there is an issue. I find out that one of the kiosk workers has been using the men’s room downstairs, but I am not allowed to bar them from doing so. The whole time, they are still harassing my customers from the kiosk, yelling into the store. Then, a few weeks later, a smoke alarm goes off. An employee responds to find a small fire, which he puts out with an extinguisher, but the fire department still has to respond. A half-hour later, I walk into the mall management office.)

Me: “I need to complain about the kiosk employees.”

Mall Management: “I told you not to bother me unless–“

(His eyes go wide. A fireman is walking in behind me.)

Me: “Right, and it turns out one of the employees was smoking in our bathroom, set off the smoke detector, panicked, and threw the cigarette into the waste paper basket, catching it on fire. Now, can we discuss how you are going to solve this and the costs incurred?”

(The kiosk’s lease was terminated.)

1 Thumbs

Their Sales Pitch Has Multiple Spots Of Failure

, , , , , | Working | November 30, 2017

(I am walking through the mall one evening, and as I pass a kiosk set up in the aisle I am approached by a woman trying to sell skin lotion. At the time I am experiencing a severe breakout of cystic acne all along my jaw bone, something that happens to me every three to six months and is only controllable by one product that I already own.)

Woman: “Hello! Would you like a free sample?”

Me: “No, thank you.”

Woman: “But it’s really good for your skin! It would help you!”

Me: “Pardon?”

Woman: “Look: this product is a very good moisturizer. It is also effective at repairing any sort of damage from sunburns or other scarring. It’s a really great product; would you like to try it?”

Me: “No, I’m really not interested.”

Woman: “But it would help with your acne, and scarring!”

Me: *now fuming, staring at the woman*

Woman: “Yes, with your acne you really should use this product! It has all these wonderful features, such as—”

Me: “Does it have an antibiotic?”

Woman: “Pardon?”

Me: “What is the active ingredient that makes it so effective against acne?”

Woman: “I’m a skincare specialist; I know it works wonders on acne, and—”

Me: “I’m really not interested in trying something that will not work.”

Woman: “Well, what do you use?”

Me: “I use a topical treatment that contains clindamycin.”

Woman: “Contains what?”

Me: “Clindamycin.”

Woman: “I’ve never heard of that. This product is—”

Me: “Yes, I’m not surprised you haven’t heard of clindamycin. You are selling a skincare product; you are not a skincare specialist. I have a prescription for my product from a specialist, and I have no interest in buying your product. Please leave me alone.”

(She kept talking, so I just walked away. I have never worked in sales, but I can tell you that trying to snag a new customer by first telling them they have bad acne, and then trying to tell them you know better than they do how to handle it, is pretty harsh.)

Dropped That Sale

, , , , | Working | November 14, 2017

(I have just had a meeting at a coffeehouse inside a mall. I am walking back towards the entrance and am passing a phone accessory kiosk when the following happens.)

Kiosk Employee: *calling out* “Excuse me, miss?”

(I keep walking, assuming it’s a sales pitch. He calls after me again.)

Kiosk Employee: “Miss, you dropped something!”

(This is plausible, as I am rather clumsy and scatterbrained at times, so I stop.)

Me: “Thank you! What did I drop?”

Kiosk Employee: “Well, you didn’t actually drop anything just now, but if you had dropped your phone, wouldn’t you want a good case to protect it?”

Me: “Even if I didn’t already have one, I certainly wouldn’t be buying from you after that stunt!”

Put The Wrong Foot Forward

, , , | Right | October 9, 2017

(I work in a kiosk in the middle of a mall, and I have stores on both sides of me. I often have customers ask for directions. I am often amused when someone asks me about a store only a few fronts away, but I’m not expecting this one.)

Customer: “Hi! Could you tell me where [Children’s Clothing Store] is?”

(I automatically point to the store front, but words stop short when I realize where I’m pointing.)

Customer: *looks in the direction I’m pointing* “Oh, dear! It’s just a foot behind me, and I just walked by it! I must look like an idiot!”

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